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Feeding the soul

3 weeks ago. Mon 22 Oct 2018 09:22:51 PM IDT

3 weeks ago. Sat 20 Oct 2018 04:08:13 AM IDT

4 weeks ago. Sun 14 Oct 2018 04:58:32 PM IDT

Disclaimer : Those are not my words , not my creation , I've read this post so many times and completely convinced with every word in it , except that I am not a sub , and these words are meant for subs to read , so I am posting it here , making it available for all subs on thecage , please read it , and let me know if you found it so fucking great , or not :)

 

You’ll Never Find the Perfect Dominant

Posted on August 18, 2015 by Sinclair Sexsmith

link to original post : https://www.sugarbutch.net/2015/08/perfect-dominant/

 

You’re right: You won’t ever find a dominant who is your most perfect match.

If you listen way down deep, there’s a voice telling you that. You have very particular needs, desires, cravings, and your submission is demanding, sometimes feeling endless. You want and want and want, and who can fill that up with anything that leaves a mark?

You won’t ever find someone as good as your ex. You won’t ever find someone as good as the person who introduced you to submission, who whispered those most perfect dirty things in your ear and told you to get on your knees.

You will come on too strong to the next sexiest person you’ve ever seen and they will whisper to their friends about how much you “aren’t a real submissive” or are “topping from the bottom.” You are too much. Too big. Too thick. Too mouthy. Too bratty. You will never get your needs met.

You will never find someone who matches your particular specialties in submission, your unique perspectives on service and masochism and giving over your body and will and all the dirt under your fingernails. Your dirty hands are too dirty. Your dirty mind is too dirty.

Your next dominant just wants to sit on the couch and have you pour more wine, and where does that leave you? You have to wait, to beg, to crave touch, to sit still with skin hunger that may feel like it will devour you, to be disappointed.

You won’t find the perfect dominant for you.

Unless you Do The Work.

Look at the parts of yourself that are yours and only yours. Excavate some of those unknown places until you can see around them and know why they’re there. Acknowledge what it is that you want and what it is you just won’t settle for, and you will have a much better chance to find (and be) the right partner.

Until you know what you want, you may not find it. Until you look deep at your part in your patterns, you will probably keep repeating them. Until you fill your own holes, you may continue to have a bottomless pit of desire and need that you think can only be filled by another person. Define your own cosmology of icons and worship and desire. Define your own dictionary of touch and connection and intimacy. Write the perfect love letter to the universe detailing all of the amazing things you secretly wish hope dream for in a lover and mail it off on the wind to fall and float down a waterfall. You can do it. You have wells of untapped strength.

Submissives are the strongest people I know.

Your demands are reasonable. Your desires are reasonable. Your wants are reasonable. Your unique particular weirdo gender is reasonable, and beautiful. Your too-much-ness is exactly the reason why you will be wanted, why you will be craved when you are not around, why someone who doesn’t even know you is craving you right now.

There is nothing wrong with you, or with the kind of submission that you most secretly, way down in your bones, seek.

I do actually believe that. But you have to believe it, too.

And then you have to go after it, with such vigilance that you won’t accept no for an answer, and your own no is an eager blade to get anything not serving your journey out of the way. Take up arms. Take up protest. Take up your favorite friends as armor, as council, as confidants. Take up your rightful space in the room. Take more dessert than you were served. Take the most amazing gift of yourself to the person who really could use it, right now, today.

Take the next step.

1 month ago. Fri 05 Oct 2018 04:05:37 PM IDT

If you were a king up there on your throne
would you be wise enough to let me go
for this queen you think you own
Wants to be a hunter again
wants to see the world alone again
to take a chance on life again
so let me go

1 month ago. Wed 03 Oct 2018 02:36:07 AM IDT

A high sex drive does not always mean that someone has hypersexual disorder. **

The professional community disagrees on where to draw the line between normal and abnormal sexual behavior.

To be diagnosed as someone with a hypersexual disorder, the person must have repeatedly experienced three or more of these criteria over a period of six months or longer:

  1. Not being able to complete goals, activities, or other obligations due to sexual fantasies or a preoccupation with sex.
  2. Using sexual fantasies as a way to escape from a boredom, anxiety, or depression.
  3. Using sexual fantasies to deal with stress.
  4. Having a hard time controlling sexual urges or behaviors.
  5. Harming others or putting others at risk of harm (physical or emotional) while responding to sexual urges.

If you live with a nymphomaniac, start by reassuring your partner that you are sexually attracted to them and that you love all their affection. Then set boundaries by explaining that your sex drive is not as high as theirs, so you can’t keep having sex multiple times a day. Encourage your partner to find non-sexual outlets , Build emotional intimacy, Consider other ways of meeting your partner’s needs, If you are comfortable with masturbation, consider giving your partner the green light for regular masturbation to help make up for the times you are not in the mood for sex.

** Quoted from wikihow site .

1 month ago. Wed 26 Sep 2018 05:38:46 PM IDT

You are not a dom or sub , you are vanilla with a kink , and you want to be a dom or a sub. 
That's fine , you have the right to explore and try to learn.

Well , still, there are steps , you gotta read , befriend with people from the lifestyle , spend some time watching , observing , asking , learning .

You could probably be here for some online playing .

That is fine too , as long as you are finding others sharing you the same interest .

But the question is :

what are you putting in your profile ? what are you telling others about yourself in chats ?

You have said everything , except the truth ?  think again , be honest .

Don't be a liar , time wasting , manipulative , dishonest person .

Don't started your journey to your definite failure , and you are going to leave a lot of mess behind .
Hurting those who already got it genuinely , the real doms and subs , who might you manage to deceive and waste their valuable time and feelings .

Edited : to look less angry , as someone suggested :)

1 month ago. Sun 23 Sep 2018 06:41:36 AM IDT

I think you will like to listen to this SONG

2 months ago. Wed 12 Sep 2018 09:26:13 PM IDT

2 months ago. Tue 11 Sep 2018 04:12:54 PM IDT

This is Erotcia : special version , extended lyrics , perfectly remixed , feed back is appreciated

 

My name is Dita
I'll be your mistress tonight
I'll be your loved one darling
Turn off the light
I'll be your sorceress, your heart's magician
I'm not a witch, I'm a love technician

I'll be a guiding light in your darkest hour
I'm gonna change your life, I'm like a poison flower

Give it up, do as I say
Give it up and let me have my way
I'll give you love, I'll hit you like a truck
I'll give you love, I'll teach you how to

(Behind)

Erotic, erotic, put your hands all over my body
Erotic, erotic, put your hands all over my body
Erotic, erotic, put your hands all over my body
All over me, all over me, all over me, all over me

If I take you from behind
Push myself into your mind
When you least expect it
Will you try to reject it?
If I'm in charge and I treat you like a child
Will you let yourself go wild?
Let my mouth go where it wants to

Give it up, do as I say
Give it up and let me have my way
I'll give you love, I'll hit you like a truck
I'll give you love, I'll teach you how to

I'd like to put you in a trance, all over
Erotic, erotic, put your hands all over my body
Erotic, erotic, put your hands all over my body
Erotic, erotic, put your hands all over my body
Erotic, erotic

We could use the cage
I've got a lot of rope
I'm not full of rage
I'm full of hope
This is not a crime, and you're not on trial
Bend over baby, I'm gonna make you smile

Light the candles until they're nice and soft
And when they start to drip, I'm gonna get you off

Give it up, do as I say
Give it up and let me have my way
I'll give you love, I'll hit you like a truck
I'll give you love, I'll teach you how to

Erotic, erotic, put your hands all over my body
Erotic, erotic, put your hands all over my body
Erotic, erotic, put your hands all over my body
All over me, all over me, all over me, all over me

Once you put your hand in the flame
You can never be the same
There's a certain satisfaction
In a little bit of pain
I can see you understand
I can tell that you're the same
If you're afraid, well rise above
I only hurt the ones I love

Give it up, do as I say
Give it up and let me have my way
I'll give you love, I'll hit you like a truck
I'll give you love, I'll teach you how to

I'd like to put you in a trance, all over
Erotic, erotic, put your hands all over my body
Erotic, erotic, put your hands all over my body
Erotic, erotic, put your hands all over my body
Erotic, erotic

Erotica, romance
I'd like to put you in a trance
Erotica, romance
Put your hands all over my body

I don't think you know what pain is
I don't think you've gone that way
I could bring you so much pleasure
I'll come to you when you say
I know you want me
I'm not gonna hurt you
I'm not gonna hurt you, just close your eyes

Erotic, erotic, erotic, erotic (just close your eyes)
Erotic, erotic, erotic, put your hands all over my body

Erotic, erotic, put your hands all over my body
Erotic, erotic, put your hands all over my body
Erotic, erotic (erotica), put your hands all over my body
All over me

All over me, all over me
Erotica (give it up, give it up), romance,
I'd like to put you in a trance
Erotica (give it up, give it up), romance
I'd like to do a different kind of [dance]
Erotica (give it up, give it up), romance
I'd like to put you in a trance
Erotica, romance
Put your hands all over my body

Only the one that hurts you can make you feel better
Only the one that inflicts pain can take it away

Erotic (ca)