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Hidden In Plain Sight

The philosophies and adventures of a girl, just trying to make her way in the world.
“I’ve done every damn thing in the book wrong”... this is the story of that journey.
5 days ago. May 25, 2024 at 4:05 PM

You think that by me saying I don’t want to be with you again, is a rejection of you. It’s not. It’s a rejection of how you’ve behaved towards me and our relationship.

The rejection, the belittlement, the shame in not being enough in your eyes- not smart enough, not sexy enough, not political enough, not passionate enough… never enough. The constant giving and withdrawal of your affection and love, as I watched you parade your devotion around in front of me with your dog, and your sexuality around in front of me with a steady stream of others. I hoped that if only I could hang in there long enough, be loyal enough, forgiving enough, accepting enough, be… enough… someday those things might come my way. 
The relentless lying.

All of that had consequences. I stopped trusting you. And eventually I stopped being in love with you.

I gave you the power of being responsible for an option. You couldn’t be responsible with it. And eventually I ran out of reasons as to why I should keep asking you to try. So I am merely removing that option from you. That’s all. Removing the pressure from both of us. We love each other much better this way, as we are now.

You will always have a big place in my heart, and if you so choose, my life. But I deserve much better treatment than what either of us have believed all this time. It’s time for me to start caring for myself, and that has to start with us. 

2 weeks ago. May 15, 2024 at 5:59 AM

Dark Crystal
True Romance
Life is Beautiful
Angel-A
Leon (The Professional)
A Few Good Men
The Lost Boys
Harvey Krumpet
Amélie
I am Sam

2 weeks ago. May 12, 2024 at 12:42 AM

'When someone loves you, the way they say your name is different. You just know that your name is safe in their mouth.'

~Billy~ age 4

3 weeks ago. May 6, 2024 at 9:01 PM

Being in a committed relationship is amazing.

Being single, committed to a relationship with ourselves is amazing.

Being in either and looking at greener grasses on the other side SUCKS!

Most people are in relationships and constantly evaluating whether they should be somewhere else (alone or with someone else)

Some other are single and constantly analyzing how and what they'd have to do to be in a relationship.

Meaning we suffer being single..

And we *definitely* suffer being together..

The problem is rarely the relationship.

The issue is the lack of commitment (or the weak foundations upon which it was built.)

Lots of people just slowly 'degrade' from lovers into roommates, into parents, into co-habitants and children-entangled humans who barely like each other.

Relationships often move from "dating" towards "exclusivity" without a proper declaration of vows, agreements and commitments.

Leave aside expectations...

It just sort of "Happens"


Like a boy transitioning into a man...


It just "happens"..

But when and how?!

Very few know.

Hence the abundance of 'man-boys' or unintegrated, pleasure-driven males who are still out to get from the feminine.

They’re umbilical cord seeking to be plugged in into their next lover, party, vice or business venture.

Unable to stand in their feet as Men because there was never clarity about what this transition meant, when it happened and what shifts it required.


So they are part Men part Boys..

And women often pay for this.


On the other hand lots of girls age but never become women.

Insecurity-ridden, daddy-pleasing, attention-seeking, validation-craving girls of all ages abound.

Unaware of their power, they give it up for attention, comfort and often security.

Unaware of their power they put themselves through excruciating relationships, often using their body as a bargaining chip with which to secure a partner.

Traders of love.

Adult girls craving so deeply to experience themselves as women, yet unaware of what that looks like or if / when that happened..

They've got their period.

Period.


But what about being a Woman?

See?

Our culture is not designed to bring clarity.

It all "just happens" when nobody is watching...

 

You're just supposed to get it.

And you better get it right!

(Like filing your taxes.. 🤣)

And if you don't, there's severe consequences..


Grey zones are the mothers of chaos.

Messy soups of unconsciousness, complexity and confusion.

That's what most relationships are because there were never any clear vows..

No clear agreements..

Or declarations of who we are for one another.

Shaky foundations will never allow for you to build something that lasts..

At best it looks pretty but once you move in, it feels unsafe.

The smallest of winds makes the whole thing shake and crumble..


That's 99% of people in their relationships.

Vagueness breeds conflict, disappointment and pain.

Commitment on the other hand brings clarity, confidence and growth.

Being single or in a relationship are both amazing experiences, if you're clear about them and choose them willingly.

Otherwise, they can become life's greatest torture.

If we don't know what game we're playing, we will always end up losing.

 


~Nicolas Canon~

3 weeks ago. May 2, 2024 at 11:31 PM

I can’t remember the last time I felt this level of elation. Or exhilaration. I’ve never fallen this hard so quickly. It was love at first sight. But each encounter just keeps taking me to new levels.


Once upon a time I thought I’d be writing these words about a man…

But I’m not.


For once in my life I decided to say “f” it… I don’t care anymore. I’m doing something for me, regardless of how strange it seems.


So I joined a jiujitsu class. (Yes, I somewhat have a tendency to jump in the deep end 🤪 lol).


For months I’ve been pondering on what kind of hobby might be something I’d enjoy. Knitting? Crocheting? Painting? Photography? Hiking? Dancing?

All of these things appealed, but they didn’t ignite any passion. I like to move! And I’ve always somewhat skated the outskirts of eastern philosophy, however, never delved in. As an athlete in a past life, I’ve always loved sports. And strangely, perhaps from my upbringing? (my father taught us self-defence techniques all throughout childhood), always held a fascination with fighting. The violence, to a small degree, but much much more… the discipline required. The time put in to master yourself. The wholeness that is required. Not solely physical. Mental. Spiritual. The completeness has always held a fascination for me. The freedom to seek “perfection” (those moments when everything just comes together). The obvious internal stillness that comes from training for years to achieve mind-body connection. Martial arts, to me, is like the philosophy of life put into practice. A beautiful dance. Which encompasses the reality that beauty and violence coexist quite naturally. Much like nature.


I’m rambling because I am in love. Quite unexpectedly. I feel like Snow White, kissed back to life after laying dormant for so long, waiting to find something that would bring me back to life. Last time I tried using a person for that. It didn’t work. Surprise surprise. Obviously I didn’t realise that’s what I was doing at the time, but I realised not long ago that it was time to stop hoping someone else would do this for me. And thank goodness. I didn’t know that the joy is in the journey. Perhaps that’s what age teaches us.


As someone who was always so results driven, I have always been terrified or dismissive of the steps required to get somewhere. Fear of failure, fear of feeling stupid, fear of judgement, fear of expectation, fear fear fear. It always kept me trapped. It kept me small. Scared of being who I am. And scared of showing that to others. I grew up in an environment that was an emotional war zone, so I learned very early to keep everything close so as to not have it used as ammunition against me. Ironically my brother popped up last night into my message box to remind me of our wonderful family pattern. Only this time I decided I wasn’t going to let him take this from me. No one will. It is mine and mine alone. If I continue or not will be my decision… not because others decide for me, using shame or belittlement or a desire to keep me trapped in how they think I should be. Finally I am standing up for myself. And I feel strong 😊

 


I always knew, deep down, love would set me free. I just didn’t realise it would be my own love.

 

 

 

 


to be continued…

1 month ago. April 27, 2024 at 10:25 PM

‘How would you feel about wearing my mum’s lingerie?’ he asks.

Hmm 🤔 ‘how would I feel about it?’ I ask myself.

This takes my realisation that I attract mummy’s boys, to a whole new level lol.

How do I feel about it? Well…

He’s at least not looking for someone to be his mum by cooking and cleaning up after him and making all the decisions for him! 😜


What do we do when we cross paths with people whose fetishes take us out of our comfort zone? Me personally? I sit back and think about it and observe what comes up. How does it make me feel? Does it feel harmful? Does any of it resonate with my own kinks perhaps in different ways?

And then I ask questions. Not the “what’s wrong with you,” type of questions that we hope to never hear from this community… but the “tell me more about this,” type questions.


My desire is to explore. To explore with another. To be able to venture into ourselves and each other and see what’s there. The willingness to be vulnerable enough to explore our deepest, darkest fantasies can take us to unexpected places. Sometimes that takes us to new levels. Sometimes it takes us in different directions.

To be honest, if I had to name my biggest kink, it would be learning about other people’s kinks. It fascinates me. And I am so enamoured by the bravery to put oneself out there and say, ‘this is me… yes I know by society’s standards I’m considered weird… I’ve been told enough times… and yet, here I am, laying it out before you in the hope that maybe, just maybe, you’ll accept that this “thing” isn’t necessarily the entirety of “who I am”… or it is.’


These are the places where magic is found. This is the place I prefer to reside with others. One could call it the “taboo” places. I prefer to call it the truth of who we are. How freeing it is to openly speak about every part of ourselves without fear. To share porn without having to censor. To watch that porn together! To create our own play! To have access to the deepest recesses of eachother without that fear of rejection. To feel safe. To have someone willing to allow us to explore in a way that is “safe, sane, and consensual.”

For me personally, it’s no different to dressing up as a secretary or a school girl or a hooker.
But to him, it’s freedom. And that’s beautiful.


I wonder if I can get him to dress up as Santa? 🤔🤪

 

 

 

to be continued…

1 month ago. April 19, 2024 at 3:10 AM

Go Home

By Lucius

 

 

I'm your dolly,

Stuffed with extra baggage

Lay me down to shut my eyes

Beaded gazes

Lead you nowhere anyways

Press on my heart, I will say

Press on my heart I will say

 

I am lonely

With a static smile

I think my stitching's coming loose

I'm hard headed,

But completely soft inside

I'm all wound up and still

The only thing that I can say is

 

I don't need you anyway

I don't need you, go home

Go home

I don't need you anyway

I don't need you, go home

Go home

 

I'm your dolly,

Stuffed with extra baggage

Lay me down to shut my eyes

Beaded gazes

Lead you nowhere anyways

Press on my heart, I will say

Press on my heart I will say

 

I don't need you anyway

I don't need you, go home

Go home

I don't need you anyway

I don't need you, go home

Go home

Go home

Go home

Go home

Go home

Go home

1 month ago. April 7, 2024 at 10:11 PM

‘What you do makes a difference. You just have to decide what kind of difference you want to make’…



Superhero name: Atomic Boom 💥

Superpower: Inner critic fairy. Sprinkling fairy dust of unconditional love onto the inner critic to silence it and bring ourselves back to that place of belief and hope in ourselves and others 💕 

2 months ago. March 28, 2024 at 8:47 PM

‘What are you?’ He says firmly.

‘I’m your slut, Daddy,’ I reply, trying to speak without removing his cock from my mouth.

‘Yes, you are,’ he says, lust dripping from his lips.

So much drool and sweat I can no longer tell them apart, my head bobs as I feel his hand run over my back. He eases my dress hem up and whack! A hand to the ass. I moan. I can’t help it, it escapes my throat before I can even think. Whack! Another. And another. He keeps going until I begin squirming. 
‘Awww, does that hurt?’ He taunts. His voice painted with mockery.
I nod.

‘I think I’m going to take your ass and cum in there instead,’ he says. ‘You haven’t been a good girl enough to deserve my cum.’

‘Do you want me to cum in your ass?’

‘Yes, Daddy,’ I shake my head and gurgle a reply at the same time.

‘No you don’t. You want my cum inside you,’ he replies.

Even though I smile, he won’t see it because I don’t stop trying to edge my way deeper down his cock.

‘Good sluts go all the way down.’ His words echoing over and over in my mind.

‘Don’t they?’

‘Yes, Daddy.’

‘Yes,’ he repeats.

 

His fingers slide around my ass and find their way to my pussy, which of course is dripping. They slide inside and I let out another moan. It feels so good to have his fingers in me while I’m choking on his cock.

But he’s got other plans. Fingers lubed from my juices, he slides one into my ass. Then another.

I lift my head to take a breath and groan.

‘I didn’t tell you you could stop sucking, did I?’ He says forcefully.

I shake my head. ‘No, Daddy,’ and return my mouth to its place, trying to concentrate while I feel his fingers searching deeper and deeper. He knows this is my weakness.

‘You’re making a lot of noise… does this hurt?’

I shake my head, no. Quite the opposite. I think I’m going to cum.

 

‘Roll over onto your back,’ he says.

I do. And look up at his face.

Oh, that look.

He wants me. He wants to be inside me.

I lay back and spread my legs for him, as he adjusts and wipes sweat from his brow.

It’s so hot in here. Steamy. The windows fogged up very quickly. I gave up trying to retain any dignity long ago. Sweat and drool dripping from everywhere. For once I no longer cared how I must look. It was pure lust and want and need.

I wanted him inside me in any way. That glorious cock.

 

Entering me, he looks into my eyes.

Another new one for me, for once I meet his gaze and don’t look away in shyness. I know my gaze matches his. We feed each other. I undo my wrap dress so I can display myself to him. I want him to see all of me.

As he kisses me, my head bangs against the car door, legs wrapped around him trying to pull him into me. More, more, more.

 

‘I’m a more-ist,’ my ex had once said to me.

But I think he was wrong. I’m a more-ist. Any female that loves cock knows this feeling. That desire to feel full from the inside. Filled. My body is so receptive to him I crave him even whilst he’s inside me.

 

He pulls back. ‘Suck my cock.’

I scramble to find him with my mouth, no longer caring if anyone is around. It’s just us. He does that. Brings my focus so clearly to just us. Just that moment.

‘Do you like sucking your juices from me?’ He asks.

I do.

‘Yes, Daddy.’

‘Good girl.’ ‘Yes, that’s it.’ ‘That feels so good.’ ‘You just needed my cock, didn’t you?’

I nod.

 

He grabs my head and tells me to open my throat, and drives himself down my throat. I gag. No longer horrified at this natural response, I’ve come to love it actually.

‘Yes,’ he says. ‘That’s it.’

He pulls my head up by my hair roughly and says, ‘take a breath.’ I do. Then he shoves my mouth back down.

He’s so different to what I’ve known in the past. That mixture of beast I love, yet with the tenderness that’s always been lacking.

Even when he’s rough or hurting me, strangely he can also portray that he cares at the same time. It opens me to him like I’ve not experienced before. Brings all of me to the front. Feeling safe to be exposed.

 

‘I’m going to fuck your ass.’ ‘Go in dry,’ he says. ‘Move onto your hands and knees.’

I get into position. But when he feels my wetness he slides into my pussy instead. I lean back into him with each thrust as he whispers the words I was hoping for.

‘No, I’m going to cum in you.’

‘You want my cum, don’t you?’

I do.

‘Yes please, Daddy,’ I say. And mean it.

I don’t recall ever wanting to be constantly dripping with someone’s cum, but somehow he makes me crave it. The thought of walking around with his seed trickling out of me is something I never imagined I’d want so badly.

He rolls me onto my back and gathers himself up. Somehow he seems bigger. Fills the space. He looks in my eyes as he wraps a hand around my throat and squeezes. I gasp and moan. I close my eyes, but then open them again as I relax into his grip. I look directly into his eyes and let go.

‘Yes,’ I say silently. ‘Yes, I am Yours.’

 

He kisses me as I whisper, ‘please Daddy, fill me with your cum.’

His body shudders as he does.

2 months ago. March 22, 2024 at 1:47 AM


A poem without a title

 

Eyes closed, she hears him approach.

Feels his gaze, as eyes fall upon prey.

Smelling his scent, as he moves almost silently.

 

Unable to prevent it, a smile forms at the corners.

Ever so slightly, she moves.

Anticipation.

 

He does this.

Makes her body perform under his spell.

A puppeteer. A magician.

 

Sounds. Smell. The charge in the air between.

That’s all there is.

Breathing. Feeling. Thoughts.

 

Calm. Methodical. Composed.

Safe.

Exposed.

 

Her soul opens to him, as do her legs.

And he sinks in, as though he belonged there all along.

 

Tears fall softly, as he takes what’s his.

And fills the empty spaces.

 

What is this?

Who are you?

Where have you been?

 

 ~Bunnie~

 


Original challenge from TreasureMe:

https://thecage.co/blog/userblog.php?blog_id=28722