3 Is Right

Thoughts on D/s and our journey.
10 hours ago. Wed 15 Aug 2018 09:16:36 PM IDT

Trust me, I’ve said a million times I wouldn’t make this choice to be submissive.  I mean that, too. I hate that sinking feeling when you can’t stand how pathetic you feel because someone rejected you or you couldn’t make someone happy. But those aren’t my topics today. Today, I will let you in on a secret. I can’t stay mad. Sounds innocent enough, right? Almost sounds sweet, kind, loving, something to strive for, perhaps? It is not!

What happens is this; I get very angry and hurt and cry and feel like such a failure and a bad person. I know I need to move away from that person. And I am determined to do that. It is definitely set in my mind. I am done trying with that person. Finished. It’s a good thing. It stops toxicity in my life. Stops the emotional roller coaster, stops the pain. (Are you with me so far?) All good. The pain stopped, toxic people cut out. Life goes on.

Except this happens: the toxic person is nice. They are sweet, not even remorseful, but nice enough. And poof,s all of the anger, pain, and hurt goes away. I question why I felt so badly in the first place. And faster than a tire change, they are back in my life. I have forgiven them. I am happy and all of the anger and pain is gone. Sounds great still right?  It’s far from it. These are exactly the abusive, narcissistic people that I, as a submissive woman, need to stay away from in my life. I don’t stay away from them, in an almost childlike innocence, not only forgive but nearly erase all the anger, pain and hurt. And I push the reset button. Poof, you get another chance, one to be the person I need you to be, but more than likely, one more chance to hurt me all over again.  This makes me feel very ambiguous, one part of me is thrilled you are happy and nice to me, the other part of me feels stupid, embarrassed and humiliated that I allowed you to come back and you don’t truly deserve it.

So in the grand scheme of things I dislike about being submissive, that ranks high on my list as one of the things I dislike the most. It seems to have something to do with my little because she is the most forgiving sweet thing or the angriest little demon.  She is far from perfect and far from the ideal little And yet, daddy loves her regardless, (which says a lot about him.)

I love you, daddy,

Yours, Always and Forever,

Sugar

1 week ago. Tue 07 Aug 2018 08:20:42 AM IDT

I have read a lot of things about Daddy Doms. I have read about what they are like, what they expect of their babygirls, some of the characterizations of a daddy. I have written about my relationship with my daddy. He has written about some of the trials and tribulations of having a little as a submissive. I have read all about Daddies and what I read tonight said it best. It was amazing to realize it. And I could not have said it better. Paraphrasing from DaddyKnight's Blog Post What is a Daddy Dom, and How to Treat Your (Adult) Little Girl: A Dominant is as long as a Dominant is wanted. A Master is as long as a Master while Mastery is wanted. But a Daddy is a Daddy to his baby girl forever. You do not ever enter a Daddy/babygirl relationship lightly. It’s not something you do on a whim. If you are a Daddy or a babygirl, choose wisely. Make your choices seriously. I know it’s a lot of fun and games in the beginning, but as Daddy has written, it’s like a pencil, sometimes it gets dull and annoying.

My Daddy named my little. She’s his. One hundred percent his. He identified her age, He did not however make her that age. He didn’t change her in anyway. He identified her. He made her real. Much like the Velveteen Rabbit. She became real from being loved and known, I have other sides to me besides my little. I am a mommy and a vanilla grow ass adult. I work, have kids, I function as a normal woman. I have a master’s degree, I’m not mentally ill. I have a masochistic side and a need to be cuddled as well. I have had issues, I probably always will, but the fact remains I am not unlike many people on this earth with a little inside of them who just don’t have them identified! We all know that person who sometimes is like a 16 year old. Maybe, they just have a little inside of them. Maybe they haven’t truly grown up. I don’t know, but I know that if you find yourself with a little, it’s very difficult  to let them go.

A Little is a little forever, but not all the time. A Daddy is Daddy to his little forever.

Daddy always tells me that, but until I read it, it didn’t truly make any sense. Now I see what he meant.

So if you are a Daddy or a Mommy Dom/me, choose well but understand, you don’t toss away a baby girl/boy. You keep them and help them and accept them for who they are. Guide them and nurture them . They are yours. Forever and a Day.

Daddy, I am yours, always and forever. I am one of the lucky ones. I have my forever Daddy.

My love and devotion,

Sugar (and Sophie!)

1 week ago. Sun 05 Aug 2018 10:48:16 PM IDT

I am afraid I get many emails on The Cage and other sites, from men. Men who say in their profile they are submissive, then when they email they say they are dominants. Or Men who are dominants who say they would love to see "all of me." Its rather humorous. I can't tell you how many men want to chat about sex. Cyber sex. I know it's the year 2018, yet people still wish to "get off" using the internet chats. I don't understand it really. I am not your masturbation troll doll. I am not here to be your fantasy woman. I am a real, loving, caring, and attentive submissive woman who has a dominant man in her life. I love to educate, to help newer submissives find their way. To assist dominants in learning how a submissives mind works, but more importantly to learn about each other-all of us, Dominants and submissives alike.

I don't wish to sound stuffy, or prudish. Damn, I'm far from that. If you wish to discuss sex in a non-"get me off" way? I'm more than happy to have that conversation. If you wish to ask about something I've written about? Have at it! If you want to know what it's like to have a 3 some with a man and a woman? Again, ask away! But for goodness sake, don't show me a dick picture and think I'm going to cum in my pants! It's silliness. I've seen many penises in my life. It's not necessary to show me your big hard dick. I can assure you I've seen one before. 

I am sure other women here can attest to this same behavior. I am also sure there are some women who simply do love the attention. It's shallow and non committal, and that isn't always bad. It's fun at times, but I am just in a much deeper relationship. I don't find it at all appealing, at this time in my life. I want real time, real people interactions. And I have that in my life right now.

I have been given permission by my dominant to talk to anyone I'd like. It's just not as fun to do silly games when I have someone to play with real time! He's a sexy beast of a man whom I adore.

Sorry for the rant! I am devoted to teaching and learning at this time. Feel free to ask me anything, just keep the cyber bs to a minimum.

Love you, Daddy,

 

Sugar

1 week ago. Sun 05 Aug 2018 09:39:28 PM IDT

In the world of littles, I read a lot about role play. I don’t happen to agree with that term. When my little comes out, I’m not role playing anything. I’m not pretending to be 12. I am 12! I find the same things funny a 12 year old finds funny. I cry like a 12 year old. I dance around like a 12 year old. I’m insecure like a 12 year old. Simply put – I am 12.

I can’t tell you why that happens. I don’t know why. Something in my psyche reverts to a time in my life where I am 12. I wish it were studied more. My daddy can conjure her up quickly. When I am with friends laughing and joking I can become 12 again. I’m not always 12, however; sometimes I am quite grown up. That mommy in me feels just as real as my little. I am a mommy. I protect, I nurture, I spoil and I make sure all is right in everyone I love’s world.

Sexually, I can flip flop. I can be a naughty 12 year old or a vampy submissive. I can be a tad masochistic or a soft sensual romantic at times.  It depends on what mood I am enticed into at that time. Always though the one thread of me that is in all of my alter egos is pleasing. I love to please those I am with. It’s where my own pleasure stems from within my body. The more you are pleased, the happier I am. And the more turned on you are, the more I intense I am, if it’s a sexually charged time.

I am saying all of this because I am finding website after website talking about littles role playing. Sort of disheartening when you feel 12, you are 12 and you are actually confused by what they mean by role play. When you write about littles, I understand there may be littles that do roleplay, try to differentiate between us, please. The lumping us as “role players” is annoying.

I admit I am more fragile, more work, more sensitive, more needy at times, just more! I don’t love or hate being a little, it’s simply who I am. It changes. I actually asked daddy this question, “Why didn’t I grow up all the way?” ( His answer was simply - kiss ) I guess it was something that just didn’t develop normally in me. Something that wasn’t allowed to become grown up or forced to grow up too early. I am not quite sure of the reasons why, but I am quite positive there are 2 distinct people inhabiting this body. And one of them is 12.  Sophie (my 12 year old’s name) and Mommy love our daddy very, very much. Bigger than the wild wide world!

With love and devotion,

Sugar

2 weeks ago. Tue 31 Jul 2018 10:45:30 AM IDT

I will admit my little Sophie (my 12 Year Old Self) is a pain in the ass sometimes. She is a pain to me as well as everyone else. She is demanding, emotional, and drama filled. Daddy gets very upset with her and I realized I needed to control her. I find it hard to do. It’s never easy. I now stop and think a bit more. I try to calm down. I try to take hours to cool off. I don’t jump to conclusions but it’s not always easy.

I also talk to others and ask her opinion. I try to get it out of my system before spouting out drama to daddy. I love him so very much, it’s extremely scary to Sophie that she will be bad and make daddy leave her. It makes me cry and I try very hard to not have her react negatively. Daddy and I come with some heavy baggage and both of us have abandonment issues. I know that I’m not always easy, and sometimes daddy isn’t either!

What am I doing to control Sophie’s meltdowns? 1.I stop and think before I speak to Daddy. 2. I take a few hours before I talk to Daddy. Cool off and try hard to see his side is the story. 3. I talk it over with a "sister" and see what she thinks. 4. I cry. Yes it helps me release a lot of my emotions and I get out all of my anger, fear or pain. 5. I redirect my anger, fear or pain to something else, such as; playing online games, watching TV, reading or even writing in this blog. 6. I sleep on it. It does me a world of good. I often dream of my fears and how to handle my emotions. 7. I tell Daddy I'm upset as calmly and unemotionally as I can muster it. He does understand and tries hard not to grin at how silly I sound. 8. I put myself in Daddy's shoes for a little. What it must be like in his world looking at mine. Helps me understand him better and I calm down usually.

I try extremely hard to squelch my outbursts. It’s very difficult for me. I come from a very loud Italian background and it’s always been an upheaval and impulsive responses to things. I am trying as hard as a little can try. Unfortunately, I don’t always succeed, I can only hope to make the span between outbursts longer and longer. And maybe pray that God gives Daddy the patience to not lose his love for me because of them.

I am sure you were thinking that controling a little was something Daddy needed to do, but alas, it's something only I can do. Chasing away unreal thoughts and fears can't be done by anyone but yourself, I'm afraid. Daddy can reassure me 10,000 times, but it is my head that needs to accept it.

I love you Daddy, with all my heart and soul.

Yours, Always and Forever,

Sugar

2 weeks ago. Tue 31 Jul 2018 10:30:41 AM IDT

Not all gifts are of the kind you can buy. I have known that for a long time. A good dominant will give you things that you can't buy and can't do for yourself. He can make you feel special, he can make you feel important to him. You can have very good self-esteem, but when someone makes you feel  special. It's like a special dessert on top of the very scrumptious meal.

Some submissives thrive on humiliation, I'm not one of them. I have plenty of that in my life. Most of us do. I have a dominant who thrives on lifting me up, not putting me down. He has enough self-esteem that he doesn't need to make me look and feel smaller to make himself feel better. I, in turn, love to please him more. (Not meant to be a judgement on those who love humiliation) I want the best for him and that includes me. We are always trying to improve our relationship and ourselves.

Some of my gifts to him are protecting him or trying to do that. It isn't an easy job and believe me I get into trouble doing it. I love nurturing him as much as he loves nurturing me. What I believe some people miss totally is that a dominant is not out to just meet his own needs. He's out to take care of and nurture his submissive. I simply can't tell you how wonderful that feels.

I allow him to vent to me-about life, about his kids, about his other relationships. About anything truthfully. We are each other's best friends. We feel like a very worn and comfy pair of jeans. That is not to say either of us take for granted what we have. We do not. He is very cognizant of my needs and what is good for me, what I can handle and what I can not. If I don't think I can handle x, y, z, I tell him, either when he tells me or when I have had time to process that information. Once again a recurrent theme in all of my blogs is communication. I allow him to communicate with me. I try hard not to become upset about what he is whats to do or he is feeling. Am I always successful? Hardly, but I do not run. I don't hide, I don't retreat, I don't become vengeful. I simply talk about it or vent back to him or accept that this is something that is important to him.

There is a whole lot of love between us, and we do share that love. It's a very intimate moment when we do that. There is a look, a touch, a smile that is our unspoken connection that is often just incredible to witness. We are one, in our hearts and souls.

I simply adore you Daddy, and I know that I am loved and cared for in my life. I can smile and grin, knowing I am yours.

My love and devotion,

Sugar

3 weeks ago. Thu 26 Jul 2018 06:33:34 AM IDT

Trust…Hard to achieve and easy to break. It’s difficult and easy. It’s a matter of telling the truth, looking out for your Significant Other, and keeping your word. Those three things are directly related to how much someone trusts or doesn’t trust you. It may take some time to build up that trust. May take longer than you would like. You may have to “prove” yourself over and over. Great advice stays the course! Just keep doing those three things and don’t deviate. Never deviate, but in reality, you may never develop blind trust you desire with a person. You still shouldn’t deviate your course. It will be a testament to your character. You can’t ever truly control anyone but your own actions.

Sounds so very simple. Oh, it’s not. Fear of what they will think of you if you do something you don’t believe they will like, hard to anticipate their reaction- do something that they won’t approve of and poof trust is gone. Hard to give someone that amount of trust, as well. Personally, I come from a long line of people you can’t trust-a father, a husband and multiple partners along the way. So for me to trust Daddy is a very  big deal. He is very trustworthy with me. He tells me what he is going to do and if I happen to not to agree, we discuss. Of course, he has the final say and sometimes doesn’t heed my advice, but I do remind him (just like a 12-year-old) “I told you that was a bad idea!”

Sometimes, trust is knicked by being too emotional when you don’t like something. An example of this is if Daddy tells me something I don’t like. If I flip out and get emotional and angry, it says to him he can’t trust my reactions. I am working very hard on keeping things less emotional when I don’t like something. This brings me back to open communications. When I am scared or upset, I now communicate with Daddy more. I ask questions more calmly, I don’t get angry, or frightened. I also let him know I am afraid of _________. This allows him to put more trust in me and also me in him. I can say to him, it’s okay Daddy, I understand now and he is more willing to simply tell me and ask me if I have any questions.

Building trust is so difficult and all past relationships influence how long it takes us to build trust. Kayla Lords and John Brownstone from “Loving BDSM Podcasts” call them Bad Tapes. Those bad experiences color our new relationships and new experiences. We are scared, and it takes a lot of time, consistency and truths to build that blind trust needed so badly for solid relationships. It’s something you decide to work on together. You learn together. You have to see-saw back and forth until you know if the relationship can be trusted. At one point you have decisions to make.

You have to decide if this relationship is worthy of your blind trust. Some of them simply are not.  Some people are simply not worthy of your trusting them. They can’t be trusted. As a submissive, it is very hard to not need that level of trust. I can’t imagine not being able to trust my Daddy. I have had dominants that I shouldn’t have trusted but had. I know that it’s a requirement for me to be able to trust- and not just trust- trust blindly. To not even think that he would ever do anything to hurt me or to destroy the trust I have in him. Blind trust in BDSM is, in my opinion, a necessary part of the relationship. The dominants and the submissives lives can be at stake and the emotional piece can scar someone for life.

If I can say one piece of advice, it would be to choose well, be careful, watch out for red flags, but if all is well, begin to trust slowly and keep those lines of communication as open as you possibly can. Ask as many questions as you need to ask. Tell your dominant why you are asking them. Be calm, be secure and maybe, you’ll see that he is worthy of your blind trust.

Thank you, Daddy, for never getting angry at me for asking questions. For putting up with my “bad tapes”, for allowing me to have melt downs and helping me through them. We grow stronger every day due to your patience, my determination to learn to trust, your determination to help me be calmer and more secure.

I love you, always and forever,

Sugar

3 weeks ago. Tue 24 Jul 2018 06:22:26 AM IDT

So now we have a dominant man and a submissive woman (substitute any genders here) in a D/s relationship and anyone new could be thinking “okay what do I do now.” Just like when you start a new job, you are baffled and confused as to what your role should be. You don’t know how to do it and can’t figure out “the ropes” (pun intended.) So first and foremost, you have to have a dominant with a vision, a goal, and an understanding of what it is he wants. That vision must include the basic foundation of what is best for my submissive. What will strengthen our bond? What will improve her self-esteem? What will make her a better person? How can I help her become the woman I know she is capable of? What are the first steps to achieve this?

Hopefully, these answers come easily, even if they make you think hard. Why? Because if you can’t answer these questions easily, you may need to back up and start slower, start getting those answers before you consider being in a Dominant/submissive relationship. Take the time to know and understand each other first. It may seem like you’re being a turtle not getting to the finish line, but in reality, you’re honing your relationship to make it an easy transition. Think of it as a vacation airplane ride, sometimes you have to take a jumper plane first, then the jet to get there faster.

Now just because as the Dominant, you have a lot of responsibilities,  your submissive also has a bushel full. Submissives, your first job is weeding out the abusers, the wanna get-laid make-pretend doms, the ones who just aren’t compatible with you and the downright idiots whom you can’t possibly follow. Then you have to decide exactly what your hard limits are, your soft limits are and where you’d be comfortable starting. After that you need to do these things, Participate, Practice, Proactive, and Pay attention. Of the utmost importance is pay attention. I can’t stress that enough. PAY ATTENTION! If you are a good submissive, you will start out obeying orders. If you are a better one, you’ll do those orders without being told. A stellar submissive is one that anticipates her Doms wishes because she has paid attention. Practice paying attention, participate in his life know his likes and dislikes, be proactive in meeting his needs.

Both of you need to know that a BDSM relationship may not be the same as a D/s relationship.   A BDSM relationship could be as simple as being a top or a bottom at a play party. A D/s relationship is always much more than that. I am not saying one is better or worse than the other. One is definitely harder than the other though. It takes an abundance of work for both parties to have a successful D/s relationship, where the top/bottom may be more fun and enjoyable. Think of it as instant gratification vs long term joy, (at least for me.) You may not want the work a D/s relationship takes, or can’t do that for a million different reasons, that’s all fine. I have a deep desire to please and serve in the best way possible so being a bottom isn’t necessarily the answer for me.

One of the absolute most important things a Dom/sub must do for each other is to protect each other, at all costs. A D/s relationship is very fragile, think thin fine crystal. A few hard blows to that protection, and it’s irreplaceable. It is this protection and trust that bond you together. It keeps you grounded and able to weather a storm. Make sure that the communication, we talk about so much, is open and honest. It’s also one of the hardest things about D/s. it sounds easy but it’s far from it. It does work very effectively to glue you to your partner.

When Daddy and I began, it was a slow process, he taught me (and continues to teach me,) patience and that he has my best interest at heart. (Submissives, as a whole, are not known for their patience.) I taught him what true intimacy looked like, and what a deep rooted submissive resembles. I taught him that we are not always going to be perfect, that we make mistakes, that we are sensitive creatures with deep feelings. He’s the most kind, loving man I know and he continues to surprise me with his patience and love. We continue to grow and evolve into what makes him happy, which in turn makes me happy. I believe that we will continue this process of growth for many, many years to come. Our symbiotic relationship is one of much pleasure and joy, but as I have said many times, it takes work. It’s not always easy, but it is always worth it.

Thank you, Daddy, for showing me that I am yours and I have value in your life. I am your babygirl.

I love you, bigger than the whole wide world,

Sugar

 

 

3 weeks ago. Sun 22 Jul 2018 05:44:05 PM IDT

What makes any relationship a good one? I know there are many things that contribute to a good relationship. Some are basic chemistry, some are similar interests, some are easy, some are very difficult. One thing that sounds easy but can be difficult is good communication. Not the superficial communication that is so very common, the deeper level of communication that allows you to bring up any topic. I mean anything. Those dark thoughts you are embarrassed about, that silly thing that happened (possibly 40 years ago) that causes you to cry, the irrational fear that you have deep-seated within you. All those things you think at times you are so afraid to verbalize. A good dominant will always encourage you to be able to talk to him about anything. The reverse is also true. You, as his trusted submissive, will be able to have him tell you his deepest desires and fears. This is the crux of any good relationship, but it’s the most important part of a D/s one. If something is bothering me or my sister, it’s always okay to voice our concerns to Daddy. it’s never an inconvienence. Daddy may not always agree with us, and we may not always like the outcome of the conversation but we are never made to feel like we shouldn’t have brought it up.

Most relationships need some semblance of consistency. A submissive cannot exist without it, nor can a dominant. It is imperative that this relationship has its roles and protocols as consistent as possible. There are more rules and a deeper sense of respect in a D/s relationship. I know I am never to be disrespectful. I also know that if Daddy tells me he’s going to do something, he does it. So I, in turn also pay attention and do what I have promised. It’s a relationship based on consistency and respect. I can’t imagine what it’s like to be in a D/s relationship without a dominant that is consistent. He expects certain things from us and he deserves to get them. We expect his time and attention to us and we always get that as well. Our commitment to each other is consistent. No matter what happens, we know we can rely on each other.

Another necessary thing for a D/s relationship is trust. Without trust, there can be no D/s relationship. You must always trust that your partner will have your best interest at heart. Always. Not when it’s convenient or he thinks about it, or you decide you have a few extra minutes, always. Then there is remembering that he has your best interest at heart. It’s all about the trust. Once that is established, once that is engrained in your mind, most of the everyday drama starts to subside. It lessens dramatically. You can go to the communication and ask a difficult question because you know you can trust you won’t be belittled or scolded. I think I’ve asked the same types of questions 100 times and never has daddy gotten angry at me. I’ve been insecure and scared many times. Never has he gotten angry at that. Now when I am disrespectful, he will get angry. But for me, that anger is never abusive. It’s never directed to hurt or belittle my feelings. He brings back the conversation to trust.

Another important thing in a D/s relationship is the correlation of words and actions. Many times people say a lot of things. They tell you all types of things, you believe them until you stop and think. their actions say something totally different. In a D/s relationship that is something that is not acceptable. You need to trust and see the consistency of their words and actions. You are starting to see a pattern, where the things you need in a D/s relationship are intertwined. They can’t live separately without each other. The communication, consistency, trust, and alignment of words and actions are woven like threads into fabric. Take one of the threads out of the fabric, the entire cloth disintegrates.

So when you look at vanilla and D/s relationships, the same basic principals are needed to maintain a loving relationship, but in D/s relationship, it is intensified. It’s amplified or magnified to a higher level. There isn’t a real difference in what it takes, it’s in the amount that it takes. It’s imperative in a D/s relationship that you follow the ‘rules’ of your relationship.

I am one of the lucky women who has a kind, caring daddy who does his best to keep the lines of communication open, who encourages us to let him know if he’s not consistent, who demands a level of trust and whose words and actions match whenever humanly possible. He is not perfect, I am not perfect either. We are very unsettled when we have discord in our relationship of any kind. We don’t sleep well, we don’t feel in sync. Our symbiotic relationship seems out of whack. Luckily, it doesn’t happen all that often. It is happening even less frequently these days with less intensity. We are always growing. Isn’t that the way all great relationships should look? I believe that with all my heart.

I love you, Daddy, with my heart and soul. I enjoy all of our laughter, our banter. Our relationship is solid and secure. You have made me a very happy little submissive babygirl.

All my love,

Sugar

 

 

3 weeks ago. Sat 21 Jul 2018 01:07:16 AM IDT

So how do you protect yourself? I mean really protect you.  When you’re a new submissive meeting maybe your first dominant man after talking online, how do you make sure you actually come home in one piece? I am going to give you some tips and tricks I have used. And many are used in the community.

First, have someone who will know where you are. Don’t ever meet anyone without a trusted friend who doesn’t know where you are and what time you will contact them or they will contact you at a specific time. Use code words as well. So say have you heard from _____? As maybe a code phrase that you need help. Make sure you make some contact with them to say to I’m okay or I need help at a specific time. This works well and keeps you safe.

Secondly, never meet in private or in a desolate place. If your dominant-to-be doesn’t like that, run as fast as you can. Why? Because first and foremost he must always have your best interest at heart. If he wouldn’t allow his sister or daughter to meet someone there, he shouldn’t want you to either.

Thirdly, I never play on the first meeting. Never. Ever. Many people may not have this rule but being my submissive self, I get into trouble when I break this rule. I always let my dominant-to-be know this. See rule 2 if he disagrees. You have time. You’re not going to disappear in a minute. Coffee or a drink, maybe even dinner or lunch is fine but keep it shorter and simple. Gives you much-needed processing time to see how you truly feel.

In addition, talk to them. Ask questions. Get to really know them. Find out what they like to eat, their favorite teams, what is the oddest thing they ever encountered, and my favorite vetting question- what is the darkest most deviant thing you would want to do real time? Go along with it. Even say that’s good. Cool. Why? Because their darkest kinky thing that puts you in danger, you will know that they just aren’t the right person for you. They aren’t keeping your best interest at heart. If it puts your health or well being in danger then don’t say much, just leave soon and don’t go back. Remember a good and loving dominant doesn’t ever want his toys broken. Ever. He respects and cares for them. Additionally, know what you want. I mean truly know. If you want a 24/7 lifestyle, and he wants a scene once in a while, this isn’t going to work. If you are both on the same page- great. If not, no harm walk away

Additionally, know what you want. I mean truly know. If you want a 24/7 lifestyle, and he wants a scene once in a while, this isn’t going to work. If you are both on the same page- great. If not, no harm- walk away

Also, use your gut instinct. Listen to what he says to you, but watch his actions. If he appears to only be interested in a quick fuck, (of course not on the day you meet.) decide if that’s what you truly want. If he just wants play time, that’s fine but know what you can handle and what you can’t. I don’t like only play time. It would never work for me. For me, there has to be a tight bond, emotional bond, the possibility to be loved, at least that at a minimum.

The real issue here is to always allow yourself processing time, meeting in a safe public place, and know what you want. Keep your gut instincts and spidey senses keenly aware. Feel and see any red flags. And above all else, use your innate common sense. If it feels creepy, it IS creepy. Don’t set off alarms there. Wait till you’re safe at home, then politely tell him it won’t work out. Ghosting is not really my style,  but if you’re that afraid so be it. Safety is your main concern- physical and emotional safety.

I was lucky and knew instantly that Daddy was right. We even bantered and mildly argued, but something about him I instinctively knew this was a good man. He had a good heart and soul. I could trust him. I was right. And still, do.

I love you, Daddy, more today than yesterday and less than tomorrow.

With Much Love,

Sugar