Lying, deceiving, conniving, tricked, swindled and bullshit. These are the things that hurt people and makes them weary of other people that they come in contact with. I know this because when I was much, much younger than I am now (over 30+ years ago), I used to do that very thing. Much has changed since then, including my philosophies. There's an old saying it takes a bullshit artist to know a bullshit artist. And I know this because I used to be one.
I say that to say this, if you know you're not meant to be in this lifestyle, and and you tell certain people that. Don't go around saying those things and then expect that certain people won't find out that that you're still engaging in the knowledge of the lifestyle. Because in the end, all you're really hurting is is yourself. Because if you're lying to yourself, you can lie to anyone.
And in my opinion that's something that absolutely will not be tolerated within the lifestyle.
In the words of Ice Cube..... "Yo better check yourself before yo wreck yourself."