3 months ago. Tue 19 Mar 2019 07:10:08 AM IST
*trigger warning: cheating*
(I'm not sure if I'm going to actually post this, or keep it a draft. I just needed a safe place to express myself. So if I do post this, I apologize for the grammar errors, the off-topic moments, or if I'm making absolutely no sense.)
Today, I learned that a close friend of mine recently cheated on his partner over the weekend (I say 'partner' because the terms of their relationship weren't necessarily defined. All I knew was she was his and he was hers.). His excuse was he was drunk and he didn't realize what he was doing. He also said that he didn't think it would be such a big deal because they aren't "technically" in a relationship. *sigh*. In my opinion, this is why the terms of relationship need to be spoken and agreed upon to avoid any confusion.To add insult to injury, he lied to her. They then decided to "take a break" to think on what each of them wanted from one another.
I DO NOT LIKE LIARS and I DO NOT LIKE CHEATERS.
I personally have been cheated on in the past, multiple times. So to hear a close friend of mine cheated on their partner, and then lie, hit really close to home for me...
I was Facebook and a friend of mine shared a post. This post contained a story. In the story, this guy talked about how he cheated on his baby's mother repeatedly AND she knew. He didn't even hide it anymore. After the birth of their child, literally right after, he was about to leave to go cheat, and she asked him to stay and take what he needed from her... IN THE HOSPITAL. She wasn't even physically ready to have sex. He...fucked her. Roughly. And he was completely aware of it. When it was over, the nurse came in and she said, "I love him too much." He then left, and went to go cheat. WHO DOES THAT???
Reading the story gave me so much anxiety. It broke my heart. It ruined me. Now, this story may not even be true, but there are people actually out there that have no regard for the heart of someone else. They don't care that their actions cause other people hurt. How can someone wake up in the morning, and deliberately hurt another soul? They just do not c a r e .
Again, I know what it feels like to get cheated on. I know what it feels like wondering if you're good enough to be with that person. I know what it feels like to cry yourself to sleep, and wake up and cry some more. I know what it feels like to be hurt...
Hearing about my friend doing these things, and then reading that story... I guess it just reopened some old wounds. I hate how much of an emotionally person I am. I hate how I feel things so deeply. I hate how I react to things and situations that have literally nothing to do with me. I hate it. *long, dramatic, over-the-top sigh*
Alright, I'm done...