This post going to go over a few things, most of which may be negative. I need to vent, I need to write, I just... need. So I get to assault you poor people with my nonsense for a few minutes on a cold and wet Friday night. You’re welcome?
First Topic!
Fuck snow and ice.
Next Topic!!
This topic is one that I have been wrestling with for a while. And it’s been on my mind a lot recently for a few different reasons. So maybe if I get it out, put the words on paper it’ll make sense to me.
Anyone who has followed my blogs should be aware that I am new to this lifestyle. I openly admit it, both here and on my profile. I’m upfront with people about that and I don’t try to come off as more than I am. I am very new. And I am learning. And that’s wonderful.
People are supportive of that fact. At least at first. Once things begin, once all the questions are asked, once all the guidelines are in place, people seem to forget that I’m new to this. I ask for patience, understanding, and communication. But it doesn’t really seem to matter. Any dynamic that I have tried has fallen apart in a matter of days, leaving me somewhat confused.
I know that sometimes it’s just not going to work because that’s how life works. But I don’t get it. You can be super excited to do this, but once we begin, it falls apart. I don’t get feedback on what I’m doing right, what I need to work on. No one provides anything so I can’t even begin to know where to start. It’s frustrating. How can I get better if no one will tell me what doesn’t work?
The only thing I can think of is my “style” that’s causing issues. Anyone who gets to know me can attest to the fact that I’m a sweet and caring person. I love the gentle things in life, and I want to be able to have that in the world around me.
But the world seems to view a good Dom as a strict hardass who doesn’t smile and is always barking orders or grabbing a paddle. Granted, I know that a lot of that image is very skewed by popular media and isn’t very accurate. But there is some truth to that. There is generally a bit of strictness to this role.
But with me being as nice and kind and caring as I am, I don’t know that I can actually do this. When you meet a person and all they see is that friendly gentle spirit, they seem to have trouble seeing you in an authoritative way. It makes things a challenge.
Where do you draw that line? How do you draw that line? Can I even draw that line? Because I’m not sure that I can or have, but of course no one will tell me. I’m left stuck in my confusion, wondering about the things I’m getting wrong, questioning if I’ve done anything right.
So here I am. Confused, and just trying to figure all of it out. If any of you have any insight here, let me know. If you are a Dom/me who is more on the sensitive side, how do you do it? If you’re a sub and you’ve had a gentle Dom/me, how did that go?
I welcome any and all feedback on that. If you’d prefer, send me a message instead of a comment here and we can do it that way.
New Topic!!!
Through all of this, I’m coming to realize I’m more of a Daddy than a regular Dom. And I like that role. I truly love the feeling of being a Daddy. It’s one of the best things I’ve felt in a long time. And no, despite some people’s opinions, it’s not weird pseudo-pedophilia thing. My babygirl is an adult. That’s something we have been very clear on.
If you dislike that type of dynamic and think less of me, oh well. But keep any and all rude comments ya to yourself. I’ve seen way too many shitty people with fucked up opinions on this. Don’t like it? That’s cool. No need to comment. Just move along.
New Topic!!!!
On to lighter topics? I need a new show to watch. I hope to find something funny with multiple seasons. The Office, Parks and Rec, Community, Big Bang Theory, Friends... This is the type of thing I’m looking for. If you have any suggestions, let me know!
I can’t really seem to focus on more serious stuff currently. Maybe the focus needed to watch something with depth is lacking due to all the weirdness in life. All the stuff I mentioned above, all the stress and depression that 2020 brought, the depression that comes with the isolation. Hell, maybe even just adult ADHD that decided to show up at the ripe old age of 37.
Hit me with things that will make me laugh and forget the bad things! Speaking of funny stuff, Community has been my go to show recently. I’m on my like 4th trip through it since... Thanksgiving? Something like that. But the theme for it has been hitting in a emotionally rewarding (or depressing) way. So I’m sharing that to close the blog. Enjoy!!
