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Flying in Chains

This blog is where my truths lie. I share myself, stripped, whipped.
17 hours ago. Wed 20 Mar 2019 09:59:27 PM IST

It's a mess

Full of love

Full of longing

Dark with need

Want to serve you

Want to be punished

You're so sweet, so kind, so loving

So vanilla

It aches

3 days ago. Mon 18 Mar 2019 02:00:46 PM IST

Hard night

Dreams of anger and hate haunted me

A woman, grown

Can still be hurt

Two decades of evil to unravel.

I met you, still wrapped in pain

Taking care of your needs

Your pain

Neglecting mine

I'm so glad you're doing well

Still I wake

In tears

Rejection from  24 years ago

And abuse from 4 years ago

Color my nightmares

Bondage and discipline

Are therapy

But you're too scared to see it

You don't want to hurt me,

You told me last night

Because I've already been hurt

What you don't truly understand

Is by my consent

You'd set me free

3 days ago. Mon 18 Mar 2019 02:46:43 AM IST

I could sneak

If I wanted

I don't.

Being paranoid at the wrong people

Makes it easy

to cheat.

A million ways to do what I desire

But my heart and brain don't always match

This I know.

I have people who would fulfill my lust

People you don't know

People who don't care...

I'm not your enemy's type.

Just because they are a Dom

and I am a sub

Doesn't equal two.

My love,

I need what you won't give me.

Looking at the cuffs, the crop, the restraints in plain sight in our bedroom at night

Breaks my heart

Hurts my spirit

I feel lied to

I feel betrayed

I feel cheated.

"Once a year" will never be enough.

I can't walk away

But sometimes your gentleness hurts more than ropes ever could.

 

1 week ago. Wed 13 Mar 2019 01:18:42 AM IST

Into my fantasies I go

Into my dreams

After our sweet, romantic sessions

I dream of control

You love me

You respect me too much to hurt me

I know

But I escape into a world

Of velvet, ropes

Sexual fires

I know what you said

I won't make you

But I can dream

1 week ago. Thu 07 Mar 2019 03:41:56 PM IST

All I shared with you

Nothing changes

"I get it!" With hand up

To hush me.

All your public teasing

You don't follow through.

All my directions and gentle guidance

Frustrate you

Make you mad

You take me

But you don't control me.

How many times?

How many ways to say?

How many days

Until I get what *I* want?

2 weeks ago. Sun 03 Mar 2019 08:35:59 PM IST

"Listen to me." Thwack.

"Hold still." Drip.

"No talking. No noises." Buzz.

"Don't cream y--aw, you were disobedient. You were supposed to wait-," smack; "for-," smack; "my command." Two whacks.

Rope suspension.

Waiting...waiting...the anticipation building...

I am blindfolded. 

Will it be wax? An egg? A padd-

The alarm goes off.

2 weeks ago. Sun 03 Mar 2019 02:40:44 AM IST

Anxiety

Need to escape

Bondage is my release

But how do I escape my stress

When I married it?

When I work in it?

I can't just walk away.

Honey,

I need that pain.

Let's release our worries together.

You say you want to be my master, love.

Then do it.

3 weeks ago. Thu 28 Feb 2019 02:51:51 AM IST

If only you'd stop being scared.

I don't break

I give consent

My sexuality is a little bent.

Squeezing my neck gently was not 'extreme.'

Did you not see, hear, feel my response? 

My encouragement?

If only you'd control me more.

If only you'd understand I'm not an 'occasional' act.

If only you'd take over when I arrange the crop, rope, cuffs, mask, blindfolds, candles

If only you'd listen.

3 weeks ago. Tue 26 Feb 2019 05:59:53 AM IST

He wrapped his hands around my neck.

My heart beat faster

Clenched tighter

Moaned louder

On my way to the real O.

He let go.

"I don't like this. But I can tell you do!"

Yes. I DO.

More, PLEASE.

A lot more.

A little more.

Come down the dark path, my love.

Be my Lord.

3 weeks ago. Fri 22 Feb 2019 10:41:40 PM IST

"What do you want from me, Baby?"

"A Nap

A Backrub

A Good, Hard,

Spanking,

Binding,

Tied-Down,

Exhausting,

Wax-Dripping,

Dominating

Session From My Husband!"

"How about a "good as I can give it...." lay?"

"I can wait until you're less tired, hubby."

I ache

I hurt so bad

In my core,

In my heart.

I'm not a "thing"

Or just "your" girl with "kinks."

I'm a submissive with a bratty bent,

Waiting for you to understand my needs.

Be my Master, husband, like you promised.

You don't want to share,

You don't want me miserable.

Something. Must. Give.

I ache

I might break.