1 year ago • Jan 14, 2022
tallslenderguy(other male) • Jan 14, 2022
I guess I see it quite differently. Like I said if it works for someone else that's their business but I don't see how anyone with any self esteem could be okay with their partner openly having sex with another. I just don't see how that works with a healthy self worth. I hope you don't mind the frank discussion, some may not be in the mood and consider it preachy, which is not my intent.
Since you don't mind frank discussions, I'll mention that a good number of people would have a hard time understanding how licking someone's butthole is a healthy expression of self esteem. Along with innumerable other things some of us do regularly as we pursue our various kinks. In short, sometimes people don't see the forest for the trees when it comes to defending their own brand while looking askance at another. My big thing is the use of the word "forced" as in - *she made me do it!* and that has been a recurrent theme in this discussion.
i've been working, so limited time, and just read more of the recent comments in this thread.
i too have some speed bumps with the term "forced."
There was a time in my life when i was conflicted about being gay and about many of my needs and desires that went along with that. i had an ongoing fantasy of being kidnapped by a guy, taken to His home, kept captive and being 'forced' to do a whole detailed list of things on a regular basis. The "force" part (for me) was not really force at all, it was a way around my own lack of self acceptance.
It seems to me that if one is expressing a desire to be forced, it is no longer force? Or at least it removes a major factor out of force: the violation of ones volition. Doing something one does not want to do is not the same as being forced to do something against ones will. In the first case, the will is not violated if the person 'willfully' wants to be made to do _______________.