2 months ago. Tue 06 Aug 2019 03:07:49 AM IDT
ok i am going to try and have a chat with all of you and hopefully my hamster doesn't get in the way.
I may not agree with everything / or even understand alot things, yet i believe in on going growth. So i want to share somethings that i have begun to understand and why so lets begin.
Being poly, we all think we know something about it but can we look into a bit.
Polyamory (from Greek πολύ poly, "many, several", and Latin amor, "love")
is the practice of, or desire for, intimate-relationships with more than one partner, with the consent of all partners involved. It has been described as "consensual, ethical, and responsible non-monogamy".
Now i have learn and begun to see that there are different level to this also. Because there are different types of relationships. The main to types are physical and emotional, and while many of us know this . do we understand that both types can be forms of poly in some cases? meaning only that you can be in emotional relationship with out it ever becoming physical.
let me explain a bit i have never thought of my self as being a poly person or in a poly relationship. so it is odd for me to say that i am poly in "A WAY" and i have grown to understand that . I have my pack and they all know who they are and who the others are. I look to them when i'm in need of comfort ,help to understand, or even just help me slow down. now let me also state that i look to WOLF first, as it should be. And that WOLF has helped and shared knowledge with them. and they all know that WOLF and i will always be there for them, and that there is not hiding of things said between them and either one of us, between WOLF and i. we love them dearly there forth like i said in "A WAY".
Now that that i have explained some of how i have grown. i want to also explain than to me cheating can happen in poly relationship this is where there are relationships that ARE NOT IN THE OPEN TO ALL INVOLVED. ( so with that being said outside of my pack i am not poly)
I think in a physical poly relationship it is also very important for all parties to know about each of and such. I think that if at all possibles all parties so meet or chat at least because lets say you are talking to someone ( for the sake of being on here we will say a Dom). and said Dom sayes oh yes im poly but my main sub isnt . That should be a red flag at least to me. now if the said Dom says yes we are a poly relationship so she will be ok with it or something. I suggest that you talk to that person your self, because
Although polyamory means being loved or loving multiple people, “it takes supreme trust, communication and intentional clarity,”
Maintaining open communication is integral to a polyamorous relationship so that issues do not arise.
also one of the most important things i have ever see write i think on things dealing with poly relationships is
"Dos and don’ts for happy polyamorous relationships" at https://www.morethantwo.com/polytips.html
and with in that you will find this stated:
Do take responsibility for your actions
"If there’s any rule that’s as absolute as the law of gravity, it’s the law of unintended consequence. Your actions do and always will have consequences, even if they were not what you intended; your life is shaped by the decisions you make and the things you do. And these decisions touch your partners, and your partners’ partners, sometimes in ways you didn’t anticipate.
I have met many people who seem to feel dis-empowered in their lives. This feeling of victimization saves them from having to take responsibility for their actions; but the downside is that it dramatically curtails their ability to take control of their own lives. It can also mean that they use what power they do have carelessly.
Taking responsibility for the consequences—even the unintended consequences—of your actions is sometimes unpleasant. Considering the effects of your decisions on the people around you is sometimes a lot of work. The upside to doing this work, though, is it empowers you, and lets you shape your life the way you want while still being compassionate and responsible to the people around you."
This is so true in all relationships. so take ownership of your actions and really mean it.
i hope my hamster didnt get to much in the way. and as always these are just my thoughts on things.