3 months ago. September 3, 2022 at 10:14 AM
I have been mostly single since 2006... You can count how many years. On and off there have been some relationships I had here and there, but they all lasted for just a short while. I think this happened mostly because I am a highly self-content person. I never really feel lonely when I have been alone for almost 20 years.. And I think it's also because I never wanted to settle for less.. I deserve better, and most importantly, live a life I will remember.. But somehow, I know some essences has been missing in my life and I will need to find this very piece of puzzle to make my life a whole.
This is probably something beyond what we mostly discussed here on thecage. I have said that I want something deeper, the extent to which it could become a journey I can spend with my Dom for the rest our lives. As a newbie, I am trying to figure out what have been discussed mostly here: possessed, used, taken, owned. I think all these could easily be said than done.
To my understanding, the body is something to be possessed, used and taken by the mind, you are who you are and you do what your mind ask you to do. Hence my shallow understanding of a D/S relationship could probably be described as a mind body harmony. It is all about your own mind/body coherence, and the uniformity of you and your Dom.
However, after just a few days on thecage, I could already tell some Ds are just a mind player. The way they use is just to play a game, a sex game to fulfil their desire, definitely not what they have described on their profile. They work mostly through simple mind manipulation: "Who are you serving?", "Who is your Dom?", "Who owns you?", these are all the typical questions they would ask you again and again in some of the "scenes" they created for you.
I obviously wouldn't settle just for this. I want someone understands my inner fire and could transform it to be a lubricant or reinforcement of our relationship. Someone could take time to really understand who I am, what I want, where I am heading to, and most importantly, understands why I crave for a BDSM life style.
I am not asking everyone to do this, cause obviously this is a long-shot that most people wouldn't or not willing to pursue. It is just for ME, and the Dom that I have not yet found. And it's cause I do want to live a life I will remember..not just a game, but a life, a real life, a meaningful life...