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Kitten's Ramblings

Stories, songs, and feelings
2 days ago. Sat 17 Aug 2019 04:17:43 PM IDT

If you've read some of my previous blogs, you'll know I'm not just a sub but also a little. She doesn't come out much, but when she's in the mood to play, it's full out play! 

This morning she has decided to be the queen of fairies. This of course entails the wearing of her tiara. (Which if you are a little and have access to Amazon check out The Enchanted Jewelry Shop. She does elven ear cuffs and tiaras. Beautiful!) So I am wearing my tiara along with corset and shorts. 

First thing I do every morning is take pictures for Sir. One of them has me kneeling and showing that I am wearing what he picked out. I love doing this because he gets to see me every day and I get to show off a little.

So this morning has me kneeling as my queen of fairies, which is right where I should be. For even a Queen has to kneel sometimes.

3 days ago. Fri 16 Aug 2019 04:21:27 PM IDT

I'll be honest, this is one I wrote a little while ago. As I'm writing this, I consider changing the point of view, but at the moment am a bit busy to do that. I hope everyone enjoys! 

 


I take my Kitten into the bedroom and throw her onto the bed. Her naked body bounces slightly, making her tits jiggle and her giggle slightly. Fuck, her beautiful body looks so sexy sprawled out on the bed, completely available to me. My cock hardens at that thought, all the alluring and mind blowing things I could do to her.
Kitten sees my cock hardening and licks her lips. I can tell what she’s going to ask before the words even come to her luscious lips. 

“May I suck you please Sir? I want to feel your cock in my mouth.” 

“No. Not tonight.” 

I lay down on my stomach and stare at her pussy, just inches from me. She’s already wet and more than willing. Fuck, her cunt looks so inviting. So fucking wet, yet she hasn’t cum. I growl thinking of how fucking wet I’ll make her. 

“I want that pussy on my mouth. I want to taste you and hear you scream while I make you cum.”

I hear her sharp intake of breath as she lays down and spreads her legs wider. 

“Oh yes Sir. Please, take all of me. I’m yours to do with as you want.”
I moan at her words and move closer to her. Her bare pussy is open to my view, for me to do as I want. I kiss right at the top of her pussy, just above her clit. I hear her moan as I continue kissing all around, but purposefully not touching that ever so sensitive bundle of nerves. 

I hear more than see her grab at the sheets, the rustling of the fabric in sync with the noises coming from deep in her throat. 

I gently press my lips against her clit and moan, making sure every vibration hits her clit. She yells out, her hips starting to buck and lift as her fists curl even tighter in the sheets. I pull back before she can cum and kiss slowly on the outside of her lips, careful to let her calm a bit. 

“Oh fuck Sir that feels… damn so good.”
“Yes you do Kitten. Now, I want to try something. I’m going to spell something on this little button here using just my tongue. You can’t cum unless you guess all five words.” 

“Yes Sir.”
“Good. Let’s start.”
I place the tip of my tongue at the top of her clit, then slowly spell out the word ‘Sir’. It’s a very easy sentence and I know she’ll guess it: Sir please let me cum. But I want her begging for release and know this will accomplish just that. 

“Mmmm….. That word’s Sir.” 

“Very good Kitten. Let’s do this one.”
I spell out please, going slowly to “make sure she can guess”. Or that’s what I tell her. I know that I want to really make her pleasure that much more enjoyable. And drive her closer to that edge.

“Ohh… please. Word’s please.”
“You’re doing very well Kitten. Next one.”
I spell out let quickly. I hear her gasp at the speed and watch her try and think quickly about it.
“Let, the word’s let.”
“Correct. Next one.”
I also quickly spell the next word: me. Her hips jump at the touches, my tongue accentuating the downward bumps on the m, making her moan out. 

“Me Sir. It’s me.”
“Mmmm…. Certainly is all you Kitten.” I tease her pussy, circling her opening with a finger. She moans out louder and her hips follow my finger. 

“Last word Kitten.”
I spell out cum, exaggerating the letters so she can feel the letters fully. She moans out loud and grabs the sheets harder.
“Oh fuck Sir, the word is cum.”
“So what did I spell?”
“Please Sir let me cum!” 

“Do you want to right now?”
“Yes please Sir.”
“Wait. I want to feel you in my mouth.”
I stick my tongue deep into her cunt, licking around and fucking her while my finger plays with her clit. She yells out, hips bucking.

“Please Sir. Please may I cum now?”
“Mmm… yes Kitten cum now.”
She screams out, cumming hard on my mouth. Her hands are tight around the sheets, hips bucking harder and harder against my mouth. 

“Oh fuck Sir! God, this feels so good. Please, oh please…. Oh shit I’m cumming harder Sir! Oh fuck!" 

Hearing her say that is music to my ears. Knowing how much pleasure I’m giving and knowing that she’s letting her feelings go sounds so beautiful. Plus seeing her sexy body convulsing looks so sexy.

 

 


After she comes down from her orgasm, my Kitten smiles up at me. 

“Thank you Sir. That felt so amazing. Your lips on mine, your tongue teasing my clit. Mmmm…. It felt wonderful. One of the hardest orgasms I’ve had.”

4 days ago. Thu 15 Aug 2019 06:02:17 PM IDT

Forgive me if this rambles a bit. It's first day of school, I'm not working and instead I'm relaxing. 

This kinda came to me yesterday, but really took root this morning. How do you know you've found your "unicorn"? And, more importantly, how do you FIND said unicorn?

In high school I had many awesome teachers, but one answered this question (though not in regards to a D/s dynamic. Hers was for marriage). 

When she was in high school, she dated A LOT. Not only that, but she only went on 1 or 2 dates with most guys. Why? She didn't want to waste her time with someone who didn't feel right. But when she met her husband in college (yes, she continued the practice into college), she held tight and didn't let go.

My two thoughts when she said this were "Wow, that is great love story." and "But couldn't one of the others have been good too?"

But that was her point. She didn't want "good". She wanted her ONE. The ONE she believed (and if still alive, still believes) God had chosen just for her. 

I am a firm believer in soul mates, though my view is a bit different than some. This is where I may ramble a bit lol.

In my opinion, everyone has a soul mate. How many you have can change. Here's why.

For me, I have two major sides to my life: my vanilla and my sub/little. Since there are two major sides, I have two soulmates for "romance" (husband and Sir, though Sir is not physically here). I also have my sister and best friend, who are soul mates as friends. So four different soulmates.

"But what about finding a soulmate who is vanilla AND D/s?"

That is absolutely possible. And if you can, something to strive for. 

Now, there is one more person I have who is close to me, but not a soulmate. My cousin is also in the lifestyle as a sub. I don't believe she has someone atm but that's not the point. My cousin has always been my outside conscious and speaker of my curiosities, even though I didn't realize until recently. Let me explain better.

When I was younger I had a weird relationship with my cousin. Yvette (not her name, but there are multiple people so easier to use names) considered me like a younger sister while I felt more in common to her older sister Sami. Sami and I talked a lot and she helped me. But I usually avoided Yvette. I found her a bit strange and didn't relate to her.

Fast forward to last year. We were talking and Yvette mentions that she's a sub andshe was in a poly relationship with her ex. I had already been wondering about D/s, so I asked her some questions. I realize that this isn't something I could have talked to Sami about (she's more private) but Yvette loves talking about her lifestyle (when I was 14 she mentioned I should find a guy with tongue ring. Said that the barbell felt great along her tongue and then mentioned other places. Very interesting but NOT something a 14 year old needs to know about a cousin btw). 

So my cousin Yvette is like my private self, but outside. She is the person I SHOULD have talked to more, but didn't because "Those are not proper thoughts for a young lady" (gotta love Catholic Schools 🙄). 

So in conclusion to all this rambling, just because you have had multiple Doms or subs (my Sir is 5th Dom. Lucky number 5 😍😊) doesn't mean anything. All it means is that you are still looking for your ONE.

5 days ago. Wed 14 Aug 2019 02:55:49 PM IDT

There have been a few posts recently that really get under my skin. I won't point fingers or name names because, as the title says I am behaving, but honestly trying to say someone is something and then doing the EXACT same thing completely nullifies your point. Or complaining about something when you are new is nothing but plain rude to the rest of us.

With that being said, I wish everyone a happy hump day! Almost Friday!! 😊😊

5 days ago. Wed 14 Aug 2019 05:16:45 AM IDT

Yesterday I was tasked to color a picture. This is hardly the first time, though the wording caught my attention. I was to color a beautiful woman. 

My first thought was to search my mermaid coloring book for the perfect picture. Now while I picked a pretty picture, it wasn't what I wanted to show. 
"But mermaids ARE beautiful Kitten!"
Yes they are. I agree 100%. But for me, the full female form is beautiful. So I was disappointed that none of my remaining pictures hinted at nudity.
Well, I colored the one closest to what I wanted and that was still beautiful, then went in search of coloring pages that had nude forms. And boy do they have a lot 😈😊
I was and wasn't surprise to see many from Pinterest. Plus, all the pictures are absolutely stunning. Everything from slight nudity (covering privates with either cloth or handes) or full nudity (though front part of woman not shown in all glory).
The best part? They are free! Download to my phone, print off printer and BOOM! New coloring page 😁😁 

I now have a collection of coloring pages saved on my phone and Pinterest, ready and waiting to be colored. Even found a few interesting ones showing couples engaged in interesting positions 😉 And one or two bondage ones 😁

My little and sub are thrilled 😊😊❤❤❤

5 days ago. Wed 14 Aug 2019 02:10:10 AM IDT

My collar came in today!! I absolutely love it and couldn't be happier 😁😁😁 

Thank you Sir for considering me worthy of a collar 😘😘😘😘😘

 

1 week ago. Mon 12 Aug 2019 03:00:18 PM IDT

Yesterday was Sunday, which for me means church. I've become much better at going to church. I don't try to "get out" of going, as I did when I was younger. Maybe it's the fact it's a different church (Mormon instead of Catholic) or maybe I've grown up (doubt that one lol), but I mostly enjoy church. I'd enjoy it more if I didn't have to wake up early, but that's me.

So what does this have to do with BDSM? A quote I heard resounded in me for many reasons, one involving this lifestyle.

"Everyone's perfect is different."

Now I KNOW the speaker was not thinking about ties, floggers and polyamorous relationships when saying this (she was quoting a friend who was in the temple asking how to handle her life), but it is something everyone needs to consider.

"Everyone's perfect is different."

Just because I'm in a ldr with my Sir and don't see that changing, doesn't make it any less real than someone who lives with their Dom. Just because someone doesn't want a sexual relationship doesn't mean they aren't a sub or Dom. Each dynamic is unique. Each dynamic is different.

"Everyone's perfect is different."

I came to this site 15 months ago because I wanted to learn more about BDSM  and find what I was missing. I found that and more.

I've met people all over this world with many different kinks. I've talked about the different kinks and what each person enjoys. But more importantly I found a passion I didn't know I was missing.

But I've also seen much pain and hurt. I've seen friends leave and sometimes not return. Because they were hurt by what was said.

"Everyone's perfect is different."

1 week ago. Mon 12 Aug 2019 03:25:39 AM IDT

Again, something I wrote for my blogger and thought I'd post here. Any feedback appreciated 😊

 

This is something that has been going through my mind since I took my journey 15 months ago. What do I think BDSM is? What kind of submissive am I? How much control do I want to give up? What is acceptable as "pain"? Will this affect my vanilla life? How much will it affect it? I thought it would be a good idea to explain some of these questions for new subs. I will be answering these questions in order with my opinion and feelings. If you have questions or comments, please leave them 😊

First, what do I think BDSM is. I can give you the cookie cutter answer with what the acronym stands for, but that doesn't teach, so I'll be more personal. I've found I need to give up control. I need to have someone tell me what is best for me and know there are consequences. On top of that, I love having someone determine when and if I can cum. There was a blog on cage that said good girls don't cum without permission. Honestly that's me in a nutshell. But back on track. BDSM is about trust, love, devotion and caring. I give my all to my Sir and he molds me into a better me. He gives me what I need and in return I please him in all ways.

What kind of submissive am I?

This has been a hard question to answer as I feel I'm a multitude of things. I know I'm submissive. I have tried being a Domme and don't like it. I need to please and submit, not dominate.

I know I have a little side. She doesn't come out often but she's there. I don't think I'm so much a brat as I am a princess with a masochistic side 😈 She would enjoy sticking her tongue out at my Sir and has taken pictures that were not what he meant ("spicy picture" became jalapenos and "saucy picture" was BBQ sauce).

I think I might be a little bit slave. I hesitate on that, more because I'm afraid of giving up that much control than because I don't want to. I don't think I could do 24/7, especially now with young children. So I don't go by slave.

How much control do I want to give up?

This has also been hard. My heart says everything. That the only way to be involved in a dynamic is to jump in the deep end. My head stops my heart most of the time. Right now, I'm working with my Sir to slowly give up more control. So far I have to update on what I eat, add lunges to my exercise, let him pick out my outfits and not cum without permission plus daily journal. He also gives me daily tasks and if I want to do major changes (hair cut, hair dye, etc) I have to discuss with him first. I have been in dynamics where I gave up more control (got in trouble once for putting nail polish on without asking. Wasn't punished because that hadn't been discussed, but had to take off immediately which was a pain). I've also been in a dynamic where there wasn't any control except when to cum and sending pictures. I much prefer an in between.

What is acceptable "pain"?

This worried me the most. All I could picture was harsh nipple clamps, whips, belts, and me being bruised and hurt. Granted I knew this wouldn't be in person, but I also want to serve so I would do as ordered. I had a very good Dom introduce pain slowly. How slowly? Sometimes it seemed like millimeters lol. Since I didn't have nipple clamps (do now), he used clothespins. It would be put those on nipples first for 10 minutes, then 20 and so on. That was actually a lot of fun. Though have found nipple clamps are easier. He also introduced me to smacking myself with my collar till my breasts were red. Again, done slowly. If I told him I didn't like it, we stopped. The next Dom I had introduced me to different pain. His still involved the collar, but also brought in belt and spoon. I found with him limits with smacking myself below my waist. My Sir also showed me that putting Biofreeze on clit hurts 😊😈 (and yes, this is little's way of teasing).

What vanilla people don't understand is that pain is what you make of it. Yes, a belt hurts. But if you slowly bring it into the bedroom, it can be pleasurable. Or not. There are plenty of subs who don't want pain. I enjoy it because it gives me release. Not sexually, though that is there, but I know the pain is coming, that unless I safe word there isn't anything to do about it, and it release my stress from "What do I do?". There is no flight or fight, just relaxation. Also, knowing that if I safeword I can stop everything is reassuring. That my Sir will listen without question to my word.

Will this affect my vanilla life

How much will it affect it

These two go together and have the same answer. It affects your vanilla life however you want it to. Personally I keep as much apart from my vanilla as I can. Why? I have 3 children under 16 and a husband. I don't want to do something that will affect them badly. My Sir knows and understands this. While he isn't at the top of my list, he is right with my husband (God and kids first). What does that mean? Exactly what it says. I listen to my husband and Sir equally. That unless something major happened *knock on wood it doesn't* I do what my Sir says and keep him as informed on everything as I would my husband.

This is what I think of when I think of BDSM. If you have any questions or comments, please feel free to ask or leave a comment 😊

 

1 week ago. Fri 09 Aug 2019 11:44:08 PM IDT

This came to me after reading another post here. I wrote first on my outside blog, but then decided that it would be good to share here as well. 

This is a bit off topic, but not really. A blog I read recently talked about feminism and how we as a society don't need it. I turned red over this and let me explain why.

For me, feminism is being treated as equal to a man, with regards to public life. For me that means equal pay, equal rights and equal treatment. Don't look at me when I bring a car in to have a tire changed and think you can take 4 hours to change 4 tires. I'm not stupid, I know how to change a tire and I know it doesn't take an hour each one. And yes, I had that happen to me. I also spread word around town to NEVER go there and they closed within two months.
On the flip side, feminism also means treating men as equals. Knowing that they can do things just as well as a woman, whether that be taking care of kids as stay at home dad or being an interior designer. 
Another, more important part, is to not lose chilvary or straight up politeness while being a feminist. Gentlemen should hold doors open for women, pay for dates if they invited the woman out, and treat the woman like the special woman she is.

"But Kitten, this has NOTHING to do with BDSM." 

Oh ye of little faith. Of course chilvary and feminism have a place in BDSM. Let me explain.

Chilvary has a few definitions, so I'm going to use the historical one. That definition is the combination of qualities expected of an ideal knight, especially courage, honor, courtesy, justice and a readiness to help the weak (oxford dictionary).

Now this code was for knights, and knights were male, so TECHNICALLY  chilvary doesn't apply to females. However, for the purposes of BDSM, these qualities do apply to Dommes. But I will be using the male pronouns, so if you are a Domme, just change the pronoun please.

 First quality is courage. As a Dom, you have to have the courage to face your sub/little/slave's issues head on. Whether that is something simple like missing you or something big like hurt feelings or trust issues, you need to be strong and courageous against the sub's issues. 

Next is honor. For me, this means being truthful, not abusing your sub and not taking advantage of your sub. These are VERY important as, without trust, you have no relationship.

Courtesy is also very big and one that is forgotten. This can be anything from not sending unwanted dick picks to subs that aren't yours, to simply holding the door for your sub. It shows respect, affection and esteem.

Justice is the next quality. What comes to my mind is punishment for a wrong. If you punish a small infraction (like forgetting to write a journal) as major and demand 20 lashes with a belt, you will quickly lose your sub. Like, that second lose the sub. S/He is running out the door screaming. If not, allow me to talk to the sub so we can discuss that.

Lastly is a readiness to help the weak. Now, subs are NOT weak. I am in no way stating that. Subs are super strong. Don't believe me, give up all your power to someone and see how much strength that takes. But a Dom helps a sub become BETTER. He takes the strength, any issues and everything the sub has, then makes her/him better. THAT is the readiness to help the weak.

But during all this, the sub is also doing the same. S/he has courage to give her everything, honor in making sure to be truthful, courtesy by doing as ordered and addressing your Dom politely, justice by understanding that even Doms have off days and need a break, and readiness to help your Dom no matter what, however you can, even if s/he doesn't want it. 

1 week ago. Fri 09 Aug 2019 07:25:11 PM IDT

That one word makes me smile and calms my mind. 

Why? Because I only think of one thing when I say or hear it like that: my Sir.

Last year, when I started this journey, I didn't want to use "sir" to describe a Dom who I submitted to. I thought it wouldn't have as much meaning to me, since I say "Yes sir" so much at work (same for "Yes ma'am" in case wondering).

But with Sir, it's different. I can hear a different tone, different respect for him than random person number 178 on phone. Which is of course how it should be.

In the past I've used Master with most Doms and with one Daddy. But with my Sir, that title encompasses all of it. I am his sub, his little, just plain his. He pushes me, assures me and makes me feel special, like a Dom should.