One of those annoying, "eye-rolling" questions.

neutrinozero • Jul 16, 2021

i have to follow orders at work and make my bosses happy or they will replace me; is that what your talking about?

(p.s. don't try bear spray, tourists get in trouble that way, i just try to listen to the park rangers when they tell me to turn around and go back to where it's safe for humans)

neutrinozero • Jul 16, 2021

or????
are you talking about a what's a sub? what's a dom? idk? now i am confused
( some people may seem like posers, but they just stepped on the wrong field)

neutrinozero • Jul 16, 2021

or forgot to wear their knee pads and elbow pads at the skate park?

neutrinozero • Jul 17, 2021

900 not for me,

still
searching
for
my
nirvana

neutrinozero • Jul 17, 2021

respect for those that did

Taramafor​(sub male) • Aug 28, 2021

Reminder: The question isn't is if it's for you. The question is, is it POSSIBLE.


Everything we think say and do is based on how we interact with others. Even if not thought about/considered. When you say "Submissive for" I'm going to interpret that as "Following their instructions".

People open up to me all the time. Even more then with their owners. Why is this?

People gain spines. They get stronger. When I call them weak and pathetic when they're fragile and evasive. I would have to say I make that happen. Not them.

Hmm... Ok, now let's think about how one can do it themselves. Can you "Dom yourself" to "Sub yourself?" Well, oddly enough, yes. You can.

So how? Hmm... Well, you have to break. In the worst ways. And learn to embrace "everything". To learn to not fear the unknown. And that kind of skill and talent, it does not come overnight. Not on your own.

Once mastered though, you can direct yourself. "Accept" and "submit" to any situation. While still having a spine and standing your ground as you challenge the logic of others (honesty will always be the main factor). No matter how "dom" they might be. And once mastered you can also wrap subs around your finger. Or people that aren't either.

Those answers, they come from inside ourselves. And a good dom lets you find your own answers. They can guide you. But in the end you're your own prisoner. Or otherwise are able to free yourself from the chains that bind you that stop you from getting what you want.

Possible? Yes. Easy without support? No.

A Cloud​(sub female){Owned} • Sep 9, 2021

Wow - somewhat heated! It's very hard to express such complex ideas and emotions into words that will convey to readers [of the human kind] the intended meaning. Go easy and avoid assumptions.

I think being submissive is not so..... absolute. Like everything, all forms of meaning, feeling, expression and BEING, I believe submission is a spectrum and can be experienced and lived in many different ways. I feel there is sometimes an attitude of judgement for those who don't 'live and breathe' D/s, as if there are those who just 'play' at being submissive, and they're not really submissive - it's not in their 'soul'. Well, in my opinion, not all things are just known. There is discovery; there are starting points; there are long meandering journeys that take a person to the most unexpected places. Go easy and remember your expression of D/s is different to the myriad of ways it is lived by others.

Some people might say I am not a true submissive because I fell upon it, because I am new and naive, because it's mainly expressed in play, because I can switch a bit. I can only be submissive when I am in that headspace and my headspace can change like the weather in Melbourne. It does take a skilled person to get me there [thanks to my oppositional defiance tendencies and a certain "Don't tell me what to do! Go sort out your own shit out!" button that comes with the territory (but really, I am very sweet ). My point here is that yes, I do see myself as submissive; however, others may not. But I don't care. It's like art for me: if I say it's art - it is ART, if someone perceives it as art - it is ART (Can of worms right there ).

There is no right and wrong..... unless you're a teacher who has to adhere to the curriculum and refer to the answer sheet. Oh please, let's not bring that failing system here .

Expression comes in many forms and sexual expression is soooooo complex and grounded in contexts that are unknown by our closest humans let alone acquaintances and strangers. If it doesn't cause harm to one's self or others, express away - who am I to judge?

I will stop my indulgent rant after my final [and actually relevant] point....
I think submission can be expressed without the Dominant party. This of course would have limitations, and it may be hard without much scope or experience. It would, I suppose, be more like self-work - exploring submission within yourself, finding what works and where you want to go. Erotic photography, some film and literature is great for getting ideas and seeing what turns you on. I love this side of things; discovery is so much fun! And the best thing is, coming to know and love yourself more.