Online now
Online now

What is one question that turns you off to a potential?

↑ ↓
Onlinedomguy​(dom male)
8 months ago • 08/15/2020 1:27 am
Onlinedomguy​(dom male) • 08/15/2020 1:27 am
I have not had any single question turn me off. I understand why the examples already provided would do so however. I think for me the thing that does it is when they can not articulate, who they are and why they are seeking what ever it is they are. I also do not enjoy it when it becomes obvious they reached out to me without spending anytime on my proflle or reading any of my posts in forums. Recently I was contacted by someone who obviously took the time to check me out a bit and see what I am about. That is a sure way to get my attention. In this case, I had already done the same with her so when she contacted me, and let me know why she decided to reach out to me, it was a very good start!
EvilLittleVampBrat​(switch female)
8 months ago • 08/15/2020 1:59 am
EvilLittleVampBrat​(switch female) • 08/15/2020 1:59 am
What are you looking for exactly? (Despite my profile’s existence that goes into it.)

What are you going to do to entertain me? (Before we’ve gotten to really know each other enough to be jumping ahead.)

Is there anything that you want to ask me? (It makes me feel as though they don’t have anything to say and so want me to keep doing all the work.)

Do you want to be my submissive? (Literally within the first day or so.)

Why aren’t you responding? (Double messaging minutes apart.)

Are you a true submissive? (Why would you ask someone that? It’s subjective now, isn’t it?)
LongerJohnny​(dom male)
8 months ago • 08/15/2020 7:13 am

Re: What is the one question that turns you off to a potenti

LongerJohnny​(dom male) • 08/15/2020 7:13 am
dragonlover wrote:
What brought you to bdsm/kink? I really hate this question. I think it’s because I both wanted and feared kink and what I’d learn about myself. But when I get asked this I have no idea what to say even though I know the answers and I feel like that’s the lazy way to find out about it. It’s so much more complex than a simple answer/conversation can convey, at least for me. I’d prefer something like what has been the most surprising self discovery you’ve made since starting this lifestyle? Or what’s the thing you need the most from a dom/sub? Or this is why I joined the community and I’d like to hear your thoughts about what interested you the most when you discovered kink? Many people ask for information without giving any or any interest in actual conversation and learning about each other and that’s sketch to me.


I like your suggestions for alternate questions.
The thing about this that gets to me is that either I or they have no idea what is being asked. I had my eyes opened to it, I learned more about it, but I wasn't "brought to BDSM/kink."
It is not one of those things that is acquired or achieved, rather it always exists, always has existed, naturally, inside a person (or not, depending on the person.) I think it could be likened to any question of identity, sexual or otherwise. Why not ask "What brought you to being heterosexual, or poly, or a Dom, or a pet, or GF, or whatever you are?"
Imagine it like this: BDSM/kink is a wardrobe, not a change of clothes. Maybe BDSM/kink is the unmarked vehicle that brought me to a new lifestyle - but I didn't name the car until I had arrived.
A poor analogy perhaps, but does that make any sense?
hank submissive male​(sub male)
8 months ago • 08/21/2020 9:12 pm
hank submissive male​(sub male) • 08/21/2020 9:12 pm
I know the question tell me about yourself is trite but I would like to know the woman in control as a person if there is anything she left out of her profile
I in turn will answer questions about my self but there has to be some give and take
shortylotus
7 months ago • 08/23/2020 6:04 pm
shortylotus • 08/23/2020 6:04 pm
Ugh
"If you really are a naughty girl you would send me a video of you putting your panties in your mouth" (me after doing two hours of yard work feeling puzzled and slightly nervous looking down my pants) "MAYBE YOU CAN SHOW ME EXACTLY HOW YOU WANT IT DONE? NOW TAKE THOSE BOXERS OFF AND MAKE IT HOT!"
shortylotus
7 months ago • 08/23/2020 6:12 pm
shortylotus • 08/23/2020 6:12 pm
my second favorite meet and greet question
"TELL ME YOU HOTTEST KINK SO I CAN DO IT FOR YOU!"

I WILL GIVE YOU A HINT....IT INVOLVES YOU GETTING A HOT AND WET.....DOING MY DISHES....AND IF YOU REALLY WANT TO PLEASE ME...YOU CAN DO MY LAUNDRY ALL DAY BABY
Tthomas
7 months ago • 08/23/2020 10:20 pm
Tthomas • 08/23/2020 10:20 pm
My two favorites are.....

Where do you see yourself in 5 years? Like I am applying for a state job.

What would you do if I did this? How would you punish me? This is in the first conversation without knowing anything about her.
I'mME
2 months ago • 01/27/2021 6:24 pm
I'mME • 01/27/2021 6:24 pm
Turn off question,

This is a huge turn off for me, to be the first question after a salutation.

"What are you in to?"


WellI am into being treated like I am a human being, not a fetish buffet or kink taste testing.

🤣😂
SubAtomic
2 months ago • 01/27/2021 6:48 pm
SubAtomic • 01/27/2021 6:48 pm
Opening Line: I know your profile says "blah blah blah" but

But? Really? Sigh. Why do you suppose I spelled out whatever you are trying to wiggle around in my profile?