New and blown away by bdsm

Bunnie • Nov 2, 2018

The reality is that there are people who explore this, and are also married to a different person (most often, that individual is unaware). There are many different opinions on this. I’m not going to share mine. What I am going to say is that perhaps you need to keep in mind your situation when looking for a potential partner. Be honest, be fair and be realistic about what you can offer and what you’re looking for in return. People get hurt.

the elf • Nov 2, 2018

They want the thrill, they are not interested in enhancing their marriage or being honest.
That takes actual work. The horror.
Case closed.

DallasSub4You​(sub female) • Nov 3, 2018

From another fellow sub, I would have to agree with the advice above. Trust is the foundation of ANY relationship and is even more paramount in our community. You are new to this side of yourself. Take some time and learn to trust yourself first. You said you were lost. Find out who YOU are as it relates to this community and your instincts will guide the rest. Be you.... whoever that is.

EnforcedBliss​(dom male) • Nov 3, 2018

His partner isn’t aware of his being a master online.


This to me screams red-flag. Others who know more may come to correct me but that displays a willingness to be deceptive and dishonest ( a lie of omission is sin a lie) to someone he claims to want a relationship with.

If she is unaware and especially if he knows or suspects that she'd disapprove then he owes it to her to break it off with one or the other or be straight with her. I would be asking myself, "if he'll deceive her how do I trust he won't deceive me?"

But I am only an egg and have not grokked in fullness so I may be way off.