Dumpless Flights.

I’ve had this weird melody on loop in my head for a few days now… 

only fitting at work I turn it into a song right? 
I will let you guess how it sounds :3 

"Lines in the Sand"

*(Verse 1)*

We said it’s casual, don’t read into it, babe

But every time you kiss me, I can’t look away

You pull me closer, then break the hold

Playing with fire, but it’s burning too cold

*(Pre-Chorus)*

We told ourselves we’d keep it light

But every touch is starting to rewrite

All the things we said we’d never do

Now I’m tangled up in loving you

*(Chorus)*

The lines in the sand are washing away

What was so simple now feels so gray

You’re not just a moment, you’re more than I planned

And now we’re caught in the mess of our own hands

The lines are blurred, I can’t pretend

That I don’t need you, that I don’t want this to end

We’re stuck in the middle of what’s right and wrong

But these lines are gone, and we’re holding on

*(Verse 2)*

We said no feelings, but this feels too real

You’re in my head, and I can’t even deal

One word, one look, and I’m already torn

I told myself I wouldn’t, but now I’m so worn

*(Pre-Chorus)*

We’re crossing every line we drew in the sand

Like we never even had a plan

*(Chorus)*

The lines in the sand are washing away

What was so simple now feels so gray

You’re not just a moment, you’re more than I planned

And now we’re caught in the mess of our own hands

The lines are blurred, I can’t pretend

That I don’t need you, I don’t want this to end

We’re stuck in the middle of what’s right and wrong

But these lines are gone, and we’re holding on

*(Bridge)*

I can’t keep pretending this is nothing at all

When every second with you makes me feel so small

You said we’d never let it get too deep

But now I’m drowning in everything we keep

*(Chorus)*

The lines in the sand are washing away

What was so simple now feels so gray

You’re not just a moment, you’re more than I planned

And now we’re caught in the mess of our own hands

The lines are blurred, I can’t pretend

That I don’t need you, I don’t want this to end

We’re stuck in the middle of what’s right and wrong

But these lines are gone, and I’m holding on

*(Outro)*

The lines in the sand, they don’t exist anymore

And I’m not sure if I want to keep the score

'Cause with you, I don’t know where I begin

And I don’t know where this ends, but I’m in.

is it corny? maybe… 

but it’s got this great pop country 90s feel and I’m loving it… almost like if the chicks and faith hill had a baby? 
there’s your hint !! 

*KISSIES* 

🐰 bunny 🐰 ~

Tomorrow is the big day.

I meet with the neuro surgeon to see if I need surgery or not.

Since doing this stuff alone, I don’t really know how exactly I feel yet so ive been furiously crocheting in the process. So far Ive made two blankets and one baby blanket.

It’s like hooking in your nerves, one by one but some how, in the end; it still turns out beautiful.

In fact, I got the call when I went out shopping.

I was getting some last minute Christmas gifts and right at the peak of some corny “let’s get drunk on Christmas” song I answered.

“Hey! We got your file! Cool case! Anyways come on in!! We’re gonna stick a needle in your brain and make sure it’s actually fluid thats leaking and not something else.”

Huh. Not exactly the gift I was looking for but I guess that’ll do.

I did end up making a great little friend on here. She’s shy so I won’t put her on the spot but, I already love her to pieces. I think she is  just the cutest. (You know who you are 😉 )

I don’t know y’all. Today has just been one of those weird days.

Not to mention, everytime I see flannel I get insanely sad. I’m sure you can guess why.

Toodles.

Bun

I have been thinking again, 

I know, scary beans. Bunny is generating thoughts; someone needs to stop her. 

But, these ones are teaching me lessons. 

I first started this blog because I was angry, and I was hurting, I was alone, afraid, yada yada yada…. 

However, I have always  loved writing. I am a very emotional and expressive person. One of the reasons why I love BDSM so much is because of these traits. 

I’m not patient, I take what I want when I want it, If I don’t like how something is done I say it, if I feel like I have been wronged I yell it out- how ever, I also struggle to see my own actions and because of this, I really struggle with guilt. 

This year, I was diagnosed autism and a brain malformation disorder. It has taken a lot of internal and external processing and I can certainly say, that still in this moment I feel weak.

I continuously feel these big and weird feelings day to day and a lot of times it is hard to process leading to grumpy bunny syndrome once again. 

Recently, I can say it has led to the loss of a relationship I thought I was going to have forever and one that was just blooming. 

The first I have been blocking out but the second, very hard to process. I wouldn’t say I am angry, in fact now that I have spoken, I don’t think I was in the beginning either. I think I was scared and hurt, but I digress…. 

Anyways, I’ve talked about it in therapy. I struggle with understanding empathy and emotions, actions, reactions, attachments… you know, the usual. 

It’s just, an adjustment I guess. 

But, I’m off to take a soak, my back is killing me :(

-bunny 

Remember when I said I had the best night ever? 
well scratch that shit, I forgot about the goddamned full moon. It was a fucking placebo. 

who knows a good chiropractor, 

or has good hands? 
fuckit, WHO IS BOTH. 

I don’t get paid enough for this shit. 
And I’m missing the one person who could fix this. 

sincerely, a very grumpy and very very stiff bunny. 

Hey y’all, 

I still have my zoomies so I just though I’d start a little conversation. 

I am finally back to working my normal shifts after completing one of the hardest semesters in school imaginable. 

It’s not that the content was hard, the universe is just an asshole and I, am hard headed. Yes, I can admit that I am a hard headed bun with a soft bottom; but I digress… 

anywho, I’m currently working a N12 (or Night 12 hours) and boy, it’s a shit show… b u t  I LOVE IT. 

Six patients, two isolations, one jumper, and three goofballs. I’m in absolute zoomie bunny heaven. 

anywhoooo 

I hope my silliness is contagious <3 

-bun 

Sometimes I get these random bursts of energy- 

I call them my zoomies. 

I get really excited and playful and all I want to do is bounce around and suck up all the attention I can gather. 

Or spankins. Spankins are nice too ;). 

Like yesterday, 

Although I am still alone right now, I zigzag from corner to corner wreaking imaginary havoc. 

However. I took out my zoomies on a spiced pound cake and HOMEMADE, none of that jar crap, chicken Alfredo. No garlic bread though. I didn’t have enough time to pick up a loaf from the bakery.

It was a bittersweet moment me thinks. 

Anyways. Just a small update from bunny <3

It’s weird. 

I woke up smiling today. 
And my head, it’s kind of clear; though- my ears are ringing. Not chimes and bells, just silent waves of sound moving in and out. Maybe it’s an ear infection. 

The moment I rolled over, here comes my kitty. I swore he was smiling at me. 
“Good mornin Mama! Are you Gettin up Now!” 

It’s just strange, 

maybe something good will happen today. 

The room is quiet now,

its walls thick with the weight of what has been done.

The air presses heavy, like the earth itself

has paused to listen.

Your hands tremble,

but no one reaches to steady them.

The words you've avoided for so long

hang in the stillness,

not as accusations,

but as truths too old to deny.

Time moves in circles,

slow and deliberate,

until it catches up with you—

not in a rush,

but in the certainty

of every step you took without thinking.

The silence speaks louder

than any outburst could,

and in its shadow,

you see the faces you've ignored,

the voices you've silenced,

the damage you've hidden behind excuses.

There is no escape,

no words to undo what has been broken,

only the cold, unyielding presence

of what must now be faced.

And in that moment,

you understand—

the only way forward

is through the weight

of your own reflection.
🌲

I swallow in silence,

It clings to me,

Every word I didn't say, but still; pieces lay. Disregarded.

It’s like trying to breathe through the broken glass: the Sharp edges in my chest.

And I scream but it won’t come.

I am swallowed whole by sound,

And I am tangled in the sharpest of things,

But they still latch on, like parasites.

It’s suffocating;

I held you in the silence: stuck beneath my skin. And the smiles I gave you I carved into my lips.

I'm bleeding in the corners, can you see it?

But I wash it down.

One day at a time.

Like a jagged. Little. Pill.

I always said that if I could go anywhere, it had to be a place with an ocean. 

Not only because I love the way my ass looks in a bikini- 

but because a small part of me hopes that maybe, I will drown. 

Death is inevitable. And I swear to you I'm not crazy, I don't crave death. I don't crave the attention that comes after you die either- I crave the closeness of water. 

Waves engulf you. They beat you and choke you. They drag you in, close and tight caressing you; kissing every inch of your skin- ripping at your suit pulling your hair snatching every ounce of oxygen you have left just to throw you back to land again. 

Sound Familiar?