Silver(sub female){not intere}
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6 years ago •
Mar 27, 2018
being in a long distance relationship adds additional stress to the relationship. it takes a lot of communication and one thing i discovered that helps the sub is having a sweatshirt or t-shirt with the Dominants scent on it and body odor. then when they feel stressed they can wear the shirt some even use it to sleep in. one Dominant i know of provides a bottle of His scent as well.
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Online now
LatexHer(dom male)
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6 years ago •
Mar 27, 2018
As I approach the Fall of my years, I can reflect upon this subject matter. I have trained and collared several lovely ladies over the years, including a wife or two. I have had the pleasure of exploring their submission with them, sometimes to point of failure! Yes, indeed a Dom may over or underestimate, even with good communication, the slaves/subs sincerity and commitment to training!
One such loss occurred in my early thirties as the woman wearing my collar chose to seek a relationship (marriage) instead of enjoying her submission and commitment to her collar! We went clubbing often at some dungeons on a regular basis where I had hoped to introduce her to more women wearing collars, other Masters/Doms to help her overcome some of her continued inhibitions! During the months where we attended these meetings, instead of embracing certain play, she became more convinced that the collar she once proudly wore was not suited for her. She asked me to consider releasing her from her commitment, which after several more months of discussion, I did relent to her request! I was now a Man, and Dom without a steady slave, which was what I dearly wanted. I was even more upset when a few months after her release I met her again at a D/s Club, where she introduced me to her new Dom and lover. To my amazement, I noticed an engagement ring in her hand! I then realized that the woman had all along planned to snag me into marriage and that she only agreed to undergo training and collaring in an effort towards succeeding in this goal! Although I felt hurt, and as a fool for not seeing the direction I had been led in, I felt more pity for the man who professed his dominance, yet was also being led by this calculating little slut! Mental pain does have a way of making you stronger! For the next several years I found other women who wanted to explore their taste for submission, to which I am happy to say I wasted no time playing with! I reluctantly stopped attending the clubs and built a working dungeon in my home's basement, where I continued to enjoy the ladies who were happy to play. I invited old and new friends to my "lair" where I was lucky to have met many quality people of both Dominant and submissive traits. I became friends with some very Dominant Women as well, who owned both male and female slaves. As a Dom - I do enjoy dispensing pain to women during play. I find their tears, struggles, and markings from whips, paddles, and my canes extraordinary pleasurable! I am a sadist at heart which has from time to time caused me to lose a potential lifetime slave, this I have accepted! Painsluts are the most difficult to find, although they are out there! As a Sadistic Dom, I remain steadfast against brandings, cuttings, knifeplay, hangings, and most play resulting in blood! Life for a man engaged and this lifestyle can have its limitations, but if I had to do it all over again the rewards outnumber its faults! |
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Bianca15(switch female)
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6 years ago •
Mar 29, 2018
Okay, I have tried to ignore the post above mine for two days, and fair warning, I'm going to fail. This, in my mind, exemplifies rape culture. I do realize that you are from a different generation, and I think that I have cooled off enough that this post will hopefully not end up as inflammatory as it might have been otherwise.
It infuriates me to read that you, somehow, have made yourself the victim, because a woman decided that she wanted something different and asked to be free to pursue that. (And after "several more months" you decided that was acceptable.) By YOUR OWN WORDS, she didn't try to trap you into anything! She realized she wanted something that you didn't, and then asked to leave! That isn't, in any way, trapping you into something. Quite the opposite in fact. And, somehow, her total honesty with you, and a relationship that had nothing to do with you, earns her the name "calculating little slut". Nothing about this is okay. |
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Silver(sub female){not intere}
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6 years ago •
Mar 29, 2018
to be honest....i would rather be called a calculating little slut any day than to wake up some day down the road and realize that i am miserable and that the other person really does not want me anymore.
chemistry is chemistry and cant be created...its innate. if there was chemistry between the two of you she would have felt compelled to stay. her honesty should be applauded ...she walked away from you WITHOUT taking half of your assets and precious years of your life. maybe in this case the cup is half full |
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| Dumbledore(dom male) |
6 years ago •
Mar 29, 2018
"To my amazement, I noticed an engagement ring in her hand! I then realized that the woman had all along planned to snag me into marriage and that she only agreed to undergo training and collaring in an effort towards succeeding in this goal! "
Being in the fall of your years, perhaps you should take some more time to reflect on this. Nothing in what you write supports this particular conclusion of yours. In fact, that she decided not to end her involvement with BDSM, but found someone else, should point you in the exact opposite direction. Clearly she did not choose marriage over BDSM, she choose someone else over you. That is - obviously - painful, but it does not have to be calculating, or wrong at all. From what you write it seems that she was aware something wasn't correct for quite a while and that the both of you communicated about this at length. That doesn't sound calculating to me. That she after she broke up with you met someone else, doesn't sound calculating either. That she was lucky enough to find someone she not only wanted to be submissive to but also wanted to marry is not something that makes her bad. It's not something that makes you bad either. It's just life. |
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Silver(sub female){not intere}
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6 years ago •
Mar 29, 2018
love that phrase......It's just life! ...thank You for that!
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Silver(sub female){not intere}
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6 years ago •
Mar 29, 2018
love that phrase......It's just life! ...thank You for that!
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ric840147
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6 years ago •
Mar 29, 2018
"Sometimes life just sucks"
I guess that's a truth we have to live with regardless of how unfair it seems. |
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ric840147
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6 years ago •
Apr 8, 2018
Re: When The Submissive Does The Leaving: Handling Loss For Evangeline wrote: Dominants are strong and all powerful, right? Well at least WE all are here at THE CAGE! However, every so often we have to go through that very human experience, the breakup. If the submissive is the one who initiates the break, it can often mean a hit to the confidence of the dominant, who has put so much time and energy in to the ownership of the submissive. Dominants, how do you get over a D/s breakup? Is it a time when you turn to your peers? And has it affected how you feel about your abilities as a dominant?
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Asteria(neither female)
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6 years ago •
Apr 8, 2018
ric840147 wrote: "Sometimes life just sucks"
I guess that's a truth we have to live with regardless of how unfair it seems. Life sucks only sometimes. Much more often people suck (and not necessarily in a good way) and make things worse than they should be. Relationships are not easy, and if they don't work, pretty often it is not because life sucks, but because we make mistakes, have different expectations or needs. And life is just life 
ps. Sorry for off topic 
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