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Brats

Boetius​(dom male)
3 years ago • Mar 15, 2021
Boetius​(dom male) • Mar 15, 2021
LunarEclipse wrote:
You only consider it "well reasoned and articulate" because it aligns with your views.

Unless you can read my mind to show otherwise, you are greatly mistaken.

LunarEclipse wrote:
Opinions are very different from facts.

So ... I guess that means your opinion on this matter is untrue. Your line of thought is irrational.

LunarEclipse wrote:
The reason I chose to share the educational materials above is because they are neutral and highlight points on both sides.

As this is your opinion, and as you have established that opinions are not facts, it follows that your stated opinion is false. (I love syllogisms as they lend to clarity of thought.)

The educational materials you posted do not render a viable answer for the problem expressed by the OP, whereas suggestions posted by SubtleHush do so. Keep in mind the 'brats' are the ones with a problem, not the Doms who avoid them.
ElizaEmma​(sub female){NotLooking}
3 years ago • Mar 15, 2021

Re: Brats

Let's get back to what the OP wrote:

LittleSubFox wrote:
Why is it that the second I say I'm a brat, people run? ...

Also, before anyone tries to make assumptions, this is not about just one person... This is a continuous dilemma for me. It's really disheartening when you try to make a connection with someone and the second you say you're a brat... they either stop replying, or immediately say, "I don't deal with brats." I'm truly upset and hurt that some brats have become almost a bad thing. I'm not bad...

It is a waste of time to play the blame game, whether it is the brat or the DD's problem. Has everyone forgotten: Your kink is not my kink but your kink is OK? Personally I cannot stand DD/lg or any kind of age play, so yes, I will probably run the minute someone say they are a DD and with exactly the same explanation, "I don't do age play".

The issue is not you being a brat, but the kind of people you are dealing with. Depends on how deep you are in the "getting to know you" stage, just stop replying for whatever reason is rude. However, it is everyone's prerogative not to go further if your kinks don't align. It has nothing to do with good or bad. I don't like short men with lots of facial hair. I am sure I have missed opportunities to connect with some very nice ones, but that's the choice I make and I don't get to whine about it.
Boetius​(dom male)
3 years ago • Mar 15, 2021
Boetius​(dom male) • Mar 15, 2021
LunarEclipse wrote:
So by the same token then one could say that Daddy Doms are the problem, not the subs who avoid them?

You can say what you will; however, I am unaware of Doms complaining for the lack of brats who will accept them. Until you can show otherwise, your statement is specious.
WhiteRoses​(sub female)
2 years ago • Dec 7, 2021
WhiteRoses​(sub female) • Dec 7, 2021
LittleSubFox wrote:
Imagine what it would be like if two brats decide to get together and make a sub/Dom relationship out of that xD Absolute chaos


I did, it was the best thing ever. She and I are still best friends even if the dynamics have changed.
Spellbound Wytch{Mr. Parker}
2 years ago • Dec 7, 2021
SirsBabyDoll wrote:
I actually DO know a Dom brat and he is married to a Sub brat and they have THE BEST relationship!


This concept stopped me in my tracks. I'm not one who has any interest in those who boast of their brattiness and demand their flavor of kink be recognized and accepted by anyone but themselves - BUT could you please explain to me what kind of behavior does a "bratty dom" indulge in? I'm not being a smart ass. I am genuinely interested in how a dom brat behaves. Thanks in advance.
Spellbound Wytch{Mr. Parker}
2 years ago • Dec 7, 2021

Re: Brats

ElizaEmma wrote:
Let's get back to what the OP wrote:

The issue is not you being a brat, but the kind of people you are dealing with. Depends on how deep you are in the "getting to know you" stage, just stop replying for whatever reason is rude. However, it is everyone's prerogative not to go further if your kinks don't align. It has nothing to do with good or bad. I don't like short men with lots of facial hair. I am sure I have missed opportunities to connect with some very nice ones, but that's the choice I make and I don't get to whine about it.


This is such an important distinction and I'm frankly astonished that so many people seemingly overlook the fact that not every dominant is interested in so called "brat taming". If a dominant person has no interest in being met with resistance on a regular basis - if a dominant person has no interest in back talking (even if "playful"), why do so many brat types feel that all the uninterested dominants need to do is work harder at reading some "educational material" in order to get insight into the "whys" of their chosen behavior?

Frankly, I've never seen any subset of kink that works harder and longer than "brats" at insisting how misunderstood they are and that the REAL solution is for everyone else to take time to do an in depth psychological evaluation of their histories and concede that they really need to be resistant and challenging and that everyone else needs to jump on the bandwagon and indulge them. Whew. As harsh as that comes across, it's what I see between the lines of nearly every rebuttal that's been posted here from the brat contingent.

In conclusion, I agree with ElizaEmma that everyone should be able to pick and choose the types of people they want to interact with and not be told they're not giving a certain segment of the kink world a fair enough shake.
SirsBabyDoll​(sub female){Pizza+☕}
2 years ago • Dec 7, 2021

Re: Brats

WytchyWoman wrote:


Frankly, I've never seen any subset of kink that works harder and longer than "brats" at insisting how misunderstood they are and that the REAL solution is for everyone else to take time to do an in depth psychological evaluation of their histories and concede that they really need to be resistant and challenging and that everyone else needs to jump on the bandwagon and indulge them. Whew. As harsh as that comes across, it's what I see between the lines of nearly every rebuttal that's been posted here from the brat contingent.

In conclusion, I agree with ElizaEmma that everyone should be able to pick and choose the types of people they want to interact with and not be told they're not giving a certain segment of the kink world a fair enough shake.


I can understand your position, however, one reason that Brats advocate so fiercely to be understood is because Brats are CONSTANTLY being kink shamed.

We are told that we are not true submissives and that we are just "bad", period. No, we (as people) aren't "bad". When your whole value as a PERSON is constantly being degraded and maligned, you tend to get a bit defensive. You know this to be true yourself. How many times have you seen "witch" used to vilify the practice of ALL witchcraft? Having been a sole practicioner as well as a member of a coven, I have experienced it myself.

People don't wake up saying "oh! I wanna try Bratism." There are no trainings and no workshops to attend. Brats are women who have experienced trauma. Would a soldier with PTSD be told to "stop being so sensitive! Get over the pain. Get over the fear. Get over your trust issues."

Nope. They would be "understood".

Brats aren't treated that way tho. We are told we are bad, as people. When a submissive feels they have disobeyed their Dom, they feel shame at their "bratty" behavior.

That is what we are fighting against, being shamed for our pain.
ButterfliesAndCuffs​(sub female)
2 years ago • Dec 7, 2021
I’m just going to jump in here and say I can see both sides. I understand brats feeling attacked because of some of the comments made. It’s one thing to say that the dynamic isn’t for you, but if it works for others then be happy for them.

On the other hand, there are doms who love being brat tamers and those that like good girls. Then there are the ones who like a little of each. None of these preferences are wrong.

It doesn’t do anyone any good to try to convince someone you know them better than they do. As long as everything is safe, sane, and consensual, it’s all good to me.

Side note: It’s been enlightening to me that some things I’ve talked about with doms have been considered bratty by some doms and very punishable, a little funny but punishable, or something that would result in a serious talk. Doms are so very different. All of these scenarios should of course be worked out in negotiations before any misunderstandings about behavior happened.