Sub in need

Taramafor​(sub male) • Jun 23, 2018

Being blunt. In the end you can only help yourself and each other. Though logical and unbiased advice along with other peoples viewpoints can help as well of course.

1: Does he ever hesitate with your happiness?
2: Do you struggle with the communication?
3: Could even introducing someone else you know to them "break the ice" between you two? Personally I did this today myself and it helped.

There's a lot of factors at play. But basically if he hesitates to make you happy in a specific area that's on him. Can be hard to bring up some topics because of that fear of not wanting to seem too selfish/needy but if you get down/depressed due to lack of attention or activity then speak your mind or suffer the consequences for remaining silent. In the end it will harm BOTH of you in the long run if the don't get a dose of blunt honesty along the lines of "I need more of this and you'll just feel bad later if you don't try sooner instead of later". Can be tricky to phrase that in a way that doesn't come across as "guilt trippy". But it is true in my experience.

Unfortunately the trick is in getting another to do the same back even when you know they care. And when they don't speak back so much that can really complicate things. But that too is on them and not you if that's the case. Provided you tried to be understanding yourself of course. Don't feel bad for having tried to make things work out.

I only skim read the thread so I don't have the full story. But hopefully this general advice helps. I've been through and observed more then my fair share of depression. Don't let it beat you. Be understanding and don't stand for excuses instead. Everyone has reasons to hesitate and be concerned though. Even angry.

My theory is your sub nature causes you to struggle with "leading by example" when it's needed. Know this. Even a sub must take charge if another struggles and lacks direction. Even with owners.

slavepsyche​(sub female) • Jun 23, 2018

It's awesome to see how caring and concerned this community is with its members. It's such a beautiful thing.

I definitely know the feeling of being lonely and stressed, especially when your Dom is away and you can't communicate as consistently. It can totally feel like a part of you is lost. I just try to keep mine in my mind in all things that I do. I try to keep myself busy and productive, doing things around the house, reading and learning, practicing things that he likes for me to do. That way he is always with me on the inside and I feel secure in that.

Feel free to reach out to me anytime.

Kateintraining​(sub female){Gratefully} • Jun 23, 2018

Im feeling a lot better today. Big sleeps helped. Just to clarify..... communication with Sir was not the issue. He chatted with me for a long time late last night. He was very concerned for my wellbeing and gave me the reassurances i needed. I have zero problem with our ds relationship. He just wasnt available when i needed him yesterday.

Sometimes you just have a bad day.
I am very grateful to those who reached out. Your words helped me through a tough episode.
This weekend will be packed self care and reflection.

Come what may

WhiteRoses​(sub female) • Jun 23, 2018

Good morning. I am glad to hear you are doing better. I so understand the bad days. Sometimes it is just overwhelming. Offer still stands, I am an email or IM away.

We all have our own issues we battle, you have support here to help brace you up when needed.

Wycked_lil_witch​(dom female) • Jun 23, 2018

Oh gee, all this rainbows and unicorn farts please. Strong one, well show it. First thing remember who, and who's you are. Respect that, if nothing else respect that. And if you don't know or are uncertain well... ok, now look, do you have Welcome written on your chest? i DIDN'T THINK SO though maybe you should, anyways just trying to help. Never give into the quicksand.

1stdragonfly​(sub female) • Jun 24, 2018

Whether I'm having a great day or a miserable day, the fact remains that it will pass. Tomorrow the sun will come up on a new day. You just have to get through this one...
Whatever it takes, one step at a time, nobody says you have to do this gracefully, you just have to do.
Reach out as you did, as you have many friends Among Us here. Sometimes all you need is someone to hear you.
Feel free to contact me at any time should you need to talk.
Tough times don't last but tough people do...
When things go wrong, don't go with them.
This too, shall pass.

Notely • Jun 25, 2018

Hope your well we are all here for you I am sure things will be fine.

Kateintraining​(sub female){Gratefully} • Jun 30, 2018

It's all good folks. Black dog gone away. Got new goals and things to look forward to. Subs in a happy place.
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