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everyone has a joke in them let's hear your fav

Dellydoodah​(neither female)
2 years ago • 05/17/2020 2:22 am
Dellydoodah​(neither female) • 05/17/2020 2:22 am
My mate got rushed into hospital,They pulled ten toy horses a few fences and a couple of buildings out of his arse.The doctors say his condition is now stable.
Stevevo​(dom male)
2 years ago • 05/17/2020 6:25 am
Stevevo​(dom male) • 05/17/2020 6:25 am
How do you catch a unique rabbit? Unique up on him.


How do you catch a tame rabbit?

The tame way.
Sir Don​(dom male){Not availa}
2 years ago • 05/17/2020 7:25 am
Sir Don​(dom male){Not availa} • 05/17/2020 7:25 am
Okay here goes this is a bit long:::::::

Little Johnny gets up on a Saturday morning , mom is cleaning the house .. he starts pulling out toys and playing... mom says i can't cllean the house you are messing it up faster than i can clean.. you are going to have go outside and play.. Johnny goes outside.
3 hours later he comes in to eat liunch...
Mom- what have you been doing?
Johnny- i was watching them build the house
across the street.
Mom- did you learn anything?
Johnny- Yes i did!!!!!! I learned how to hang a
door.
Mom- Very nice , tell me about it..
Johnny - well first thing you do is, you put the motherfucker up like this, you shift the son of bitch this way then you shift the son of bitch that way and then you nail the god damn thing..
Mom- oh my god Johnny , i have never hesrd suvh language from a child ... GO TO YOUR ROOM UNTIL YOUR FATHERS GETS HOME!!!!!
A little while later dad comes home...after mom informs him that he needs to talk to Johnny.
Dad goes in to Johnny's room and asks what he did????
Johnny says. I learned how to hang a door today!!!!!!๐Ÿ˜Š๐Ÿ˜Š
Dad- Really tell me about it.๐Ÿ™‚๐Ÿ™‚
Johnny- well the first you do is, you put the motherfucker up like this, then you shift the son of bitch this way and then you shift the son of bitch that way. then you nail the god damn thing.
Dad- johnny i have never heard such language from a child... go outside and get me a switch
Johnny - looks at dad and says " fuck you jack that's a electricians job.....
Sir Don​(dom male){Not availa}
2 years ago • 05/17/2020 4:43 pm
Sir Don​(dom male){Not availa} • 05/17/2020 4:43 pm
Two truck driver talking.. one female ,one male.
The male says to the female how much he would like to take her out and have dinner .. and goes on and on. Female says she doesn't think her husband would appreciate it.. male says he doesn't have to know.... he is relentless and finally the the female says ... do you know the difference between a woman and a egg mcmuffin? The male thinks for a minute and finally says "No"..
The female says well if that's the case i definitely will not go out with you
ThirtyFourPointFive​(dom male)
2 years ago • 05/17/2020 4:50 pm
ThirtyFourPointFive​(dom male) • 05/17/2020 4:50 pm
One day, an Elephant is walking thru the jungle and comes up on a big hole. He hears a "squeak squeak", looks down and there is a Mouse at the bottom of the hole.

"Hey man, what are ya doing down there?" The Mouse says " Well, I'm stuck down in this fucking hole and I can't get out. You get me out and you'll be my friend for life."
The Elephant says " No Problem, I'll just drop my big cock down into the hole and you can climb out on my cock.
So the Elephant "straddles the hole, drops his big cock down in the hole and the mouse climbs out. "Thanks man, you are my friend for life!."

One day, this same mouse is walking thru the jungle and comes upon this same big hole. He hears an awful noise, looks down and here is this same Elephant at the bottom of the hole.

"Hey man, what are ya doing down there?" The Elephant says " Well, I'm stuck down in this fucking hole and I can't get out. You get me out and you'll be my friend for life."
The Mouse says " No problem, I go back to the house, get my Corvette and I'll pull you out."
So the Mouse gets his Corvette, backs up to the hole, ties a rope around the bumper, the Elephant ties himself to the rope and the mouse pulls him out. " Thanks man, you are my friend for life!"

So, Do you know what the moral of the story is?

If you've got a big cock, you don't need a Corvette.
ThirtyFourPointFive​(dom male)
2 years ago • 05/17/2020 4:57 pm
ThirtyFourPointFive​(dom male) • 05/17/2020 4:57 pm
skyrich wrote:
tallslenderguy wrote:
A horse walks in and sits at a bar, bartender asks: "why the long face?"


A termite walks into a bar and asks: "Hey, is the bar tender here?"

--------------

Renรฉ Descartes walks into a bar and orders a whisky.
The bartender asks: "Do you want ice with that?"
Renรฉ replies: "I think not" and disappeared!


A Ham and Cheese Sandwich walks into a bar, the bartender looks at him and says
"Sorry, we don't serve food here."


Last edited by * on Sun May 17, 2020 5:05 pm, edited 1 time in total