Hello, my dear and loyal reader! I’ve missed you! Did you miss me? Probably not. You’re out having kinky fun and I’m stuck at home dressing my hand up in a little black leather glove. My own personal gimp. You know, normal Tuesday shit.
Sorry, what are we talking about? Oh! I guess we have t started yet, have we? Well, I guess it’s time to dive in, right?
Recently, I had a post about feelings of inadequacy and rejection and all sorts or bad emotional things that make a good person feel like the scum on the bottom of a boot.
It’s been a hard year. I haven’t really posted about it because it’s a very sensitive topic that I really don’t talk about with many people. Suffice it to say I suffered a major loss and it had a major impact, as one would expect. So every now and then that sadness comes up and makes me feel bad, then I get stuck in my head and the spiral of self hatred and depression begins.
So I was feeling down and struggling with all of those delightful feelings. You know, like a fool. Luckily for me, I have a great girl in my life that really helped me face these demons. You know, like a fucking hero.
But I had to open up. And that is hard for me to do. Like so many others, I have been conditioned to think that my thoughts and feelings aren’t important and to just keep it to myself. And on the rare occasion that someone gets me to open up, they’ve found some way to manipulate it and use it against me. Emotional torture at its finest.
But I took a leap of faith into the awaiting arms of an almost angelic little slut that made it seem so easy. I was open and vulnerable in a way that I hadn’t been in a long time. I’m not ashamed to say I cried a little. Or a lot. May be ashamed to admit I cried a lot.
She talked and talked, saying things that made all of the pain, fears, and doubts disappear. How did this amazing woman accomplish such a feat? I have no fucking clue. If she told me I was twenty feet tall and made of nipples, I would have believed her.
I think the genuine concern and care she displayed is what did it. There was no selfish intent, she wasn’t looking for ways to use me against me. She legitimately wanted to help, to make the fears subside, to make sure I knew that I wasn’t alone and didn’t have to face it all by myself.
I opened up to this girl in ways that left me feeling so exposed and vulnerable. I felt like she could see my very soul. And I really liked it. After it was over at least. During, it was incredibly daunting and I was so scared. But it worked it. I feel so much closer to her after this. Score one for the good guys!
I know there wasn’t anything really kink related to this post. I’m saving that for my next post. After I was helped through my issues, I had to repay my slutty little angel with a bit of fun in a way she had never experienced it before. I think there will be a blog with some of that involved. Because, damnit, it was great!
Now I feel like I’m rambling. So have a great night, my dear loyal reader. And also, don’t forget to wash the hand gimp suits. They get sticky really easily.
