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Poppa's Problems and stuff!

Random thoughts or rants or something else. An infrequent look into what's going on in my mind and life. Possibility of Rants and assorted bullshit.
1 year ago. August 27, 2023 at 5:55 PM

Well like the title says , it's been a while since my last post here. And to be honest nothing much has changed, while things have been changing for me. 

Now I know that last statement seems contradictory, but I will try to explain it. In my life nothing much has changed. I'm still plodding along, trying to figure out what's what in the Lifestyle, and learning things every day. 

As for the second part, things changing for me, well, new experiences, new feelings, some old problems coming into play, and the jot of having my first sub. I never thought that I would actually have a sub of my own. He is a great fellow, kind, thoughtful, willing and fun too. It's very much early days and we are still finding out about each other, but I am hopeful that we will progress further. That's the last part of my changes dealt with.

As for the new experiences and the new feelings, I have had opportunity to explore my submissive side and my sexuality. Now for all of my adult life I have seen myself as a straight male! But in recent years in particular, I have been questioning myself about that.  I have become more bi curious of late. And a few weeks ago I was allowed the opportunity to explore that to an extent. Now it might not seem much but I have had my first proper tongues and all kiss with a man. And I really liked it!  Things progressed and I gave him a blowjob.... Yes... I sucked a dick for the first time and I don't think it will be the last! Before this, I had sort of submitted to the chaps wife by giving her a foot and leg massage as she requested from me. I am not a foot fetishist.... or at least I don't think I am! I thoroughly loved the experience and I will happily admit that I was rather turned on by the end! It's been a long time since any lady has left me so blooming horny! Anyway, back to the new experiences! After the massage had ended Maa'am asked if I would like a small neck massage in return. I readily agreed and turned my back to her whereupon she started to work on the knots in my neck. As I relaxed into the massage, I felt her nails starting to dig in a bit. Nothing serious as Ma'am has longish but sharp nails. I lowered my head and then she dragged her nails down my back and up again. I am no lover of recieving pain, but after the initial shock of the nails scraping down my shoulder blades, I found myself taken into a realm of pleasure. She carried on by making serpentine marks too and then had me face her and her husband. I did as I was told and looked at them both. I cannot describe the feeling I had. I think it may have been a mix of gratitude, relief, pleasure, love, all rolled into one. I was asked how I felt and couldn't answer. I was dumbstruck. I raised my head once more and thanked them both. Ma'am reached out to my chest and again ran her nails down me twice. And it was finished by her name being etched on my stomach. I sat back on my heels and looked at them both once again. All I could do was say Thank You to them both for allowing me to have that experience. I was amotional to say the least, and even now recounting the event, I feel emotional to say the least. 

And now for the last part... Old problems coming into play. This is a tough one to put into words especially on a public place like this. It is something I am open about to any potential partners and unfortunately it seems to scare them off. So here we go! I have ED problems and have done for 25 years roughly. That part I can live with.... finding a partner who can accept that is another story. My real problem came about 25 years ago when I was with a girl and we were having for me the best sex of my life! But as I was approaching orgasm, apparently something happened me. To this day I remember nothing of this, but this is what I was told. My demeanour changed and I looked like I was ready to seriously hurt this girl. I had gripped her wrists and was thrusting into her like a wild animal (her words not mine) and was snarling too like a dog.All I remember was her slapping my face and asking if I was ok. I said I was fine as I had just had the best fuck of my life! Why?? And then she told me what happened. I had blacked/blanked out and that was her reason for slapping me into sensibility. Needless to say the relationship didn't last too long after that. Every time I have been with a woman since then, as soon as I feel myself ready to cum, I have a panic attack. It scares the shit out of me pure and simple. I have been married since then and had the same troubles. But was still able to father a son. However about 3 years after he was born I was trying to start to make love to my wife with som light foreplay, when she told me to stop, I was not capable anymore and I should stop trying. And that was the last time I attempted to have penetrative sex. Some 18 years ago. I have had 2 or 3 girlfriends since my wife kicked me out but I have not been able to have sex with them. Foreplay is great but there is nothing more because I get scared. And this is where the final part comes in... old problems resurfacing. Now after giving my fella his blowjob, he wanted to reciprocate by playing with me. He took my cock out of my shorts and took hold and started to stroke me. I had to stop him. The fear and panic kicked in again. And I ended up crying beside him, feeling worthless and useless. Now this fella is someone I know and respect and have been lucky enough to have been accepted by him and his wife as a friend. I was relaxed and looking forward to whatever might happen. But in the end all I was left with was feeling guilty and pathetic. He has reassured me that nothing wrong happened and that we can try again and again and again if need be.My heart is racing now thinking about that night. 

But I am determined to find some kind of resolution to this problem. Whether it is a medical  thing by taking pills or a psychological thing where therapy will be the route to take then I will try it. At the age of 57 I am NOT done with sex just yet. 

1 year ago. March 22, 2023 at 1:05 PM

Well the postie arrived today and brought me some goodies! Ok so they're not the most expensive toys in the world but when you have no cash you make do with what you can get. Now if I could only get someone to practice with or at least try them out on! 

 

1 year ago. March 14, 2023 at 7:46 PM

I don't define as anything currently. The best term to suit me is STUDENT I am learning. I am being guided by others and learning from them and my own mistakes. My language online in particular seems to rub people up the wrong way. Too stiff, too formal. When I attempt to make light of something it is taken out of context!. I make fun of MYSELF and some people take umbridge. I am not for changing! Yes I know I should talk with more Doms to see how things work. But you see I have only been fully active for the last 6 weeks at best! I have attended ONE Munch! I am slowly finding my way around.

I am hoping to attend a class for new Dominants at the start of April. I say hoping because it is something I can ill afford but am willing to pay out to LEARN how to be better. I have been blessed and humbled in the fact that one Mistress has taken me under her wing and is offering me some unofficial help. And I will be eternally grateful for that. She is showing me that there is so much more to this lifestyle. Her subs are helping me too by telling me ways to do certain things and guiding me along. These are very experienced people I am with and every day is a school day.

Every day I doubt myself and wonder if I should carry on. And every day I am told that I am doing good and getting there slowly. I have told a few people this and I might have even put it online here, but I'll say it again. I discovered this lifestyle online about 25 years ago. Since then I have had to hide my desire to explore more. I didn't get a chance until 2 months ago when I started coming on here more often. I discovered the @LincolnBoudoir and paid a visit. I didn't know what to expect. But I was welcomed like I belonged there. I was home. Anyone that asked me I told them that I am a newbie! I haven't a clue as to what I was doing there. Ms. Maree Asked if I wanted to watch her at work! I declined that time but may very well accept in future if asked! Madame Moon was there too and we hit it off and she invited me to visit her private dungeon. Remember I am a total newbie to all this! I have been there a few times and conducted my first Dom session under Her supervision.

I have had ZERO experience before all this and up to now I have had 2 sessions. I know full well I am not experienced and that I have much to learn. I have no proper toys and am not in a position to buy the biggest and best. I rely as in the rest of my life on the kindness and generosity of others to help me along my way.

On a personal note I am in poverty. Simple. I get my benefit money a the start of each month. That goes on my rent, gas and electricity. I am left with no money for food. I get my shopping from Foodbanks. I have been asking friends to help me with money so I can travel to Lincoln to spend tine in the Boudoir and with Madame Moon and to make contacts. I am NOT saying this for anyone to feel sorry for me. It is just the way my life is. On Xmas Day I was about to commit suicide things felt so bad. I was ALONE in all ways. Now I think I have a family. Or up to a few hours ago I did. Now I'm not so sure.

If I seem standoffish online, that is not me. The written word can be easily misinterpreted. If in future I offend or say something out of place then tell me in private! I'll say it again... I am new to this lifestyle! I am LEARNING! Instead of berating, educate!

1 year ago. March 14, 2023 at 7:43 PM

This is a question I was asked a few weeks ago by a beautiful Mistress. I gave an answer, but as the day progressed I found myself questioning myself. My answer in the first instance was that I am a Top and Straight. Job done........ so you may think, but no. and this as been running through my mind ever since. Who am I? What would I like to be called? Simple questions but as I am discovering, the answers carry a lot of meaning. So I shall attempt to answer these questions now.

What am I?
Well I identify as being a Top. I am to all intents and purposes a straight heterosexual male. BUT..... I do have submissive desires. And some of those may bee seen as leaning towards being more gay(?) or to me being more bisexual. I want to have my prostate massaged and my cock milked. I want to be fucked with a strapon. I want my cock sucked as most horny males do but am open to a male/sissy/cd/tv doing that. And I am also open to anal sex with another man. But again I want to do this as a top! Is this contradictory? I have also discovered a sadistic streak in me, Whether that be inflicting physical pain or verbal humiliation and degradation, I want to explore this too. I am too much of a wimp to be any kind of a masochist although after being married twice some might say I am a masochist!

Who am I
Now by this I mean how do I like to be known in play or in a scene. This is difficult for me. I have gone by a few names in my adult life online as I'm sure a few who will read this have. Here I use the name Garion66. But when asked yesterday what I wanted to be called in a scene if needed I was at a loss. Those in the vanilla world call me by my given name or some variation thereof. But here and online in general I have used the names Garion, Belgarion, Poppabelgarion, Poppa, PoppaG and Pops. I personally like being called Poppa or Pops as it suits my fatherly side. But in any scene I think I might have to vary the name to suit the play. In my mind and according to the books I get my name from Garion is a youth full of energy and wanting to know and learn stuff sometimes reluctantly. Belgarion is the same person but older and wiser, In my mind he is a more serene and nurturing character. I added Poppa into the mix when I became a father again for the 3rd time and that has stock in some form for the last 20 years. And now I am living alone again and finding my way in this Kink world, I have no name that truly fits me and who I am. I am a father, grandfather, single, outgoing introvert, explorer, student, horny, needy, impatient alone, lonely and scared!

So if anyone can tell me after all that What I Am or Who I am then I will listen.

1 year ago. March 13, 2023 at 1:43 PM

As the title says.... Can I speak?

A strange thing to ask but recently I have had trouble expressing myself properly. Any one can ask me a question or my opinion on something, but when I answer or voice my opinion they don't like it! I make a joke comment and it's like I have murdered someone! I have been told that I am disrespectful to a Mistress who I respect fully! I know that if She was offended by my comment then She would have let me know bloody quickly! 

 

Now... full disclosure time. I am a newbie to the lifestyle! I know I have much to learn. I know that I need to get out there and meet with other Dominants and submissives to gain a little knowledge from them in how to act and behave. And slowly but surely I will get there. 

 

All I ask is a chance to explore this opportunity I have been given. I ask that Others, where ever they may be, or whatever their orientation is, or what side of the slash they are, to please be patient and non judgemental and to HELP and EDUCATE us newbies as we stumble and fumble our way through. I count myself lucky to have been taken on by a wonderful Lifestyle Mistress. In the short time I have been meeting with Her and been talking with Her I have learned so much. And in future as I get to Munches, Meets and Events, I hope to be able to be allowed the opportunity to speak and ask questions to those who know so much more than me, and without judgement or fear of ridicule