Day two began with laughter and admiring bruises incurred at the play party the night before. After breakfast we settled down to the day’s classes.
The first class was a discussion on assertiveness. We talked about the importance of being assertive as a submissive. The conversation turned to how assertive females are regarded in the workplace (a threat or bitchiness for some men, strong when it comes to other female supervisors). There was also a discussion of being assertive as a submissive and how challenging it can be to be assertive and submissive at the same time when it comes to one’s dominant. It can be a tightrope act and it can take some time figuring out the best way to communicate with one’s dominant when you are assertive.
The next class was taught by Dan and we talked about ways of deepening our kink experiences by getting to know ourselves better. A couple of the things I took away from this discussion was that meditation can be a useful tool to understand ourselves and creating a user manual about yourself is a terrific idea. Lady Moonfyre sat in on the discussion and suggested an addition to the user manual, an elevator pitch. Since I’ve spent most of the month talking about creating elevator pitches and introductions, I have at least somewhere to begin:
Hi, I’m Laurie. I’ve been a belly dancer, burlesque dancer, and knitter. I love studying women’s forgotten history and Shakespeare, who was a champion of bold women. I love inspiring others to be fierce and live with passion.
Obviously in a kink environment I’ll want to add that I’ve been in the kink lifestyle for fifteen years primarily as a submissive.
The other suggestion I loved was to keep a joy journal. I’ve been researching this a bit since I got home and discovered that it’s also a tool that can help depression.
The third class was taught by Dan and Dawn and it was about Sexual Ritual. The discussion focused on how to employ the senses for a deeper spiritual connection. The conversation began talking about sexual healers and sacred sexuality, primarily the Temple of Venus and Qadishtu. More info can be found here: http://youareatthecrossroads.com/potq/. I really enjoyed the different suggestions for using touch, sight, taste, smell, and hearing to deepen the connection you have with another person—whether it’s in a scene or with whom you are in a relationship. There was further emphasis on mindfulness as well.
The final class was a sort of Q&A with Dan and Dawn. It was fun to wrap things up with this class.
I was invited to participate in part of the Erotic Awakenings podcast that evening. Dan and Dawn wanted to know more about a terrific thing we have here called The Wasatch Academy for the Refinement of Ladies and Gentlemen of Leather. It’s a finishing school for leather folk. Here’s the link to the podcast: http://eroticawakening.libsyn.com/ea390-wasatch-academy-for-the-refinement-of-ladies-and-gentlemen-of-leather
It’s great to hear Dan and Dawn discuss what they thought of the weekend. It’s also been fun to see Lady Moonfyre’s posts in the weekend retreat group on Fetlife asking about the next one…which isn’t even in the planning stages yet! There’s more I’ll explore in a later blog post, but this gives you an idea of how amazing this retreat is. It’s a profound experience and C. and I are discussing ways we can integrate some of the stuff we discussed into our relationship.
