2 weeks ago • 04/28/2021 9:22 pm
SubtleHush(sub female) • 04/28/2021 9:22 pm
Since I can see that many here have a handle on debating this I will offer some other realities as they relate to your time online pre ghosting, post-ghosting and in general, screwing around.
The Internet is no longer a mindless box (think ATM) where you get to have fun. I don't think it ever was.
Online activity has cost people their marriages, custody of children and jobs. (no personal contact with others needed.)
When the police come to arrest you the first thing they take is your c.o.m.p.u.t.e.r.
When last I spoke to my FBI friend, he said that they can take a formatted had drive (that's were you wipe the drive) and pull all that data anyway. I'm told the CIA has ways to do that as well. Probably our friends at Homeland Security too.
People have been murdered after meeting on the Internet.
I don't think I have to explain identity theft to anyone.
And Internet scamming? I believe that is a million or more dollar industry now.
Oh and one of my favorites. More than a few people of different ages have committed suicide due to cyber bullying.
Behavioral scientists (my field of study) have been looking closely at this for a while now. Not to mention the ramifications and ethical codes of conduct that have had to be rewritten due to online counseling, and online medical diagnosis. Those rules affect licensure should a practitioner screw up.
So in a nut shell, what you do, how, and with whom online matters.
I know none of this was the point of the original post but you know someone had to be the party pooper (you're welcome) and I'm happy to oblige.
We all know that women are frequently bombarded with urgent requests and promises. Speaking for myself, if I had a penny every time some top type descended on me making promises, demanding full disclosure on personal questions, (some beyond pornographic), Wanted cam with me, demanded to be called MasterSirLordGodoftheUniverse, and became hateful and billigerent when told NO. I'd have a mansion built out of pennies.
It matters. It is no longer a fly-by dalliance. People ask the person on the other side of that computer to dig deep and they want all your secrets, fears and phobias. They poke and prod and root around in that person's emotions and then when bored, and ghost.
So if you said, "just get over it" you only sound as indifferent and selfish as the ghosters are.
Early on a great mentor of mine told me this.
"The true measure of a man is what he does when no one is looking."
(I added and what he does when he/she doesn't have to do anything at all."
Another great read is "As a man thinketh" by James Allen 1888
"Circumstances don't make the man, they reveal him"
.............simply put if you act like a dick and deliberately hurt people, you are a dick. Own it, believe it, soak in it until you fingers get all pruney.
You are hurting people not because you have no alternative. You are doing it because you want to.
THAT is why it matters. THAT is why it always will.