Stealth and discipline

I believe that before entering in this lifestyle, healing one's traumas is the most important missions you can take on in your life.

BUT if you are trying to get over the wounds of your D/s dynamic/ BF/ or childhood, particularly the limited beliefs that someone has inadvertently programmed into you…

AND you are still in a relationship with the individual who created the original wound …

AND they are still engaging in the same behavior…

THEN the healing won't happen because you're continually being retraumatized.

If this applies to you, the solution is to create boundaries with the offending individual/individuals.

You can’t heal PTSD while you’re still on the battlefield.

Remember,You are the only You God created,. Allow yourself the opportunity for better.

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Have you ever had your women come to you with a problem or issue she’s having and by the end of the discussion you’re left feeling like you only compounded the problem by helping?

Allow me to unravel the mystery, women do not need a man to solve their problems unless they ask us to. So the next time she comes to you with a concern or problem, listen actively.

And eventually ask “ are you sharing for me to listen or to offer my thoughts” and she will tell you what she needs from you at that time.

Now not every problem or discussion is always met with that response, sometimes it’s clear what she needs and wants. However, In most cases, she wants you to be present with her, to gift her with your attention while unloading her mind and emotions. Do this correctly and she will appreciate you in her very special ways. 

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 Scarcity creates value.

The quickest way to get someone’s attention is to remove yours. When it comes to growing a woman’s attraction for you, less really is more. When a man wants to see a woman more than she wants to see him, he tends to try too hard, he over pursues and forces his narrative.

This causes a loss of attraction and her to back away and test more, because she can sense he is diminished by her lower interest or lack of availability.

Women love men who are stable, consistent, happy and indifferent, but grateful no matter how much or how little time they spend together.

Men who understand women know that sometimes they will spend a lot of time together, and other times may spend less. But you must allow her the space to choose u.

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If you’ve ever been Ghosted by a friend, family member, Dom or Sub. And felt blindsided without a clue of WTF happened. I’m going to help give you some closer, this is what the Ghoster is really saying by Ghosting you.

Hi,

I’m terrified of feeling uncomfortable, looking bad, and addressing emotionally mature conversations head on, but it’s really hard to admit.

Ultimately, I don’t want to feel any discomfort, or risk experiencing any emotions from you that are less than positive, so I just need to completely avoid the truth altogether, which is simply that I’m just not into this at this point in my life.

I have some work to do. And right now, my avoidance is more important to me than your feelings. Maybe one day I’ll be able to clear this up with you after becoming a functional adult. Until then: all the best! I hope you meet someone who is ready for what you have to offer, because I’m not yet.

Best,

Ghost.

Ask the tough questions up front, go deeper than the surface answers. Having people in one's life who are good communicators of their feelings, thoughts and impressions are the foundation of any healthy relationship. Pay attention to the red flags early on. 

For those in need, I hope this little note helps, because chances are, you are not the problem.

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In my experience many women are submissive by choice or by natural yearning.

Some Alpha submissions women crave to relinquish control to a strong, confident Dom type by nature as part of their need for mental & sexual escape from their everyday in-control persona.

Not being in control is a relief from constant decision making and being in charge during their busy, stressful daily lives.

I was speaking with a friend of mine who explained it to me this way, she said most people don’t understand that submission is partially an act of escapism from a women's own public personas...

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                         I want it 

                            All

Men don't sleep on this fact, aftercare is a crucial need for a women's emotional health. After a session, you want her to feel loved, cherished, and desired for her gift of submission. I will always give her some type of sensual reward based on her unique needs. One sub of mine loved it when I would read to her while her body settled into a ready-made bath. And other times a full body oil massage to soothe her exhausted body and mind would be needed. What is most essential is the emotional connection a submissive feels from me after offering her body up to such sexual extreme treatments I put them through. Having that conversation with her will help serve to have a long-lasting and satisfying dynamic.

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I love u

But, I can only fuck you like I hate you.

I love to see you cry, but I hate to see you sad.

You know me so well, you know there's only one way this thing will end, yet you always surrender.

I know that I'm the kink in your armor, the albatross around your heart.

But make no mistake, I've hated you from the start.

I hate you.

For making me love u.

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It is said that first impression is established in the first 7 seconds. During those precious seconds, she decides if you have a chance or will be flushed down her mental toilet, and the sad thing is the poor sap won't even know it.

So to help, here are a few personal pointers to help you stand out above the rest and hopefully, inspire a future connections.

First, let your opening be unique and imaginative, do this and you're already in the running.

Never start a message with Hey or So or with a physical compliment.

Instead, reference something meaningful about her profile. This will convey that you took the time to read through her profile and substance matters to you.

Next, when she replies keep the conversation light-hearted, if she's interested she will ask about you and your interest.

Next and this is extremely important, keep the emails limited to two or three exchanges. Too often men talk themselves right out of contention, and it suggests you have way more time on your hands than you should.

Good luck.

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Ladies if you want to make a man happy.

Just think about what makes you happy.

What makes you feel good and loved inside.

          What inspires and motivates you.

                Then do the opposite

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