I’ve been this way for as long as I can remember. And like you felt the same way. Someone must be wrong with me. Mainstream always says the woman has the “headaches” and the man is deprived. It is good to know we are some sort of freaks of nature...we are, but in the best way!
I like what Pan said about it being almost like an addiction.
Yet for me it isn’t just him. It’s always been there waiting for me. So addictive personality? Idk *shrugs*
Yeah, for me it isn't about one person (usually). I, historically, go into public and will start fantasizing about a guy pretty much every place I am. They don't even have to be conventionally attractive, there is just something about those ones that makes me wonder if they are "good".
I know my sex drive isn't tied to any sort of past abuse, as I haven't had any. And while I haven't always wanted it as often as I currently do, I've always wanted it more than any guy I've been with. (Even though they THINK they want it a lot.) That makes me sound terrible... But I'm pretty sure I'm not doing anything THAT wrong!
I was just talking to someone about this. I have a label. "Insatiable." Every partner I come across tells me I am insatiable. Stating it like it is a good and sexy thing at first--then later it becomes tiring and taxing as they realize what that really means for them. I am this hyper sexual woman that is willing and capable of having sex for long periods of time and can achieve numerous orgasms. It can be "too much" for some to handle.
I cannot truly satisfy myself through masturbation. I have had countless debates with people over this. I am not "broken" and I do not need sex therapy. I am a sexual submissive that is into BDSM and needs more mental and physical stimulation than I can provide for myself---The kind a Dom provides for me. If I am addicted to that sort of co-dependency, yes, that does suck for me... but you know what doesn't suck? The quality of my orgasms that I get with a Dom. I have swapped details with vanilla friends. Doesn't compare.
So, being that my drive is to serve and please one Dom only, I will need to find one that can truly support my sexual appetite. I won't settle for less. My goal is to find someone who has the mindset of often wanting to break his own record for how many orgasms he can get me to achieve in one evening! Here's hoping!
bunnie has raised an interesting point. one I happen to agree with. It however goes far beyond ones sex drive. Is it even possible to satisfy a subs needs? Do they not always want more regardless of what they have? Perhaps a new forum is needed to answer this.
Have you considered making your "solo" play, a part of your kink with your partner?
((( I'm going to give you a "first person example" because it's easier for me to write this way. It's only intended as something you can discuss with him, it's not intended to actually be making commands or assumptions. )))
Have him give you a command to be executed *daily* ... something on the order of this:
"You will use your toys to give yourself sexual gratification, at (specific time) every single day.
You will prepare for this by spending 10 minutes in meditation, during which you will create for yourself the beginning/setting of a fantasy scenario that gets you hot. After the 10 minutes are up (and ONLY after 10 minutes, no jumping the gun!) you will bind your ankles, crossed, and put on your blindfold and red ballgag.
You will then spend at least 5 minutes teasing your nipples while fantasizing about 'what happens next' in your scenario... build-up plot, only... nothing sexual or too erotic. During this time, you must NOT touch your sex.
After you have spent 15 minutes fantasizing and teasing yourself, you will then use the Hitachi wand on yourself while you play out the rest of the fantasy in your mind. You mustn't cum, until you have been on the edge at least 3 times, to a point you would normally ask me for permission if I were with you.
After the third time coming back from the edge, carry the fantasy to its climax, and, if you have followed these instructions to the letter... you may have your own climax.
After you have cum, and released yourself, you are to perform any necessary clean-up, compose yourself, and write me a journal, describing your fantasy to me in detail that gets you hot all over again."
The upshot of this, is that it makes him a *part* of your solo play. It can be exciting for HIM to know what you want, and learn about your fantasies in a way that is safe for him, and possibly even give him ideas for what he wants to do with you at some point in the future.
Another twist, to this, is that he could require you to write a journal about your LAST fantasy.... right before you do today's... so you go into it from the beginning with a highly eroticized mindset.