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Land of confusion.

I just..........smh
1 week ago. Sat 11 May 2019 05:52:44 PM IDT

I am taking a leave of absence for a while, I think the consistent diet of catfish and bullshit has gotten to me. Sadly this makes me a hypocrite because I just got back in touch with a girl who is a kajira and seems to be beyond my usual, but being where I am in my head I am screwing her over with neglect that she does not deserve. I am sorry girl. Safe Travels everyone.

1 week ago. Wed 08 May 2019 10:47:24 PM IDT

.....just paging through profiles I am starting to think this site should be renamed The Crib.

1 week ago. Tue 07 May 2019 12:08:32 AM IDT

I have prided myself on being as honest as I can be. I am very specific on my expectations, brutally honest about what life in  my collar would be like, and I understand there is a miniscule of girls who would submit to me in this capacity.

     Over the years I have grown jaded and suspicious of anyone who would tell me they wanted to be mine. 99% of the time the person I am talking to is lying to me. God knows what they get from it, but I no longer become honestly emotionally vested in people as a general rule. A few special people have earned some affection, usually people who like me more as a person than a Dom, which is fine, but that is an elite circle. I just had another one, one who made promises, overtures, then wandered away to someone else without mentioning it. Of course being who I am I had to troll them both, I had a laugh enraging them. Eventually she came crawling back, telling me a line about me being right about the type of bullshit Dom he was. (He put in his profile that he had submitted to her and she was breaking him....so....) More overtures and promises, so I let it play out for shits and giggles, told her what she wanted me to say until her eventual return to him. I assume as a move to hurt me.  I am certain they are having a nice chuckle thinking they have caused me some harm, but, whatever.

So this has me thinking, why do I bother being honest? Why not just do what everyone else does, lie to get someone into a position I want them in, then force them to be what I need. I get lied to multiple times a day, why not just be what someone needs until I can make them what I need?

Oh yeah, because I am a Dom and I don't need to play games, just patience.

 

I am certain the girl and boy I spoke of may have words to say on this thread in an effort to defend themselves or to troll me more, I have nothing more to say to them so their comments will be ignored so it will become obvious quickly who they are.

 

1 month ago. Fri 05 Apr 2019 05:40:00 PM IDT

 ......or, let's talk about submission. In my experience this has been a polarizing subject, there are two vastly different ideas of what submission means, what it is, and how it is practiced. I would first like to present the definition which is,

"the action or fact of accepting or yielding to a superior force or to the will or authority of another person."

Seems simple enough when reading it. The point of contention though is when you are the person looking to have someone accept or yield to your will or authority. How is this accomplished? I myself have always thought of submission as how it is naturally acquired as demonstrated through natural means. You present yourself in a position of authority and you expect submission from those who are subordinate. Look at nature, this is how it manifests in every species who has this form of heirarchy. We as humans also have this, Parents with children, employers with employees, and law enforcement with citizens. There is an authoritative presence, and an expectation of some form of acceptance, or yielding of control.

More recently, and only in the D/s, M/s community, the idea of submission as a gift. At it's essence it is someone who wants to be in a position of authority over another person, but first must offer something in trade for acceptance or yeilding of control. Usually it's some form of limit on control, not to be confused with a sub, or slaves personal limits, but more I'm line with granting certain freedoms that are not normally consistent with the idea of TPE. From experience and observation I have noticed with the submission as a gift dynamic, submission becomes a conditional situation, and the list of limiters can grow or fluctuate as the sun/slave sees fit and can result in the revocation of submission, so that submission becomes more of an object to be traded than an action.

These are of course my opinions, and although I will admit to a bias, my bias was formed experiencing both forms of submission. In the way of submission as an expectation, I felt I was in control. While I had no problems allowing some freedoms, it was a request to be asked, and a  conversation to be had. With submission as a gift I felt more like I had little control there was no conversation, only expectation, and if the expectation was not met then the submission was taken away and the person moved on. I can admit that while I may not agree with submission as a gift because of the many experiences I have had with it, I can not deny it as a valid form of D/s, M/s because it does work for some people. At the same time, submission as an expectation is just as valid because it also works for some people.

I need to be in control, I have issues functioning in a M/s dynamic where I am not in control. Do not invalidate my needs because it does not fit your opinion.

 

Safe Travels.

 

 

 

 

2 months ago. Thu 14 Mar 2019 05:24:51 PM IST

I yam what I yam. 

 

Bondage, D/s, M/s, these aren't things I saw in a movie, read in a book, or was Introduced to by a former partner, on some level it is and has always been apart of who I am, part of my nature. For myself I hate the word kinky because it does not encapsulate what things are for me. I have always been this way, even when it was buried beneath my own societal expectations, my nature was always in conflict with that expectation and has left some scars because of it.

Am I perfect? God no,

Do I know everything? Never.

Do I know what I want? Yes and no.

Firstly want is the wrong word, for me it is definitely a need, I have tried to walk away from it many times due to frustrations, but I always have that pull to come back to it.

Secondly, I know what I need now, but like any person indulging in one thing can lead to new experiences, new thoughts, and new ways to feel whole.

 

I think that is what I am trying to explain about myself. I don't feel whole, complete. It's not a romantic thing, it's......complicated to explain because it seems my thoughts on submission and enslavement are very different than most, what I see as perfect sense, others don't.

 

I need a girl who understands the selfless nature a slave should have, that perfect trust. Everyone is so worried about getting what they want, that they cannot exist as I need them to. I need her to exist to please me, to serve me, I do not need her motivation to be what I can give her, this is not how power exchange works no matter who started that lie.

Not everyone will agree with me, precious few actually, and that is fine. It has been the experiences I have had that have shown me what doesn't work. I've been lied to, stolen from, cheated on, manipulated, and have had my heart broken.  This is what has made me what I am, and this is why I will spend the rest of my life looking if I must. Eventually someone will get it.

 

 

 

 

2 months ago. Fri 01 Mar 2019 06:13:07 PM IST

It is my belief we are all born with a predisposed nature, our sort of authentic self. Then many of us are forced away from this nature by the expectations of family, of society, and our peers. We coat ourselves in this she'll in an effort to fit in and be normal. For many of us, what eventually happens is that our nature comes in conflict with these expectations. We know we are supposed to be something, but we are constantly peppered with the idea that what we are supposed to be is in some way wrong. Leading when we need to follow, follow when we need to lead. Falling into all the rituals of society, working, marriage, children, all while denying who we are because we are supposed to until we reach that moment when we can no longer stand who we have become. Lives become upended, relationships destoyed, being called selfish for finally for the first time doing what feels right for yourself. None of you are alone in this, and none of you are really an evil person, no matter how much you others may try to make you feel that way.

 

Some are able to live a duality, to be the expectation indulging the nature, others of us burn down the expectation to try and embrace who they are. Others still need to have those layers forcably pulled away so that they can breathe for the first time unencumbered.

 

We are not deviants, we are not evil, sick, or any of the other labels you have had to endure as a result of being your authentic self. We are Dominants, Submissives, Masters, Slaves, and every variation of those things.

I am who I am, some disagree with what I need, with what I am in essence, and what I believe, and that is great, I would be more than happy to answer questions or respectfully debate anything you like. I will not however engage in your shitty behavior, even if it is your nature.

 

2 months ago. Fri 01 Mar 2019 06:08:06 PM IST

It is my belief we are all born with a predisposed nature, our sort of authentic self. Then many of us are forced away from this nature by the expectations of family, of society, and our peers. We coat ourselves in this she'll in an effort to fit in and be normal. For many of us, what eventually happens is that our nature comes in conflict with these expectations. We know we are supposed to be something, but we are constantly peppered with the idea that what we are supposed to be is in some way wrong. Leading when we need to follow, follow when we need to lead. Falling into all the rituals of society, working, marriage, children, all while denying who we are because we are supposed to until we reach that moment when we can no longer stand who we have become. Lives become upended, relationships destoyed, being called selfish for finally for the first time doing what feels right for yourself. None of you are alone in this, and none of you are really an evil person, no matter how much you others may try to make you feel that way.

 

Some are able to live a duality, to be the expectation indulging the nature, others of us burn down the expectation to try and embrace who they are. Others still need to have those layers forcably pulled away so that they can breathe for the first time unencumbered.

 

We are not deviants, we are not evil, sick, or any of the other labels you have had to endure as a result of being your authentic self. We are Dominants, Submissives, Masters, Slaves, and every variation of those things.

I am who I am, some disagree with what I need, with what I am in essence, and what I believe, and that is great, I would be more than happy to answer questions or respectfully debate anything you like. I will not however engage in your shitty behavior, even if it is your nature.

 

2 months ago. Thu 28 Feb 2019 09:07:03 PM IST

There are just things that never cease to amaze me. I am an old school sort who prefers enslavment over a D/s dynamic. By old school, I mean, as a Dom or Master, I am in charge. I have tried consenting slavery, and the thing that irritated me the most is that the slave holds all the power and she knows it. Argue all you need to, the truth of it is that offering submission as a prize, as a gift gives more value to submission than dominance, this also means that what is given, can be also taken away. It's nothing but role play. When a slave dictates terms, limits, and defines the dynamic, she is not the submissive one, the so called Dom who allows this is. Slavery is not about gifts, Princesses, littles or any other of the bullshit that the Fifty Shades crowd is trying to force on us. My friends, Slavery is simply about control. Who is in control? If you have to walk on eggshells around your slave, if you have to worry about upsetting your slave, if you have to consult your slave, Dude it's not you.

Now this is not a gripe about submissives, you are a different sort, a submissive is in control of their own life, who, what, when, where, why, and how long. These are not things a slave controls, this is what defines a slave and differentiates them from submissives. I am not looking for a submissive, so do not tell me you are a slave then make demands because you are not too pretty, too special, too anything for me to drop and move on. I am in control, period. I am certain not everyone agrees with me because somehow opinions in this world have become equivalent to facts, but I am not going to debate this with anyone.  If you have issues, just move along and forget I exist.

Safe Travels.