Give & take.

63M single, multi-lingual, straight switch, New York City, New York, seeking a SWF switch, 40-63, for a lifetime partnership/LTR, anywhere in the USA!



Looking for a monogamous LTR and even marriage.
I'm looking for a soulmate/permanent relationship. I'm reasonably attractive, not overweight, intelligent, easy-going, personable, friendly, and have a sense of humor. I have many interests and abilities. If this also describes you, then I have an interest in you.

I want to have a vanilla relationship, but with a fetish twist. I'm seeking a mate who wants to explore the limits of their sexuality. Please message me about your interests and desires. I am both dominant and submissive. I would like to do both within a sexual relationship with my woman. I am not cruel and am interested in using BDSM to create and build a stronger marital bond with my woman. See the article by Jean.



Why I Married A Masochist Just Like Myself

I recently came across this remark in a comment to a post at a group, "I play with a couple and they tell me it makes their bond much stronger."

YES, that is 100% true in our case as well. People sometimes ask me why, if I'm a masochist, didn't I marry a sadistically oriented man instead of a masochistically oriented one just like myself. And, my answer is because, no matter how tender the after-care, and no matter how much he said he loved me, the fact that I would know that he gets genuine pleasure out of torturing and tormenting me would always leave a seed of doubt in my mind, and I'd always wonder if he really loved me or if he was just selfishly exploiting my masochism for his own personal benefit and gain. I don't have those doubts with my husband.

I mean, in the heat of sexual passion people will whisper things like, "Oh, God, Baby, I love you so much I'd die for you". But, it's just pillow talk. Remarks like that are just sweet nothings. A lot of husbands who say that to their wives in bed will run the other way, and leave their wives high and dry to fend for themselves, if real danger came their way. My husband, jon, isn't like that. I know that he'd deliberately put himself in harms way to protect me. I know that because I've watched him do it many times.

When the two of us are in an S&M situation, jon has actually sacrificed himself in order to spare me from further pain and suffering. We've been in situations where he's pleaded with the people torturing us not to stop his pain but to stop MINE. The two of us have been put in "predicament bondage" situations where he's had to keep his body is some VERY strenuous position because if he relaxed our bondage connection would inflict pain on me in some way. I've watched him strain and struggle to the point of screaming trying with everything he had to maintain his own anguish and misery rather then relax and be the cause of my pain. I've watched him do that to the point where it broke my heart, made me cry, and compelled me to literally beg him to get some relief and let me share the torture with him. He never does that until he reaches the point where he just can't physically keep it up anymore and just can't go on any longer. And, when he does relax, and it does start causing me pain, it breaks his heart to see what it's doing to me. He'll actually cry too and actually beg me to forgive him for not being stronger. He won't even let me endure it for very long. He'll start straining after as little rest as possible to try and regain the position he has to hold to prevent hurting me.

I ask you, how could you not love a man like that. And, because he does that for me, I tend to be just as selfless and self sacrificing on his behalf too. Yes, I watch people treat him like a dog. Yes, I watch people abuse him as if he were just a spineless wimp. But, I know he isn't. He has a status in my eyes that no Dom could ever have, and I know his love for me is genuinely true in a way that no Dom could ever really convince me. We share a bond that's probably stronger and more enduring then the vast majority of married couples. And, it's mainly because the two of us are masochists and because the two of us share situations where we have the chance to prove our mutual love in the most meaningful ways possible. So, I can certainly agree with that comment above.

After reading way I said above, I guess you can probably understand why my husband and I say that when we're tortured together by other people we're actually making love to each other. :-)

jean

I would love you and would never ask you to do something that I wouldn't do myself. A totally equal relationship in all ways.
Your most likely a older woman but maybe its time to dust yourself off and get into a committed relationship to see your years out. I am a very good communicator so feel free to contact me and let's see if we have some common interests.
I have never married but I really am looking to do this before I get too old. I am feeling very young now and am active.

I don't care where you live. The important thing is to find the right person. I'm willing and able to relocate anywhere in the USA. I currently live in New York City, and being there is okay, but i am not limited to living there.

Private message me if interested, or post a response below. I will respond to all inquiries. Thank you.

notavanilla