Among the many things over the years that have driven me crazy, few are as obnoxious as dominants who assume their domliness hinges on how much humiliation they can dole out.
I'm not entirely sure where it went off the rails, maybe it was bad porn, but somewhere along the way the idea that humiliation is a fetish and not everyone has a like for that fetish (on either side of the slash) got tossed out the window and now every dominant looking to prove their domliness barks out a sneering order, ending it with some kind of insult.
When you message someone and act like that without getting to know their likes and dislikes you are assuming they are into that fetish. If you wouldn't assume they're into anal, needle play, blood play, scat, etc. then why would assume they have a fetish for humiliation?
Not all submissives are into humiliation. Not all dominants are into humiliation. Being a submissive who does not like being called names or insulted does not make you any less of a submissive. It just means you don't get your engine going with those kinds of actions. And that's okay.
And being a dominant who doesn't like to name call or be rude to their s-type doesn't make you a lesser dominant, either. It's just like not enjoying topping needle play or water sports. All things aren't for everyone.
On one hand I feel like I shouldn't go tilting at this particular windmill because it is an easy way to identify who the fucknuts are, but on the other hand I hate seeing some eager, excited new submissive get ruined because they just can't handle the name calling and think that's what they have to put up with.
So maybe knock it off? If you're approaching someone for the first time, don't assume they want to be called a whore or pig or worm. Or s-types, don't assume you need to do the verbal version of crawling on the floor. Get to know someone before you start whipping out the "Daddy's little whore cum and piss dumpster" shit at them, eh?
