U cant change a person.... I was with a woman for two years that always swore she try.... I even married her on that belief. She showed every sign of being right on the edge of being everything i craved. But every time she would "try" it would be a disaster. It almost destroyed me as a person and sent me through several bouts of self-doubt and depresion. Find someone who love u and fits u just the way they are.
There are no standardized rules to kink, BDSM, D/s, DD/lg. Whatever alphabet you use, there are no rules that everyone has to follow, except the other golden rule of Consent. Everything else is just guidelines and good ideas. You don't have to follow anything you don't want to. Lastly the only real thing is communication and negotiation.
That there are a lot of wanna be's out there. Don't do anything that makes you uncomfortable until you have met and trust your partner. Its ok to say no. You are not a doormat just because your submissive. Take you time and ask questions,, a lot of questions.