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A curious question for the Dominants...

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Dark Fox​(dom female){Wolfy13}
6 months ago • Sun 16 Dec 2018 05:42:22 PM IST
Dark Fox​(dom female){Wolfy13} • Sun 16 Dec 2018 05:42:22 PM IST
You can have respect without love. You cannot have love without respect. You can /think/ you have love but you wont have /true/, undeniable love without respecting the person you are claiming to love.

That's how you can compare and measure.
FabSeverus​(dom male)
6 months ago • Sun 16 Dec 2018 11:09:05 PM IST
FabSeverus​(dom male) • Sun 16 Dec 2018 11:09:05 PM IST
Some dynamic or relationship between a Dom and a sub doesnt involved love, and even with some conscentor agreement, respect.
You dont need love to respect someone
Cruel2bkind​(dom male)
5 months ago • Sat 22 Dec 2018 04:58:18 AM IST
Cruel2bkind​(dom male) • Sat 22 Dec 2018 04:58:18 AM IST
In order for true love to flurish it has to be selfish. What I mean is that you should only love someone for what they do for you. Then in turn you make them feel loved
Hence the circle continues. Respect can be one sided.
MasterRenton​(dom male)
5 months ago • Tue 01 Jan 2019 12:34:38 PM IST
MasterRenton​(dom male) • Tue 01 Jan 2019 12:34:38 PM IST
Depends on the dynamic - personally if the dynamic extends past playtime I would expect both the lack of either would be a red flag and I would step away quickly. Life is too short for getting only part of your expectations met ?
CapnRick​(dom male)
5 months ago • Tue 01 Jan 2019 02:27:04 PM IST
CapnRick​(dom male) • Tue 01 Jan 2019 02:27:04 PM IST
Interesting posts here, and a kudos to Bunny for posing an intriguing question.

I'd like to buck the trend a bit, and offer this perspective... As a Dom I desire a sub's freely offered submissiveness, without coercion or fear.

Whether she arrives at that emotional place through respect, or through loving, is essentially beside the point, at least to me. I've cherished subs who were married and loved their husbands except for the missing needs of a sub. Those relationships did not require any transference of her love, or adding a new love. In fact, for a married sub to develop deep feelings of love for her Dom has caused more than one relationship to smash on that emotional rock.
There are also successful D/s relationships which last where respect is narrowly defined for one or the other of the partners-- a person can be an excellent Dom or submissive, but not be worthy of complete respect--let alone love-- as a human being.
So I offer that neither unlimited respect, or declared love is an essential to participate in the complex emotions of a D/s relationship. Of course some level of respect needs to be earned for trust to develop. But love? Some (many?) are here who are already committed in a love relationship of some sort or other. So, perhaps that need not be risked to enjoy either side of a fulfilling D/s relationship.
CapnRick​(dom male)
5 months ago • Tue 01 Jan 2019 04:49:00 PM IST
CapnRick​(dom male) • Tue 01 Jan 2019 04:49:00 PM IST
TKS for the thumbs up, Bunnie--I'd like to compliment you on your newish profile picture--no wonder you can't accept new messages!
WADom4U​(dom male)
5 months ago • Tue 01 Jan 2019 07:16:04 PM IST

Which is more important for you to receive? Love or Respect

WADom4U​(dom male) • Tue 01 Jan 2019 07:16:04 PM IST
Love! ! !

I can and do respect many people, men and women, yet I don't love them or I am not "in" love with them.

But if I love someone, truly love them, then I also respect them. How could you love someone, or be in love with someone and not respect them? To me respecting someone is part and parcel of love. I would find it odd and quite alarming to hear someone declare that they love their Master / Dominant but don't respect him.

Just my 2c worth.

Brian

p.s. I love your new profile picture. Very lovely.
PrevalingMaster​(dom male)
5 months ago • Wed 02 Jan 2019 11:04:21 PM IST
PrevalingMaster​(dom male) • Wed 02 Jan 2019 11:04:21 PM IST
Well to me this is useful, I think, to compare and contrast our relationship with our patents as with with Dom/Sub relationships. In both of these, to me FULL respect of BOTH parties is absolutely essential for the relationship to work. As i view this love without respect is dangerous; it can crush the other person, sometimes emotionally for life. To respect is to understand that the other person is not you ( be it sub/dom/daddy/little), not an extension of you, not a reflection of you, not a toy, not a pet, not my product to use as i will. In a relationship of respect, as i view myself MY task is to understand the submissive as a unique individual and learn how to mesh my needs with hers and help that person achieve whats I want her to achieve. My task as a Dom/Daddy is not to control the sub or try to change her in a direction that I desire but she does out of inner desire and respect to FULFILL my needs as her Dom and as a Man. In given time love brings bliss to both types of relationships, but only if tempered by respect. Love adds joy and provides the emotional bonds that help carry the DS relationship through hard times. The attachment aspect of the Sub's love is even more valuable in my relationship with her than in that with others.

My last Sub grew up in a family that had lots of "love" but little respect. Our relationship was practically destroyed because of lack of respect. A combo of the two would be the very best but respect must come first or there can be no authentic love.
Look to me love is not all you need, nor all your Sub or Daddy needs, and certainly not all your Little's need. We all need respect, especially from those who are closest and most intimately connected with us.