First fantasies of BDSM

First fantasies of BDSM

Lotus​(sub female) • Feb 17, 2019

Lately I have been thinking about my life, past experiences and relationships and how I ended up joining this site.

I would consider myself to be new-ish to this lifestyle and am both proud of what I have experienced and humbled by the experiences I have learned about through others.

But....how did I get here?!!?!

Am I innately a submissive woman?

Is it a combination of past experiences and learned behavior?!!!

The first time I had a submissive fantasy (daydream), I was 5 years old, in the back of my parents conversion van driving to the Grand Caynon. It took a few days of hours long drives and stopping at KOA’s until we made it. One of the main things that got me through the trip there was a particular fantasy I played over in my head....I was a magician’s assistant; he would tie me up, put me in ‘unsafe’ situations and predicaments on stage. It completely aroused me! I had never been exposed to a magic show hahaha or anything of the sort really, it seems to be something I completely conjured up on my own!

I just wanted to share this as I have being thinking about the origins of BDSM in my own life and think it will be fun to hear some others as well!!!

SoaringFree​(sub female) • Feb 17, 2019

For me it didn't really start until I was in my mid 30s. I was bored sexually and found that my husband at the time really just wasn't strong enough to turn me on. I'm a dominate personality, but nothing turns me on more than a man intellectually and physically stronger than myself. His Dominate personality needs to be stronger than mine and show it; make her bow. That's when I found that even though in my life I usually took Alpha roles, I really wanted to kneel down and please my man in our home. Let go of the decision making, release the stress of the day. To have him pet my head laying in his lap, spank my bottom, blindfold me and lead the way.... Those are the things I now dream about.

AKittenforSir​(sub female){JohnBond} • Feb 17, 2019

I don’t remember my very first fantasy but I remember when and where they stemmed from. I’m a bibliophile. I have been for as long as I can remember. In my pre-teen years I spent a lot of time reading angsty romance novels (but not any BDSM type novels, that started in my early twenties). In those angsty novels there’d often be a “villain” of some sort separating the leading lady from the heroic lead male. In almost every book, I’d find myself drawn to the villain rather than the hero. I wasn’t turned on by the hero’s grand romantic gestures, but instead found myself squeezing my thighs together when the villain bound and gagged the leading lady and threw her in his basement (speaking hypothetically and not about any particular book). At the time I thought I was just weird, but when I discovered BDSM novels I realized “Oh wow, so there’s a whole world of people who think like me.”

MasterBear​(other butch) • Feb 18, 2019

Spankings...

I remember fantasizing and getting aroused by it.

ropefish • Feb 18, 2019

When I was in kindergarten, this friend from church and I would roleplay about a princess getting kidnapped by an evil villain and then saved by a prince. We'd always fight over who got to be the princess. The other one of us would play the villain, and would whip and torture the princess in horrible ways. Then the prince would come to save her.... and we'd immediately restart the game when that happened so we could get back to the torture. xD

What can I say, I was born a submissive.

Looking for a first-time experience something I want to try

buster57 • Feb 18, 2019

something's been nagging at me I've been looking to have the first time pegging experience something I've never done before I'm an older man of 51 would like to find a woman who is interested and giving me my first experience more than willing to return the favor

GentlemanX{CuriousKit} • Feb 18, 2019

This is a fantastic thread! My BDSM fantasies behan as early as i cam remember, and would ultimately lead to a life changing relationship whem i found someone who would listen to my kinky perversions. What you are saying really resonates with me on a personal level. When I was young, I couldn't seem to relate with the girls my age. I suppose I was strange, a weirdo, different from all my peers. It wouldn't be until High School that I had my first girlfriend, but it wasn't a typical high school relationship. I was 13 and she was 22. I can go on about how it happened, the events that led up to it, and the impact that it had on all of my future relationships. I was introduced to BDSM and bondage very early. I tied a single column before I had my first kiss, and that wasn't even a normal kiss.

Perhaps, when I get a little bit more comfortable here on the cage, I'll get into a little more detail about 4 years of my life that set the stage for the next couple of decades appreciate your post as well as the comments I've read here. It's comforting to know that I wasn't the only one confused at an early age. I like to think that I leveled out overtime, but I guess I wouldn't be here if that was true. Hope you all have a kink tastic day!

Lotus​(sub female) • Feb 18, 2019

I’m happy you like the thread! Sounds like we were wired different from the start. My “daydream” was not sexual in nature, as I was only a young child and had not been exposed and was not aware of anything of that nature. It was a“damsel in distress” scenerio.

Sounds silly, but I also remember watching “I dream of Jeannie” on “Nick at Night” as a child. I was enchanted by the relationship between her and her “Master”. (Although I have no desire to enter into a M/s relationship).

Fingers​(dom female) • Feb 18, 2019

For me it was during early masterbation as a young teen

I would do things that were painful. e.g. pull my labia long and hard, hold my breath, put things inside me that seemed improbable.

Looking back it seems fairly obvious that i took pleasure from pain. The journey has been long but I'm getting there.

I wish i'd had the courage years ago.

AKittenforSir​(sub female){JohnBond} • Feb 18, 2019

Oh my gosh, yes! I Dream of Jeannie. I LOVED that show and found their dynamic to be incredibly attractive.