Dumpless Flights.

I was reading a recent interview about a YouTuber I watch… 

She was asked about one of her greatest fears in the kink realm and something about it really resonated with me. 

Her fear was to give too much of herself that she looses all meaning. 

Being honest, at first, I didn’t understand what she meant. I mean being submissive, that’s almost our job right? To give and be molded into something usable? To be reconstructed time again maybe with some funishments along the way… 

But then I really thought about it. And I thought about the past, as well as the present too; and I thought about how I had allowed myself to be molded and locked to the cuffs of destruction. I allowed a silent chain to be bounded around my neck, dragging me to my next emotion/ my next feeling. And I liked it. It was exhilarating. To play this game of cat and mouse, getting the gift of attention in return. 

I can’t help but think; what was I doing? What was this lie that I was feeding about myself, to myself? Why was I constantly running and throwing myself into shark infested waters? 

Was it shame? Was it insecurity? What exactly was I missing from my life that forced me to throw myself at others, but still toy back… teasing my way into a corner just to be left with dust. 

But like all things grayed, color and vibration bled into me again. I was stuck in turbulence becoming accustomed to debris and clouded judgement because I, allowed my judgment to be clouded. 
I allowed my confidence and thoughts to be choked, because I liked to be choked. I liked broken but not any more. 

Even now, as I stretch for my next scene, looking at all the new possibilities, I leave that door closed and another open. Welcoming future and fun, hopefully with hot wax along the way… 

Nice to see you again! 
Bunny 🐰 

I’ve never been great at saying what I want…

Personally, I blame the neuro-spiciness but also, it’s because I suck at actually knowing what I want or what I want to do.

I can never make decisions for myself, and for fucks sake am I indecisive.

In fact, I would probably drive most of you poor doms crazy from my wild and rando personality.

What I’m saying is, I’ve always been told to    “-use my words-“: and words are hard for me in any given situation. Just because I want something doesn’t necessarily mean I am always capable of asking for it, or even really wanting it for that matter (Exhibit A of the Indecision).

Sex and kink included; I have always been drawn to the super “do now, ask questions later-“ type. I’ll even be man enough to admit that it’s gotten me in trouble more times than not, but to not have to rely on the whole egging and begging and pleading deal~ thats an ultimate fantasy of mine.

To come home from a long 12 hour shift of codes, and getting thrown up on- to a nice hot shower and frilly Lingerie laid out on the bed with his favorite perfume… a glass of wine, and a note with what he wants for dinner tonight….

I’d serve it to him and kneel, head on his lap as he praises me for working so hard and doing so right by dinner; hell, maybe a treat would even be in order ;)

Funny, I think I just used my words there~

XOXO

BUN🐰🩷

What I love so much about thunderstorms is the dramatic uncertainty. 

Black swirling clouds, Cool winds- and the smell of electricity fills you from tip to well, tail (hehe 😉 )

Whenever I am in sub space, recently, it’s like being engulfed in a thunderstorm. 

It’s like laying in a wheat field as you’re being pelted with rain- frigid and chilling; exhilarating and still addicting all the same.

It’s isolation, but with warm electricity coursing through your veins- 

It’s belts of black clouds, booming loudly until the warm sun peaks her head out, ready for the cycle to begin itself all over again. 

(Yeah Yeah; big hype for something so mundane~ don’t worry y’all; there’s more storms on the horizon <3) 

xoxo

Bunny

Holy fuck. 

It’s been forever. I missed talking to you crazy people (hopefully) as much as you’ve missed talking to me. 

And god let me tell you, too much shit has happened in a two month span. And goddamnit, AM I TIRED. 
However, I have had some great (and not so great-) adventures but right now? I am ready to start over. 

BUT THAT’S ENOUGH YELLING FOR NOW- 

But I do have some very interesting stories for the future ….

xoxo

bun 

** DISCLAIMER**

This post is not meant as an end all or be all. It is pretty intense as recently; I was told that as a woman, I don’t understand what it means to submit- and that I should move on from the ( and I quote) “-dream that [I] have going on in [my] head.”

So I collected those feelings, and expressed them in the only way I know how… by writing them down.
I want to start a conversation about submission and domination, I want to understand all sides of the perspective being, it is a spectrum afteralll…

I believe in balance, I believe in duality, I believe in the union of the masculine and feminine: but also the masculinity and femininity we all contain within ourselves… that fine line of Yin and Yang… 

With that being said, I will shut my mouth and let your eyes wander… 

Sex.

I never stuck around in this community for the sexual gratification.

Power exchange to me, hasn’t been some sort of sexual secret. I don’t get a rush out of listening to you in my dms going on about how you like to make girls wet with just a glance.

I am more than that.

I am more than some wimpy fuck with a hot topic bondage kit.

I am more than some insecure fuck who uses women because he doesn’t want to be alone.

I am more than some  loser with a god complex because they’ve lived their entire life trying to prove to themselves, them selves.

I’ve never been afraid to be who I am.

I have always been unapologetically loud.

I have always been a little rough around the edges.

I don’t need you here to smooth me out.

I have allowed you in my space to polish what is already there.

That was a lot of yelling.

But what is submission to me? What is serving to me?

Duality.

Partnership.

A blend of masculinity and femininity.

Respect.

Dignity.

Power exchange is the ultimate surrender.

Regardless of what anyone says, you are breaking yourself down into little pieces, examining them, and putting them back together to not only serve your dom, but yourself.

You see me in my most vulnerable form.

I allow you to encompass and work parts of myself I have probably ignored. Neglected.

I am rebuilding my stones into a castle not just for the sake of pleasing you, but for the sake of  strengthening myself.

Let that sink in.

My bunny tail is tingling, my whiskers are twitching, my foot is thumping…. 

Maybe it’s the most recent trail of events, or there’s an old friend lurking in the horizon… 

BUT. I can feel it. Naughtiness; rearing its mischievous little head ‘round the corner. 

And boy, is it arousing… electrifying…titillating? 
(I’ve never quite liked that word. But it will have to do.) 

Regardless, Bun is excited. She’s come out of her borrow, taking in the daisy’s and Daffodils. Maybe chasing after a butterfly or two~ 

Who know’s, 

she might even spot the big bad wolf on her way… 

How Exciting 🐰

Maybe it’s because I like to feel small…. 

I’m a pretty big girl. Not overweight, but I am tall and I am curvy. 

Not something many would associate with the rambunctious attitude I seem to have. 

But there’s a little mystery I like that forms when I’m meeting with new people. 

I come off as quiet, sometimes timid… other times stand-offish but nothing serious. I like to analyze…. Fantasize maybe. 

It starts silly, favorite color… number…. If you won 500,000 dollars right now what would you do… but when I start sliding in those one liners: 

“what do you feel when you tie someone,…”

“Oh cool you like to hunt? How would it feel to hunt me… to watch me bounce along, antagonizing you… what would it feel like to see me captured with a wicked smile on my face….” 

dangerous game I know- but the change is electric. Mr.Fancy all suit and tie; calm, cool, collected… most of the time it’s a facade…..

But when bunny gets curious, and she tiptoes over a trap line, it’s nice to see them salivating. 

The Big Bad Wolf ain’t all that scary sometimes🐰

A door between us
never closed all the way—
just leaned into silence,
waiting.

Once loud,
now speaks in pauses,
in the way we choose
to listen
without needing to be right.

There is no map
for how people grow apart
But still find pieces
of themselves

I reach for you
not to reclaim what was,
but to understand
who I am

 I am not afraid of change.

This time,
I won’t lose myself. 

In a long while, 

I actually took the time to touch some grass and hike 3 miles. 

There’s a forest about 2 hours from here and being the impulsive bunny I am, I woke up at 11am; dug around for my Chacos (because what good of a hike would it be if I didn’t do it in my Chacos) and drove 2 hours to peace, quiet, and my absolute favorite: MUD 🤭💜

I decided to amp it up a notch and just follow where my heart told me. There’s about 10 different trails, 1 being the longest and easiest, 10 being the most rugged; I did 3: 

rocks 

gorges 

ladders 

and of course: MUUUUDDDD. 

It’s about last on the list of difficulty, and,

im sure:

YOURE PROBABLY WONDERING…. 
why in the hell does bunny love cold water and MUHD so much? 

what can I say, I’m a good girl who likes to get a little dirty 🤭🤭

and nothing says FUHN like cold feet and muddy thighs. 
but I don’t think I mentioned that close to the end of trail three, there’s a little secret shortcut that leads you to Sugar Creek (bonus points if you know where that is :3) 

which, I don’t know why they call it a creek because to me, it definitely looks like a river; but I guess Sugar River doesn’t have much of a good ring to it. 

In fact, Sugar Creek is where I took my most beautifully beautifying picture on my profile when I had a wild hair up my ass and decided to do trail five in the snow (probably not the best idea but hey, IM STILL ALIVE). 

But let me shut up and get to the good part, 

I cut through some brush and crawled my way down a ledge. There were some scary and ferocious geese but down worry, I handled my own. 

I sat on a big rock and slid everything off down to my undies and sports bra and ran like a manic into the “creek”. 

Don’t worry, it was freezing, and I squealed and giggled like a little girl, but it was the happiest I’ve been in a while. 
I talked about release a little while ago, and at first, I thought it was going to be at the hands of someone else; but this time, it was in my little frosty hands… and toes. 

and it felt absolutely AMAZING. 

School is finally taking a little break, and now I have time to focus on all the cutesy things and very pretty weather.

Well, as pretty as Midwest will let me enjoy. 
But, this week’s lesson is RELEASE. 

Releasing old energy by opening up the blinds, and cracking open them windows. 

Releasing old anger and grief that no longer serves me. 

Releasing cracks and pops from my brittle bones in Rope Class. 

AND RELEASING MY ZOOMIES ON AN UNSUSPECTING PREDATOR *Evil Laughter* 

anyways, what are you guys releasing this coming spring? 

~Bunny 🌼🌷🐰