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A little of me...

My thoughts, my feelings and whatever may come to mind.... This will be interesting as I have never had a blog before but there is a first time for everything.... Right??
14 hours ago. Mon 15 Jul 2019 08:06:16 PM IDT

I have been doing a lot of thinking.... maybe too much thinking...

In this lifestyle, who is it that dictates what is real and what is not?? Who is a Fom/fub or a Dom/sub?? We are all different. Different likes and dislikes. We do things differently. A different approach to things or how we learn.

Yes.... I do realize that there are certain things that really do show who is genuine and who is fake... I get that.... but outside of being an asshat or whatever label you want to put on it... There is no dynamic that is exactly the same as the next...

I know that I am still pretty new and learning a lot... so I feel I have no real right to say what is genuine and what isn't... but sometimes I fear I was too quick to judge someone based off of what I was told was "real"...

<3 always,

ME

15 hours ago. Mon 15 Jul 2019 07:15:14 PM IDT

Butterflies... My favorite!!

When I was little, I told my dad I wanted to be a bird and fly away to far off places...

"You're too pretty to be a bird... You are blossoming in to a beautiful butterfly sweetie!"

From that day on, I was his butterfly!!

<3 always,

ME

P.S. I'm sorry for the sappy blogs... I'm just really missing my dad lately... I wish he was here.

1 day ago. Sun 14 Jul 2019 11:56:59 PM IDT

Prepare for a longer than expected post... and maybe a tear or two.

I really enjoyed this picture and really disliked it all at the same time...

Growing up, I loved listening to my mom play the piano and knew that one day I'd learn how to play as well. In my early teens, my parents signed me up for piano lessons and I took off with it. I remember how proud my parents were at how quickly I excelled.

At the end of the year recital, my 2nd year of lessons. I remember playing Moonlight Sonota, not an extremely difficult song, but definitely a lengthy one. I finished the song, stood up from the piano, looked over at my parents and my dad was standing, clapping, tears rolling down his cheeks. He was so proud of the job that I had done.

A week later... he was diagnosed with cancer... Two months later, laying in his bed, wasting away... "Sweetie, please go play piano for me, one more time..." I knew the time had come that I had to perform my best... one last time for daddy... 

I sat at the piano, not knowing what to play... I chose "Butterfly Kisses" by Bob Carlisle. The song I played at my very first recital and a song daddy use to sing to me... I cried through the whole song. As I finished it, my sister stood in the doorway, trying to control her tears... daddy had taken his last breath shortly before I finished playing... I continued to play for a few more hours, not wanting to talk to anyone or go see daddy to confirm that he was gone... The last song I played... "It is well with my soul"...

I haven't touched a piano since... it will be 20 years next month that angels and butterflies carried my daddy away... I miss him so...

<3 always,

ME

2 days ago. Sun 14 Jul 2019 05:52:00 AM IDT

It is interesting how this one spoke to me... I thought of how we, as non collared submissives, hold everything in our hands. Waiting, wanting, yearning for the right Dom to come in to our lives and prove that they deserve our servitude... It has become a very strong thought in my mind and in my heart. 

<3 always,

ME

3 days ago. Sat 13 Jul 2019 05:33:08 AM IDT

A secluded get away...

How I wish I had this right now....

<3 always,

ME

4 days ago. Thu 11 Jul 2019 11:32:39 PM IDT

... and not the gift of submission...

 

So a little while back, in one of my blogs I had my mentioned how JD asked if he could still send me my birthday gift.... it arrived today. (I think he really planned that out as today is the day)

I had questioned myself and him before placing the beautiful bracelet on my wrist... as something I have learned is that many different kinds of jewelry represent a day collar and a braclet is one of them. 

I did contact JD and asked him about it. He did admit when he originally got the braclet, that is what he was wanting and hoping... After I left him though, he just wanted to give me something nice for my birthday...

It is a beautiful piece of jewelry and I do love it... I wish things could have been different...

<3 always,

ME

4 days ago. Thu 11 Jul 2019 08:18:35 PM IDT

Mermaids are one of my favorite mythical creatures!! They are graceful and elegant with a mysterious side to them!! 

What is your favorite??

<3 always,

ME

5 days ago. Wed 10 Jul 2019 05:24:12 PM IDT

Today's picture is kinda special as I am a Cancer and my Zodiac sign is the crab.

I hope you enjoy!!

<3 always,

ME

 

6 days ago. Wed 10 Jul 2019 04:16:59 AM IDT

..... Desire..... 

Such a simple word and it can basically sum up why I submit...

 

I DESIRE To serve...

I DESIRE to please...

I DESIRE rules...

I DESIRE structure...

I DESIRE nurturing...

I DESIRE guidance...

I DESIRE teachings...

I DESIRE to be pushed...

I DESIRE to be tested...

I DESIRE my walls to be torn down...

I DESIRE to be cherished...

I DESIRE to be adored...

I DESIRE to be loved...

I DESIRE to be wanted...

I DESIRE for you to DESIRE me...

I DESIRE... 

YOU

 

<3 always,

ME

 

 

"I Want You To Need Me"

I wanna be the face you see when you close your eyes
I wanna be the touch you need every single night
I wanna be your fantasy
And be your reality
And everything between

I want you to need me
Like the air you breathe
I want you to feel me
In everything
I want you to see me
In your every dream
The way that I taste you, feel you, breathe you, need you
I want you to need me
Like I need you

I wanna be the eyes that look deep into your soul
I wanna be the world to you
I just want it all
I wanna be your deepest kiss
The answer to your every wish
And all you ever need

I want you to need me
Like the air you breathe
I want you to feel me
In everything
I want you to see me
In your every dream
The way that I taste you, feel you, breathe you, need you
I want you to need me

'Cause I need you
More than you could know
And I need you
To never never let me go
And I need to be deep inside your heart
I just want to be everywhere you are

I wanna be the face you see when you close your eyes
I wanna be the touch you need every single night
I wanna be your fantasy
And be your reality
And everything between

I want you to need me
Like the air you breathe
I want you to feel me
In everything
I want you to see me
In your every dream
'Cause, baby, I taste you, feel you, breathe you, need you

I want you to need me
Like the air you breathe
I want you to feel me
In your everything
I want you to see me
In your every dream
'Cause, baby, I taste you, feel you, breathe you, need you

I want you to need me
Like I need you
Like I need you
Like I need you

6 days ago. Tue 09 Jul 2019 08:43:14 PM IDT

I have this coloring app on my phone... my inner little LOVES to color!! Though I would rather use my own use of colors and a coloring book, it is frowned upon at work and my daughter steals them at home... so I do what I can to feed my little me!!

With this app, there is a picture of the day. So I decided that I will post it here every day once I've finished it!! Add a little color to my blog!! I hope you enjoy it too!!

 

<3 always,

ME




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