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What to do?

keeblerkitty​(sub female){Looking}
2 years ago • Sep 26, 2021

What to do?

I am new here but....
I was thinking I may have found my Mr. Right Dominant only to find out that I think he is playing games. Unreachable on kik, said he had been hacked on kik and that he is going to delete the account but that account is not pitch black so according to kik it is still active, which means (according to kik) I have been blocked for whatever reason, which i found very upsetting because I also know I have done nothing wrong. So my question is just this: Do I wait to see if he actually gets this issue fixed or just move on? Today is day #2 of being what I called punished like this. If a Dominant does this shouldn't the submissive be told what she is being punished for and why?
If the Dominant is lying then what is he hiding. I have been a very open book about me and I really expect the same from a Dominant that I would take the time to get to know. Even though it has been a short time since we have been talking I really do miss His communications and his voice. No he has not called me to talk to me about whatever the issue may be or anything. I have point blank asked if I have done something wrong or said something that may have been taken out of context and asked to let me explain myself and apologize. I was told simply to stop panicking, and that did I receive His message about deleting kik.? First of all, I don't panic over anything, just not my style and I've been through to much in this life to panic about anything and to put it simply If I see or find an issue I will address it calmly and patiently...I don't like to be toyed with this way when it is uncalled for...I follow his rules such as they have been given to me or the ones that he said told me anyways...I address Him as Sir, his preferred name of which I am still getting used to saying again, I say good morning Sir, I say good night Sir, I give a list of my daily activities as per his request, When we have talked during the day I have said something without saying Sir but then retype it with the Sir address, He said once still working on that I see and I said yes absolutely. My main goal is to please Him in all things, what i say, how I act, speech, addressing Him correctly etc. No we have not met yet but I really am looking forward to that as we have a lot of the same interests, ideas, needs, wants, desires and must haves.

So what do I do here?
luvij
2 years ago • Sep 26, 2021
luvij • Sep 26, 2021
I feel your frustration and it does sound rather suspiciously odd behaviour on his part.
If I were in your shoes and really felt there was still potential after this; I would simply wait what I feel is a reasonable amount of time ( this depends on how long you’ve been talking and what you are comfortable with) and if there’s no word from him in your allotted time frame; then close the book and move onto something new. There could be many reasons why he is acting strangely; but that is not a reflection of anything you have or haven’t done. His decision and behaviour is only a reflection of his own agenda/outlook. Ultimately do what is authentic and right for yourself. Best of luck 😊
VelvetGlove​(dom male)
2 years ago • Sep 26, 2021
VelvetGlove​(dom male) • Sep 26, 2021
I think you're making excuses for this person. While I don't know all the details, I'd certainly consider moving on based on the facts you've presented.

It's far too easy to be deceived by partners in online-only "relationships". I put that word in quotes, not to denigrate those who get satisfaction from online partners, but to draw a line between those who we meet in person and come to know well irl and those who are mainly text on a screen. I'm not sure I even know those who I meet in person but at least I get a wealth of info about them in person that I may never get online. Maybe that's just me - I tend to read most people very clearly upon meeting them. My point is that anyone online who I suspect is lying to me immediately gets put into the discard pile. No offense, but I don't have time for deception when the core of D/s to me is honesty.
keeblerkitty​(sub female){Looking}
2 years ago • Sep 26, 2021
Thank you for the post and I agree honesty is always first in D/s relationships because it has to be. And I'm not interested in just an online thing. I want the "real life" in person face to face meet and then go from there.
Gaiawolf​(sub female){RogueWolf}
2 years ago • Sep 26, 2021
I'm sorry from only hearing your side I would go with he is playing games. If there are other ways to reach you besides kik then why is he basing all communication on that app? No one who is seriously invested is going to leave their sub hanging with absolutely no explanation of what is going on. Even a simple, I'm having a hard time and need space but you did nothing wrong wait for me, would be enough to give me patience to wait a couple days. But nothing, yeah 24 hours and I'm done. You deserve more respect and if he can't find time to either communicate or explain, then not worth your time or emotions. Just my thoughts.
Cressida Clytie​(masochist female){Taken}
2 years ago • Sep 27, 2021
I hope you don't mind if I share based on my experience. You can take what resonates or just ignore if it doesn't fit the scenario:

1. He is kind of busy with life and the LS is not his priority for now.
2. Did this happened on a weekend? And you have been talking with him during weekdays? Maybe he doesn't have privacy at home, probably married?
3. Something might have happened and it will take time for them to get back to you.

As what VelvetGlove said, you might have been making excuses for this person and that's normal because you already formed a bond with him. You are already hooked up. I hope you can decide soon and it will be for your own good. Communication is the most BASIC requirement in the LS or dynamic. I hope you will not get blinded and please do not ignore red flags.

Sending you peace of mind and hugs.
SammyJ​(sub female){collared}
2 years ago • Sep 27, 2021
I've had a few online dynamics. Based on what you said, and my experience, it appears he is not serious. If you are still interested then I suggest you see if he reaches out to you very soon and if not, move on. I know easier said then done. If he reaches out and you want to give it another go, then he better be excellent at communication from this point forward, in my opinion. Just be careful that you don't waste too much time. It's very disappointing and I understand how you feel. It took me quite sometime and a lot of heartache before my Dom found me.