| PrevalingMaster(dom male) |
5 years ago •
Aug 14, 2018
PrevalingMaster wrote: In my experience - even here on the Cage - its funny that i hear my level of sensual dominace is too INTENSE. To me these sub( so called) women are very fragile, and their relationships or marriages are often doomed to caducity unless they are fortunate to have a TRUE DOMINANT man. Very few men belong to this category. As i am one - ( That true Dom ) I would seek a dialogue for a compromise, but with the FEAR FACTOR and given the fact of not being open or ego gratification - The right channel of ( mental - in person - even via phone) communication becomes useless. Those women are so dominant ( due to fear - nature) that it has to be their way or no way. Its Ironic - that one wanted to have an in depth conversation via text - be it in indulged- then i asked would it not be better IF you called ME...so we can actually speak?
Then the usual reply - my phone is broken - cannot call - and Poof like Mgr. Nelson and I dream of Jennie - they are GONE! They view compromise as something condescending and as an insult....me talk live? How Dare you!! Look - that being said, finding a dominant man is a tricky business... Do you people think a woman has to send obvious signals or can a dominant man see through her ( even on line) and really find out who she is? No man, not even a dominant one, can read minds ( only the Shadow knows...)Each time I presented myself as a man with a bit of a sensual dominant/daddy side, it seemed to attract women for all the wrong reasons. And so far, it attracted many types of women, except those - who call themselves submissive!!! My conclusion is that there is clearly something( like the Feminine Mystique) I don’t get. Does a woman like a man like me WHO is asking - Do you need a man to by physically dominant? Do you want old-fashioned chivalry from a Dominant? Are you looking for a Dominant man who will take an active role in directing the relationship? If you are ...then let me know! ( smiles) 8/15 as a Post Script - there was a woman on the Cage seeking for a Daddy Dom in the area - after chatting i read in her reply to me that she wanted assistance.( Danger Will Robinson) and I asked if it was FINANCIAL - that if so - she is in the wrong classification - to wit she replied and i quote - ????? but ofc if you are offering, and it is important to you to do that (by all means! I enjoy shopping for my choo's) As Arsenio used to say - Things that make you go HMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM! |
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Hisgoodgirljenna(sub female)
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5 years ago •
Aug 19, 2018
This is the best advice JackMeoff987 wrote: Don't trust anyone who claims to be a Dom until you spend a long time talking to him. Check him out, see what he likes and doesn't. If all he likes is blow jobs and wants you to spend the rest of your life on your knees RUN. Dig into his head and see if he's someone that seeks your fulfillment, and your growth in sex and in general. If he wants things his way or no way RUN.
A good Dom will seek to expand your boundaries both in and outside the bedroom but will allow you to use your ultimate weapon, the power to say no. If he continues after you say no then he's an abuser and RUN. A good protection from abuse is to work out a contract. The contract needs to line out your soft limits and your hard limits. It is not abuse for you to both agree on working to expand your limits, it is abuse when you say no and he does it anyway. The contract should include the safe words and that they will be respected. If the Dom breaks any of the things in the contract that they did not discuss with you ahead of time, leave. Plan how and when you will be submissive and in what roles you will be free. The contract gives you both a framework that you can build a relationship around. It is this relationship that will turn into trust. If is that trust that will turn into submission. One can't happen without the other. It is the abusers that will seek to hasten and rush this process that MUST develop over time. That's one key to spotting them. Be careful because your trusting not only your body but your spirit, how you perceive yourself and your own self worth. Do Not give this power to anyone until you are sure that you both are on the same page and reading the same thing. But most of all do not give this until you trust them not to harm what you give. P.S. never trust anyone who seeks absolute control over you body, spirit and mind. Experienced Dom know that these are given as gifts over time, the abusers seek them give at the beginning. |
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iluv2read4life69(sub female)
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5 years ago •
Aug 23, 2018
Re: Hard for both Hisgoodgirljenna wrote: I think it’s difficult for both sides for many different reasons; finding the right fit, using text messages and profiles, and then finding out about lies and deception.
Unfortunately there are many people who are not honest and that tends to distort things, creates apprehension, and suspicion. In some cases it’s easy to tell who is fake but with some it is difficult. So, with that said, I think we all need to use discernment and be aware of any possible red flags. At the same time continue looking, being open, kind, and considerate. Use every situation/experience as a lesson to learn something and keep moving forward towards what you are looking for. Don’t get discouraged! I met a Dom who asked for a picture of me holding the peace sign to be sure that I was real. At first I thought it was odd but then it hit me, he didn't ask for a nude picture! We have been talking for a couple of days and other than a brief discussion about sex (maybe 6 text messages long) we have talked about everything else. I didn't think about how much fakery might be out there but you are right we all need to be careful. |
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dollMaker(dom male)
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5 years ago •
Aug 23, 2018
Fine words and saying all the right things does not a good or safe Dom make. My advice talk to the subs who have been around the Cage awhile, subs like Aria, alawey and others who can provide some degree of verification that those fine words and saying the right things reflect a decent individual or just someone who knows how to say the right things to hide their true self, which is not the sort of person you would want to get involved with.
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JJMSTR(dom male)
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5 years ago •
Sep 11, 2018
There's so many different opinions on this blog. One says run if all he wants is your mind, soul, another is saying that the woman are scared of some.
The more I read the more I wonder myself what is it we are trying to achieve here.? Our roles as doms and desires are to be in control of our subs actions. Lead them to ecstasy for themselves and ours. When you meet your sub via phone, text, email, snail mail how ever you do, you come to mutual agreement of what's their role male or female is. You come to an understanding that as their "SIR/Master" they in turn live as a sub(subservant). Is this not what it stands for.? If your just role playing; that is not a true Dom sub your not. Doms take there position seriously, we enjoy the scent of a woman and her fear of the unexplored. We take pride in ownership of a sub and how we see fit to train them. Is it about sexual dominance, in some scenarios ,yes, is it about a passion and feeling between 1 or more, yes. Myself I met a woman who brought out the Dom in me, that was always there. She wanted me to completely dominate her in every way. Sexually , physically and mentally. With that said she is my greatest treasure and I adore her body, mind and soul respectively. To go off and say we are pshyco or wacko would be wrong. Some women/men want a person to take the reigns per say and lead them any way they want to be led. Others wants a mutual training and guidance. Some just want to fuck. Someone stated a Dom doesn't want photos or see your tits. Your right that's not what (I) want. I want your body, I want your mind but most of all I want you by my side looking up at me with those needing eyes begging for my touch. Do all Doms agree on how they treat(care) for there subs.. I think not. But what we can agree I believe on is that we cherish the sexual and mental relationship we have(own) with our subs. I'm no crazy man, but I take pleasure in the ecstacy(pain/training/release) i see and get from my sub. Is it hard to find us, NO, is it difficult to find someone that fits your desire? Yes. Every one of us is different. You must ask of us what it is you really want. You'll find the right one. Don't be afraid to release your fear and reach out to us and let us listen to your inner self and sexual desires. We all want the same thing. Belonging and acceptance and need to be filled by our hands. Mstr J If you agree or don't it's your opinion and mine. That's why we have a blog, our opinions are like assholes, we all have one. |
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GEORGE TG(dom male)
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5 years ago •
Sep 13, 2018
Being natural dominant what i have found here is that women are too edgy and easily confuse a dynamic dominant as.... shallow or even offensive.
Well if there is a dominant man that a woman cannot recognise that is not really always a doms issue. My view is that plenty of Doms arround but not as many sub women. Not it my general vicinity anyway... Also i should add that many women think that a dominant man is like something they have seen in some movie or read in some book creating a specific fantasy.... I lough at that reality because every man and every rrlatioship has a dynamic of its own... Women of such missconception never get what they seek for. I must say i don t watch movies or read books of this sort.... Real life is not like the movies... wake up. If you want a dom like you wish then you are not really a sub but a hidden domme.... jmho.... Sorry for any hard feelings, Been put in that corner before. Ahhhh also.... Those film currated girls seek to be sub when they really are normal or too fragille.... I guess its female fantacy really mostly than real need. |
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Asteria(neither female)
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5 years ago •
Sep 13, 2018
Most of women here, and during my time here I have talked to quite a few of them, are being edgy because of few things. Let me point some of them out: not reading their profiles; lack of respect and good manners; approaching them like they were YOUR submissives, not a human being that is equal to you. Those are for starters, the truth is that this list is very long and pretty sad.
"If you want a dom like you wish then you are not really a sub but a hidden domme" Seriously? So a submissive is supposed to settle, submit to whoever comes her way, just because if she won't then she is not a real submissive? I am not sure if you realise how much this sentence tells about you. And no, I am sorry, but this is not the best impression you could have made. |
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GEORGE TG(dom male)
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5 years ago •
Sep 13, 2018
I understand you astreria and you are right
We agree on all. I think its mostly a communication thing rather than a dissagreement 
On my side i understand and appologise the way i come out. Maybe by poor expression. What i am trying to relay here is that when women are so edgy and take everything and all in a offensive way they react like a domme. I guess the way you put it, rightfully so. I never said any woman should be with the first dom on sight not at all so. Every person is equal and should be with the one that makes her/him happy. A relationship of any form must be one that brings ballance to both
I would be happy to ellaborate further and make this whole missanderstanding go. What i was meaning was a reply to some women not finding the right dom because they sometimes equally search in a wrong way being overly reserved if that makes any sense. If you want to know i take no girl as my submissive in the way you imply. In reality the whole meaning for this deeply for me is have a girl submit by her own feelings. In anyother form its not any good to me. I am not a chain man and really nothing like i have been received. Be well and thankbyou for the reply. If you feel my distance with you and subs in genneral, concerning this matter, a distance in perception/expression after this reply of mine is still big i will be happy to engage more in the topic. Was well meant and replying in regards to the difficulty of the subject tittle, poorly it seems. Ahh maybe i am improving my ways also but inside i am not like what you think. Now to make things a bit more clearrer, that sentence you put in exclamations was written for a woman that was overly bossy and somewhat insultive in communication. Do you feel that its the right way really to approach a dom ? Peace !
We are all here for good. |
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CrimsonPaw
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5 years ago •
Sep 13, 2018
Oh the times I wish I could tag Fudbar, Aria or Phanes in a post, this would be one. **Bangs head on wall**
George, are you sure that's the best way to go about this scenario? *Facepalm* |
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Asteria(neither female)
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5 years ago •
Sep 13, 2018
@ GEORGE TG,
You are right, there is some (pretty significant) misunderstanding here, but not in the place where you're looking for it. "What i was meaning was a reply to some women not finding the right dom because they sometimes equally search in a wrong way being overly reserved if that makes any sense." Being overly reserved is necessary. It is very sad, but true. Way too many people want to try to abuse and lie in the name of BDSM. Many of us, submissives (but it is probably the same for some Dominants) have been hurt in the past (some of us pretty badly). Many of us have been approached by fakes and douchebags. So then, we build our walls and try to stay guarded. Don't be surprised that our superior value is pretty often our safety. Both, physical _and_ emotional. If you want to build D/s relationship, you need to be aware that this does not happen overnight. It takes time. Sometimes weeks, but sometimes even months. Of course, that's not applicable for everyone - if someone is looking for casual play, some fun and have no issues whatsoever, then it can be immediate - but I would not call it D/s. Also, if a Dominant is not very experienced, he (or she) needs to educate himself / herself in the first place. Talking to people about their experiences, searching for stuff to read etc. should be done before searching for a submissive. |
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