What if there's no fulfillment possible?
3 months ago • 04/11/2021 12:36 am
Vengeance • 04/11/2021 12:36 am
I'm new here and I can't seem to find any answers to my questions. It's as if nobody talks about it or maybe they just leave their relationships so I never hear about it. Either way, I'm so very happily married. My husband is amazing and he's the love of my life. But I have other needs, ones that he just doesn't seem to understand. I've been burying them for decades, since I was just a teen, and then, thanks to a horribly written book full of misconceptions, I was at least able to look into more things without getting stared at as if I'm a freak.
So now I'm attempting to talk to my husband and get him interested in learning more. I have a profession that allows me to study many of the aspects of BDSM and kink so I've been throwing myself into my work to help others, but this need of mine is like a horrible itch under my skin and I'm trying to find a way to give it up. I'm just not sure if I can. I'm willing to shut down this side of myself for my husband. He really is a very good man. It just feels like there is this constant emptiness. I'm sure that sounds dramatic, but I don't know how else to describe it. I actually even asked him if I could hire a professional for non-sexual interaction and he was against it. He only sees it as sexual and I don't, but he doesn't buy it. So... I guess I'm just looking for advice or mostly some support? Maybe a pat on the head and a heartfelt "there, there" is all I can really ask for right now.