This is a two part blog which will break what some people think they can do and not to do , and how people see us from the out side . This is important that new Dominants and submissives know what they can do ,and Thier rights as a dynamic .
People on the outside looking in any Dynamic, relationship, lifestyle or situation only see what's on the surface , in this case a strong dominant standing over a kneeling naked submissive, he's in charge , he's powerful , she's weak, as is with most things , that is vein doesn't consider emotions , feelings, conversation, negotiation and inner voice that guides all of us .
Dominance and submission is a constant push and pull between two willing partners , one leads the other follows , one commands the other consents. the needs of each each is different to take control to be controlled , are equal even though each partner is on different ends if the spectrum.
The misconceptions surround D/s are many
• Dominants take what ever they want
• submissives should never ask for what they want they're not real subs if they do
• find shouldn't ask a sub opinions or desires makes them look weak .
• laughter, teasing, and silliness have no place in D/s let's serious business .
All lies Doms and subs are first and foremost people in a relationship and find it fulfilling in order, for it to be successful and last any length of time .
• Doms don't "take " anything without mutual agreement, consent and prior negotiation, they need a subs permission first. • Subs do as they are told and asked after ground rules have been set and consent gained.
• Both Doms and subs should also have freedom to express Thier wants , needs and desires when ever they want
• Laughing, teasing and silliness need to have a place in every relationship
D/s is give and take power dynamic each side feeds if the other.
Subs : power, control, and trust
Without cooperation and willingness to submit, there is no D/she may be a Dom but not dominating anyone unless he has a willing submissive. But the act of dominance from BDSM standpoint can't happen (legally) with out consentung and willing submissive. The freedom as a sub , is knowing you can trust your partner enough in order to let go completely and follow the rules , guidance, commands and directions they are given . A Dom needs to know they can trust Thier subs to follow all rules , protocols and do as thier told.