tallslenderguy(other male) |
3 years ago •
Oct 18, 2020
3 years ago •
Oct 18, 2020
tallslenderguy(other male) • Oct 18, 2020
i believe anyone , on either side of the D/s dynamic, needs to learn who they are and be true to their self. The second thing, i think, is one has to learn how to be open and communicate who you are and what you need/want (on both sides of the dynamic). Openness is vulnerability, to me it is a gauge of maturity and seriousness. Someone who wants to Dom or sub instantly is likely running on hormones... which are not bad things, but a relationship needs a wee bit more to sustain it.
i love what DrWakko proffers: "...a kink relationship starts with a strong vanilla foundation." i think there is a lot of truth in that, you have to eat and watch t.v. too. To me, there is often this frenzied approach to D/s like we have to always lead with our highest cards, but that is not always a winning strategy. i think honest openness with oneself and the desired other, the nakedness of that, reveals a great deal. If the person responds in kind, i think there is a lot of potential, but it takes two to make a relationship. i don't think any of this is possible without step A, self knowledge. One cannot disclose what they do not know or are unaware of. And that's not a static position, it's an ongoing process. Add a new person (Dom or sub) and suddenly there is someone there reflecting you and the opportunity for self knowledge becomes endless i think... but a lot of people give out when they see how much work it is. |
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