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Thoughts and feelings of the moment or revelations I have had and want to share with others that I hope may be useful to perhaps maybe at least one other person in making their day, or at least making them smile or connect a missing dot somewhere
2 weeks ago. Feb 7, 2020, 3:18 AM

*proceed with caution, delicate subject not all may agree and lots will say breech hard limits*

So the contents of this post will contain children, however none in a sexual way and none with any adults. The context in which they are used is only due to the situation that recently was observed and brought around. They were not harmed, coached, taught or helped along in anything they did. Their parents were well aware of everything happening and not against any of it. To protect them all names are changed and will not be given out. If you have anything negative to say please keep it respectful otherwise I will delete your comment. You can feel free to leave this blog at any time if you feel uncomfortable reading this.

So my older sister was recently visiting us at home and she brought her grandson who is 6, we shall call him Snow. He is a very energetic happy boy who is very curious about the world.

We also babysit my younger sisters son who is 3 who we shall call Ice. Ice already has shown traits that lean toward puppy play. Things such as chewing on puppy toys, barking, howling, crawling on the floor and wanting to play fetch all the time with balls.

What I find interesting is that Snow picked up one of Ice's dinosaurs and asked if he wanted it, then told him to sit. After he did Snow gave him the toy and told him he was a good boy, rubbed his head and Ice was very happy wiggling in delight. Pretty sure that if Ice had a tail, it would have been wagging in joy and delight. Then Snow told him to stay, held his hand up in classic stay position and backed away saying stay repeatedly as he backed away but Ice jumped up and followed giggling. Snow walked Ice back over and took Ice back to the spot telling him to sit again. This "play scene" if you will, continued on for about 20 minutes with both boys laughing and generally having a great time and in the end sat on the couch together playing video games chatting about the dynamics of how the game worked and why.

What I am wondering here is since neither of them have ever been exposed to kink or BDSM before, is that is the relationship of pup and handler just a part of what make you who you are? Or is it something that you learn from others as you are growing up from spending time around others (I.E. adults training real dogs, dogs playing with toys when you are an infant crawling on the floor, and an adult throws toys then you start playing fetch with them and find out how much fun it is and play, then that nature continues as you get older? That because of the accepting nature of the environment you are raised in, no one disputes your behavior but rather encourages it because it is making you happy? Or is this a learned thing that as you grow up you see others interacting in a certain way and how it makes them feel and decide that is how you should behave to feel the same way in order to fit in? If this is so then does it mean that trauma can play a role in brain chemistry and make up turning you into the person you end up becoming when you reach adulthood?

I just find it interesting because Snow called Ice boy and petted him on his head and Ice got happy and ran to him every chance he got super happy and wiggly happy to see him just as you expect a puppy would to see its owner. Ice escorted Snow to the couch, waited for him to get on the couch, then ran to get him his TV remote (a play one) then after he gave him the remote happily, Snow patted the couch and Ice hopped up to sit next to him happily to watch cartoons together.


3 weeks ago. Feb 6, 2020, 6:30 AM

So after one of the worst, most stressful days we have had in a very long time, and managing to make it all the way through it without ripping my own hair out, or other such insane behaviors, I found this website and thought it would be perfect to share here. It is a gay fetish photography one that has amazing pictures on it that some here might find enjoyable. If not then meh oh well move on nothing lost other than a few minutes time. If so awesome got to see some great art pictures of sweet BDSM art that was pretty hot and gave some great ideas

Hope some of you shall enjoy the art and pictures at least and maybe get ideas to either share or try out yourselves.


3 weeks ago. Feb 3, 2020, 12:44 AM

Everyone is focused on Super Bowl Sunday, but of course the most important thing to me was the Puppy Bowl!!!! That is what I look forward too every year it is WAY cuter, funner and awesome with 10 times more benefits for everyone that turns out positive for all the players!! Go Team Ruff and Team Fluff!!!! Love you all your are SUPER cute!!!!

3 weeks ago. Feb 1, 2020, 6:41 PM

So I read this super interesting article related to the science of sex and genders and how it works. It was really fascinating honestly to learn all of it from a scientific point of view and see how it all changes with slight hormonal shifts and deviations to the balance. I will post the link for those interested in checking it out, however there was a part of it I really wanted to put on here that I feel is super important and that should never be forgotten.

"Before you discriminate against someone on the basis of 'biological sex' & identity, ask yourself: have you seen YOUR chromosomes? Do you know the genes of the people you love? The hormones of the people you work with? The state of their cells? Since the answer will be obviously no, please be kind, respect people's right to tell you who they are, and remember that you dont have all the answers. Again: biology is complicated. Kindness and respect dont have to be." Quoted from the article I read not written myself.

This is a great quote and one to really think about before you attack someone for being male, female, non-binary, trans or anything else. You have not looked at their genes under a microscope and are not qualified to make snap judgements about who they are saying they are. If they look perfectly female yet say they are male, then believe them and refer to them as such. It costs nothing to be be kind and polite to people. However it costs everything and burns bridges and oppertunities when you are harsh, mean and rude to others that, maybe not now but later in the future, may come back to haunt you in ways you will never see coming as Karma is always watching and she is a bitch and never plays nice to those who are mean and nasty to others. Have compassion, understand others points of view, see where they are coming from and help where you can. If someone is being mean and offensive, rather than react and lash back the best revenge, is do nothing at all.

People want you to react to their outbursts and when you dont react and walk away you are winning overall as they get no reaction, no fight and you are not hurt because what is the point of listening to people who are mean, rude or nasty when they are obviously doing it for attention, or do not understand the context in which something was said and rather than become educated and deal with the issue civilly they react poorly and choose to attack others in order to feel better themselves. Do not be mean to them, feel bad they are uneducated and try to help them always. Education is the best defense and can help create peace.

Here is the link to the article I read for those interested in reading the science of how sex works on a chromosome level:

1 month ago. Jan 2, 2020, 12:15 AM

So I found this on another site and I believe that itrings completely true and it should be seen here as well so I am sharing it for those who would like to see it.


1 month ago. Jan 1, 2020, 7:04 PM

So I found this on another site and I believe that itrings completely true and it should be seen here as well so I am sharing it for those who would like to see it.


1 month ago. Dec 28, 2019, 6:54 PM

Warning! : This post may be harsh or offend those who are uber devoted to faith and religion. If you happen to be super devoted to your beliefs and POV's, I suggest you stop here, quit while you are not offended and leave before you become so. That being said, if you have negative comments to say then okay I will accept them, however if they become too intense or toxic I will delete them, so you have been warned ahead of time. That all being said on with my post to all those still interested in reading it.

We all know that the holiday seasons are often stressful for many people, but many of us have never stopped to ask the question of why? Sure because family, being busy, chores, getting things done before the holiday itself. It is my honest belief and opinion that God himself realized his epic mistake he had made by creating humans and giving us free will. Therefore he ignores us 95% of the time and eventually when he can no longer ignore the whining we do he comes down to solve everyone's problems all at one time.

This explains why "the snowball effect" happens. When one thing happens it seems to trigger a series of events that progressively gets worse and worse spreading rapidly and engulfs everything and everyone it touches. Because god figures "fix" everyone at once and shut them up so they leave him the hell alone so he can go back to golf or whatever it is he does in his own world of perfection and fluffy happiness while we suffer in misery. He doesnt care what happens to the fucked up science experiment gone wrong, only that it shuts up and leaves him alone.

Again I understand everyone has their own thoughts, opinions and views of the world in which of course I respect. I in no way want to force my views on anyone and totally respect everyone and their views. I was raised Christian my whole life by a Catholic father and Christian mother but never went to church. I used to like to read parts of the bible and do like certain parts of it purely for the story aspect not for the region part. It is my personal thought that since the bible was written thousands or years ago in a completely different dead language, the translators could have totally changed the context of the text and wording and no one would be the wiser for it.

Reasons for post sorry (not sorry):

1. Super stressed out to maximum

2. Three of main alters are down due to severe illness and hibernation

3. Sick for over 1.5 months (nothing docs can do for fungal meningitis attack, already on meds)

3 months ago. Nov 12, 2019, 6:04 PM

So this is a long assignment I learned about and thought I would share here for those who might be interested in learning the fascinating science behind what we do I hope you enjoy :D

--Disclaimer: I only did the research online, I did not go to school for any of this and if you want more information send me a message or bond and I can give you the link--


Endorphin Level Scale 

Level 1- no altered state of consciousness, increased pain threshold. Light stingy toys or paddles are still pretty painful

Level 2- no altered state of consciousness, noticeable leap in pain threshold

Level 3- resembles a mildly drugged state, droopy eyelids, more relaxed, moans and groans, lower inhibitions

Level 4- definite altered state of consciousness, appear as if drugged, will be very compliant and submissive, is still able to communicate, super sensitive to the smallest stimulation and reaction times are quick. Body is often limp due to the "high" of endorphins but when given stimulus AKA paddle, will jerk, leap and twitch with intense force along with deep long moans with little effort from the top

Sexual intercourse should only be done in levels 3 and 4 for safety reasons of the bottom and to ensure both partners, or all partners benefit from it and no one is taken advantage of and everyone ends up happy at the end of the session.

Level 5- Deep subspace, very unlikely to safeword even when they probably logically should the endorphins are so high they over ride normal safety measures, very groggy, supreme ectasy. docility, bottom can take just about anything the top can do to them, bottom is super relaxed and clearly in altered state of consciousness.

Typically this is where normal scenes/play sessions end as to push further it would require a deep intimate understanding and knowledge of the partner you are playing with.

Level 6- Will not safeword, will take anything the top does willingly, extremely submissive, almost completely non-verbal, wild thrashing at mild stimulation, primalistic behavior and very little if any speech.


After play is over aftercare for the bottom is critical for the bottom due to the endorphin and adrenaline levels crashing having being built up over a short period of time. Cuddling time provides contact top to bottom and provides intimate contact that helps the bottom completely focus their entire being on the top. They may not want massage, talk or anything beyond being cuddled and listened to as they babble or talk mindlessly as the chemicals rush through their system. The top's job when done right is to listen, focus solely on the bottom, remind them to relax every so often as the adrenaline will cause them to tense up every so often, drink water, nod to show they are listening to what the bottom is saying, and assure the bottom it is okay. The bottom often has a "falling off the edge of a cliff" feeling as the endorphins start ebbing down so the top's job is to remind the bottom to relax and ensure them it is normal and to enjoy the high state they are having from it and wonderful state of mind they are now experiencing.


3 months ago. Nov 12, 2019, 5:08 PM

So I recently went to a play party where I got to watch a really hot and intense scene where the top beat the sub with various tools like a paddle, various floggers, a red square plexiglass paddle on a bendable stick that left instant marks and caused everyone that got hit with it to instantly jump up and holler and you saw the immediate results from it and even a horse saddle cinch. It was super awesome and the guy was a power bottom who had a huge amount of endurance! However while watching this a guy on the sidelines was making comments that, being a very innocent curious puppy that I am, I just couldn't resist finding out more about. He kept making comments like "Oh that's level 3" or "droopy eye lids definitely level 3 now", so I asked him what he meant by that. He told me the endorphin pain scale. I had to find out more about this.

So after I came home and had sleep since it was 3 am, I was able to chat with my puppy trainer about it who is well aware of what I was talking about. He gave me homework on it and it is SUPER fascinating! I think a lot of people here might be interested in it and wanted to see if I posted it here people would like to see? It explains the different levels of subspace in a medical type way according to chemicals in the brain and body reactions during a scene! If so I can put it here to read and check out, so let me know what you guys think!



3 months ago. Nov 11, 2019, 6:55 PM

 After doing a lot of thinking and reflections, I have come to realize and understand that of course not everyone uses BDSM the same way and plays differently which is what makes our community so diverse and interesting. However with some people it is more a part time hobby, a thing they do sometimes to release stress and then go back to "the real world", where as to others its a 24/7 thing and going to parties is fun, but it is something they do all the time in daily life as well. There are a variety of reasons for this some of which could be related to trauma and PTSD, as many reasons as there are kinks lol so pick and choose the one that suits whatever style works best for your play type. That being said on a day like today when it could be seriously rough for some due to triggers and emotions, putting on a pup hood and pupping out to escape is the best coping skill to use.

I digress though, what got me thinking about this is that with types of play like pup play (which I am passionate about), is that they are not sexual but more like therapeutic. When severe stress happens and triggers are hit, it can cause a lot of problems for people in which they handle in different ways. I used to use martial arts as a way to channel this and it worked out well, I got to teach kids how to punch, kick, obey commands, behave and follow rules as well as correctly channel their frustration and anger into a healthy way. Once I got out of the military however I didnt have that chance and while yes I had BDSM I also didn't have a good focal point to safely release things like triggers. Once I found pup play though it was like waking up after a very long sleep. It opened my eyes to a whole new world I never knew was out there! I could let go of everything, ignore the "real world" and just fun around on all fours barking, chasing balls, wagging my tail and being petted while told I was a good girl/boy. I was in absolute heaven!

After I came out of pup space the first time and researched more into it. I realized I had been a pup my whole life and didnt know it. I had done all kinds of normal pup stuff even as a child! Slept in dog crates, ate dog treats, chewed on dog toys and rough housed with the dogs, chased squirrels and small rodents, dug holes in the yard and generally caused mayhem and havoc everywhere all the time just as a puppy does. I did more reading deeper into pup play and everything about it and the roles, packs, training, handling anything I could along with the leather community. I hooked up with pup groups and made tons of friends and met my Alpha, beta, gamma, omega and Trainer there.

Pup play is therapy for me, a way to escape in a healthy way. Instead of drugs and alcohol I use pup play to escape, I am not sure if this is a bad thing or not but it works for me. I keep my puppy side mostly hidden, (I cant help random barking at squirrels), even my totally vanilla family has told me they could see the difference in me since I started doing it (they didnt know about the pup play until 8 months ago), but they said I seemed a lot happier and for all intents and purposes healthier.

Therefore I believe that kink is a way to increase your mental health and enrich your life to live to the fullest especially on your roughest days.