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Wired differently?

CK45​(sub female)
5 years ago • Oct 29, 2018
CK45​(sub female) • Oct 29, 2018
MasterBear,
Yes..I guess it does.
I found the topic interesting.
HisSecretSub​(sub female)
5 years ago • Oct 30, 2018
HisSecretSub​(sub female) • Oct 30, 2018
I've never owned a cat, my parents are allergic so they never had us around cats .... so I don't think that's my reasoning. hahahah icon_smile.gif But that is definitely an interesting article ....
Bunnie
5 years ago • Oct 30, 2018
Bunnie • Oct 30, 2018
@ CK45, great question icon_smile.gif
Yes, I believe we are wired differently. Why do I believe that? Have you ever tried explaining why you like the things you like to someone who doesn’t like those things? Impossible. I realised this quite early in my “coming out.” I was trying to share with my one person in the world who I know loves and accepts me for who I am no matter what... and she just could not understand. Not in a judgmental way... she just couldn’t wrap her head around any of it. In her mind it just didn’t make sense. It’s was a very valuable realisation for me, because I realised that we are different and that’s ok. It doesn’t mean we can’t still love each other unconditionally.
So... geez sidetracked lol... on my journey, I’ve focused around learning to love all the parts of myself I (and we all) have been told/taught to reject... like being needy. Hell yes I’m needy at times. Something I learned a very long time ago, is that we’re all carrying around the capacity for the same emotions... we just mix and match our own individual concoctions. However, given the right circumstances... we all have the potential to feel/behave in any way.
When it comes to “wiring,” I think it’s a mix of both. Because my siblings and I all grew up in the same environment, yet we’re not all kinky... so although environment can definitely be a contributing factor, I think nature also plays a role. I believe all of these factors combined together into our own concoction is what makes us “us.”
FabSeverus​(dom male)
5 years ago • Oct 30, 2018
FabSeverus​(dom male) • Oct 30, 2018
this is why so many subs choose the kitten into their username??
Never growned with cats around and I know a lots of cat owners who are far from bdsm kind of people, so I would say that article is purr
Allie Kat​(sub trans woman){DarkFox}
5 years ago • Oct 31, 2018
Have you read the book "Leading and supportive love."? I think it addresses this quite well.

The answer is yes, we are wired differently, however, perception (which is your issue) is simply based off the majority and exposure. The book really talks well about how D/s is seen and how it should be presented and approached in a Vanilla world.

I think that @MistressMapes said it best about how we are all wired differently icon_smile.gif
CrimsonPaw
5 years ago • Oct 31, 2018
CrimsonPaw • Oct 31, 2018
Wow that's an interesting article! I also was not around cats and I don't have kitty or kitten in my name so I think some of us must just be wired differently. *Wink*

I can relate to Bunnie about having a close friend who doesn't understand. I just told my closest friend last month and he hasn't talked to me since. Well, he'll text and ask if I'm still on this site, when I reply with yes, he disappears for awhile again. *sad*

However, I might be able to smooth things over with that article, show him it's the cats fault. *Wink*
EnforcedBliss​(dom male)
5 years ago • Oct 31, 2018
EnforcedBliss​(dom male) • Oct 31, 2018
Bunnie wrote:
@ CK45, great question icon_smile.gif
Yes, I believe we are wired differently... I believe all of these factors combined together into our own concoction is what makes us “us.”


I think the whole post is very well expressed and thought out. You are right about the impossibility of explaining an interest or inclination to someone who doesn't share it. The intensity of the impossibility seems to increase proportionate with how personal the inclination is. You like strawberry ice cream and they don't? No biggie. You like providing flawless service to a Master and they don't? Even though it effects them no more than your preference in ice-cream this one is a biggie. I've often wondered if it is insecurity, moralizing, envy or a slap at something in them that they aren't comfortable with.

Don't show people like that the article about cats though or they'll be extinct in a week.

Bliss
SevenSeven
5 years ago • Nov 1, 2018

Re: Wired differently?

SevenSeven • Nov 1, 2018
MissBonnie wrote:
CK45 wrote:

Do you think that people that are drawn to this lifestyle are just wired (physiological) differently??


there was a report a few years ago published in the Journal of Evolutionary Psychology that revealed / suggests the reason we are all into BDSM, is due to kitty litter trays and cat poop. (I'm not joking) The reason is that a common brain parasite from cats, Toxoplasma gondii, which causes toxoplasmosis, is linked to sexual arousal by fear, violence and danger in humans.

I've never found any more further studies or other supporting documents (if you do, could you contact me) but it does add an interesting twist to this topic.
If this is the case the question then becomes, do you take a pill or not or just get more cats?

https://www.independent.co.uk/life-style/love-sex/bondage-cat-reason-sadomachism-sex-toxoplasma-brain-parasite-a7447681.html


That’s interesting. Did you see the conclusion at the end of the paper? I thought this part was cool. It’ll definitely make you think.

“The infected subjects expressed a lower tendency toward sexual dominance, tattoo and piercing, watching pornography, group sex, and they are less often engaged in activities that include Bondage, Discipline and Sado-Maso- chism (BDSM). However, they expressed higher attraction to bondage, violence, zoophilia, fetishism, and, in men, also to masochism, and raping and being raped. Generally, infected subjects expressed higher attraction to nonconventional sexual practices, especially the BDSM-related practices, but they also reported to perform such activities less often than the Toxo- plasma-free subjects.”
LordofPain56
5 years ago • Nov 1, 2018
LordofPain56 • Nov 1, 2018
There is no question that we are all wired differently. At birth, God hands out a variety of character traits to each person, many differing from one person to the next. Some folks think of this as a spice of life. When I was a kid, I realized that I had magnificent mechanical abilities, a great eye for detail, concienciousness and perseverance to succeed. I used those traits to build and create things, assuming everybody else had those abilities also. But when I went into the work world at age 16, I was shocked to find that some people were mechanically "brain-dead", dis-organized, aloof and happy-go-lucky.
But I think God has a purpose in all this. Regardless of the different gifts we were given, we can still accomplish great things by working together.
I always believed that the sexual proclivities we were born with were also handed out by God at birth. I never had any problem with the fact that I was born Dominant. If you can recall the story of Adam and Eve, God commanded Adam to dominate his woman from that time forward immediately after they were banished from the garden of Eden. Why God made me a sadist? Maybe there is a masochist female out there somewhere looking for me.
And I agree that mental and physical abuse regardless of vanilla or alternative relationships is wrong.