1 month ago. Friday, February 6, 2026 at 10:37 AM
Sometimes I stop watching tv shows or movies because I feel like there's too much going on for me to keep up with.
I say that because I think one of my biggest concerns is that the same thing will happen to me. I'm often stand-offish with people trying to know me because I know what a crazy life I have, and I fear that once others see it they'll stop talking to me like I stop watching those tv shows lol
I also find it hard to get to know people because I can't look ahead like I can when I'm reading a book and want to get a sneak peek at what's coming next. Relationships (platonic, romantic, dynamic, etc.) will always make me overthink because I know how easily I get attached to someone and I try to gauge the timing so I don't move too fast, but try pumping the breaks on an asteroid.
Life as I'm living it right now is all very new to me coming out of the situation that I used to be in, and I'm very grateful for the guidance that I have helping me through all of this. On one hand, I'm looking forward to what's coming next. On the other hand, my overthinking is asking "how long until they leave me too?" As a realist trying to be optimistic I tell myself to shut the hell up and be happy in the moment and don't think too much about what's coming, because that's how anxiety starts.
I don't know, this is just how my mind works.
More to come.
-AnnonBrat