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Who pays for what?

Misterasmodai​(dom male)
4 years ago • Aug 5, 2019
Misterasmodai​(dom male) • Aug 5, 2019
As far as my dynamics go, my subs are allowed to buy anything they wish, as long as it does not violate any standing order (dietary, clothing, overall financial restrictions, etc.)
When my subs are with me, or they are tasked with getting something for me, I pay for everything.
I have had a couple issues in the past with subs attempting to use me for my money, so I have a system where my subs are not allowed to own anything that I pay for that is not formally gifted to them. That takes care of material items.
As far as travel and other non-material expenses, I still pay, but I utilize a vetting process to ensure that a sub is fully committed before travel arrangements are made.
As far as food goes, I enjoy food enough to basically just share with everyone, so food is much more lax of an expense.
Pumpkin29​(sub female){MrWhite}
4 years ago • Aug 2, 2019
My Sir has an old school mentality where the man, or Dom by extension in our case, pays for everything.
It drives me bonkers, and I continually ask to pay for things. Occasionally he lets me win because he knows how much it bothers me to have him "keep" me... but that's just my own hangup that he soothes to make me more comfortable.
JohnBond​(dom male){Kitten}
4 years ago • Aug 2, 2019
As my kitten says here I personally prefer to pay for things and see that as part of my duty, especially if it’s something I’d like to see her wear or use for me. Finances can be pretty complicated though so it’s one of those areas that should be talked about so expectations can be managed.
AKittenforSir​(sub female){JohnBond}
4 years ago • Aug 2, 2019
When unowned, a sub could/should feel free to purchase any toy, outfit, etc that she wishes to have in her repertoire.

In a relationship in which the sub is owned, it’s a more complicated manner. I think it is specific to each Dom’s preferences. My Sir would be okay with me purchasing something if I told him it was important to me in some way that I be the one to buy it. But unless I explicitly laid that out for him, he’d just buy it himself. He pays for the majority of all things in our relationship. He considers it to be part of taking care of me, which he views as his number one priority as a Dom.
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PrincessSunshine​(sub female)
4 years ago • Aug 2, 2019

Who pays for what?

Hi Community!

This is my very first forum post! As we all know, this lifestyle can be a little expensive with toys, collars, outfits, travel in some cases, etc. Is there a consensus on whether the Dom/Master/Daddy or sub/save/littlegirl is supposed to pay for certain things? I'd love to hear how others have handled this!

❤ PrincessSunshine