How do I stop overthinking when, most of the time, I am not aware that it is actually happening. I refer particularly to when I am in service to my Dom - but it happens during other aspects of my life too.
When I am in service to my Dom I just want to please him and do as I’m told. Sometimes, though, I start thinking about whether I am “performing” right or is my Dom tired and am I taking up too much of his time etc etc. while a lot of this is well intentioned, it is not my place to speculate or worry about anything apart from following instructions and giving him pleasure. Instead I start getting anxious and cautious and I lose my focus. In his wisdom, my Dom knows straight away when I have lost my “subspace” and I’m getting angst and self-doubt.
In real life too, overthinking leads to second-guessing and self-doubt. I also lose my ability to make decisions and I ignore instinct and lose the ability to be spontaneous.
When I am in true subspace, however, all thought leaves me and I become focused on the task at hand and giving utter devotion and service to my Master. I lose myself in submission. It is an amazing feeling where nothing else matters except for pleasing my Superior. Any worries or angst just disappear and I feel happy and contented and there is nowhere else I would rather be.
The true joy of submission is that it equips you for your daily life. Teaching you to be focused without second-guessing or doubting yourself. The secret is; be aware of the joy of submitting and being out of control and just focus on the task at hand and live for the moment.
I know all this sounds obvious and easy but to someone like me, it is very difficult, believe me! My Dom is always telling me to “just let go” easier said than done and something I really have to practice.