Fantasy experience and thoughts of a sub

Cold as steel has taken on a antire new meaning since finding  BDSM so many years ago ...

I am oblivious to so many things, life gets busy ... BDSM slows me down it forces me to take stock and pay attention, to my partners, the individual sensations, the reaction my body has to sensations.    I find myself paying attention to sounds more carefully because I'm usually blindfolded.   When doing wax play I smell the candles.   I noticed every drip every drop I know exactly what medium causes what feeling on the skin.  What in turn those feelings do to my body.  I know what sounds make a dominant happy.   A growl out of a dominant voice can sendcan send Shivers up and down my spine, even if I hear them in a vanilla setting.  

The attention to detail the focus it all becomes what one  Dominant Expressed ......

if you can't get her mind you will never have her body.  

If you have her mind... Every part of her life you will be connected to.  

One of the area's I noticed this most is the sound, the feel of metal.. near the human skin.  I have been away from BDSM for many years, but let me  hear a chain drop to the floor, let me see a cold hard steel chain in a man's hands and my mind wanders  my juices begin to flow, and all of the sensations if cold steel next to hot human skin come.back with a vengeance.  

See A metal table?  I immediatly feel the contradiction of a hot body laying against that ice cold steel.  Nipples going achingly immediately errect.  

Hear a chain clink to the floor ? I feel that chain weighing me down wrapped around my body unmercifully containing flesh that wants to escape.  

I see it suspending a beautiful submisives safely as her/ his master plays with her / his body .  I see the indentations it left after a submissive strains against the binds.  

I see a steel collar  being used to express the love for a submissive..and the subs devotion to their master.  

I see a clamp? It is absolutely unforgiving, yet my body  experiences  the intensity of that  release, each and every time, simply by seeing it ...

 when that clamp finally releases the flesh it has sinched, turned a lovely shade of red/ purple or other beautiful color, I actually feel those feelings and my nipples harden just seeing that unforgiving steel.   

Needless to say when times have been devoid of  partners, I can go into a hardware store and lose myself in the sensations.  

I thank every dom I  ever had for getting my mind and giving me the gift of paying attention to my senses. 

It has brought so much pleasure throughout the years  

The ride my hands duct taped behind my back ..a vibrating egg in his pussy ...my eyes covered ...the wind going through my hair , the music blaring his deep resonating voice rocking my soul....

My pussy was dripping wet it was everything I could do to not cum...but that wasn't allowed ...he would bring the speed up and bring the speed back down.  Tell me punkin what do you want... "I want to cum Sir",  "not yet" he says ...we have stops to make ... I hunkered down controlled my breathing

..and worked to not dissapointed him.. he turns the radio down and is talking to me in his deep voice ... I feel his hand on my breasts...pinching my nipples as he tells me how pleased he is with how I have prepared for him...

he grabbed the clothespins... apparently, out of my purse ...and clips one on the very top of my left nipple...I gasp...he gives it a good pinch....the fondles my breast..as it sends shock waves straight to my  cunt Everytime he grabbed the clothespin...another shock wave..the vibe is starting to slide...so I cock my pelvis and squeeze to keep it inside...we pull over...the car stops ..I hear nothing but his breathing.and the vibrating from deep inside me....no cars no sounds I am overwhelmed from sensations....breathing deeper following instructions to just feel what he is doing to me.my head starts to swirl ..I feel him enter my shirt for my right breast..it receives the same treatment as my left...cupping them squeezing them...I hear his growling...as he watches me worm..and squirm at his touch .  

Now tell me.he says.,.tell me what is on your mind... I begin ..to tell him about the sensations...he quick twists each clothespined nipple hard..I Yelp and his growling gets harder and angrier...I said !!! TELL me what is on your mind ..tell me what is clowding your time with me ...I can't speak ..I can't explain ..I apologise..and say it is just so awful ..I can't ..as the vibe in me is cranked...I become almost breathless..._oh my God I am gonna cum Sir...I can't help it .... 'I said no" he roars in my ear....grabs my neck with his thumb on either side of my throat...not yet...he kisses me deeply shoving his tongue down my throat...exploring the inside of my mouth as he pressed into my nipples and my arms pinned behind my back.   Lifting my jaw up to meet his lips ..my air is gone...panic sets in ..he knows this is my trigger..

. I start to struggle....I can't move with the weight of him on me...the vibe inside of me.my nipples screaming...I start to kick my legs...I can't breathe...he let's off my neck but still smothers me.with his weight and his mouth ..

..I am.gone...I explode in a massive orgasm shuddering losing all control.. he inhales my breath ..he .seems to suck the life out of me...and I begin to fall apart....he holds me tight as I shudder in his arms...his hand is down between my thighs forcing them apart...I feel his fingers go deep inside his drenched...pussy probing turning clamping down on  me...

I am over the top ..I collapse against the back of my seat ...I catch my breath...and look up at him ..I say I am sorry sir...I could not help it ....

He has a mischievous look in his eyes and goes that's okay..

. I said oh please  sir...I can't ...he said ..your right you can't.  He twists the clothespins on my nipples adds another one to each straightens me back up helps me out of the car takes my glasses off... .helps me  stand up we are in the middle.of the country ...pulled off a side road...i  stretch my my legs he offers me.some.water to drink takes a drink himself...takes my underwear out of my.purse lays them on my.seat......he pulls out a butt plug my eyes widen a little larger then I am used to ....he said bend over ...I do...he taps my ass with his hand...I love how his hands feel on me..he rubs it spanks it rubs it spanks it..he sticks the plug  in my pussy ...then brings to my.mouth said suck on it ..I do...it is dripping I greedily suck it ...he takes it back out of my.mouth continues to turn my bottom pink ...while all of a sudden I feel the plug slide deep into my ass with a thud !!! It takes my breath away. ..he pulls me straight up backward his arm around my neck choking me growling in my ear .. I am glad you enjoyed your cum my punkin..I am on my.tip toes fighting for air ...pressed tight to him .I can feel his cock in my.back....through his clothes omg I love to feel him...

I told you not to cum..you dissapointed me...his grip gets tighter ..my back up against him.i stammered I am sorry ...

That is twice you have disappointed me today punkin....I am.sorry sir .....I squeek out ..".I am not used to  you dissappointing me...I asked you to tell me what is in our way ...and I asked you not to cum.  You know I like to taste your cum....you took that from me...I am not happy"

..I said "sir what can I do to make it up to you ...I am so sorry .I  didn't mean to dissapoint you" my voice trailing off ..he turns me around... Looks at me with his deep brown eyes ...lifts my chin up pushes me.against the car puts his hand around my throat..and said... I said you are mine.. your troubles are my troubles... Everything that affects you affects me... He takes my underwear and shoves it in my mouth... "Now leave it there until you're ready to talk"... He spins me around bends me over text The Wooden Spoon out of my purse and begins to strike the back of my ass and my thighs with it... He's hurting.... I'm trying to protest and I cannot... He grabs each arm brings it around behind me, and begins to wrap them and rub up to my elbow... Inn Between.. striking my ass and thighs... Tears are coming to my eyes....it hurts ...he is now angry with me.. the blows continue....his mood has changed.   I can feel the tender flesh welting feeling very hot...he stops rubs my bottom with his hand turns me around doesn't speak and sits me back  in the car. Ohh it starts.. I am crying now he doesn't look at me .... He takes the remaining 2x2s. Places them over my eyes and tapes them in place...spreads my thighs and checks the vibe in me ...

I am dripping . He takes the underwear out of my mouth and I hear him loosen his belt ..and unzip his pants..he takes my head and said lick me ..he offers me his balls .and I begin to slurp... He knows I love to do this ...he knows nothing turns me on more than to take him in my.mouth and make love with my mouth to his cock and balls ,.

 I want to use my hands but I can't..he enters deep to the back of my throat ...I gag some...he must be frustrated..because he is Much rougher than normal ..he begins to fuck my face ..he is gagging me..this is not like him...  The vibe goes to high...my ass is on fire..mmy arms are aching .....I can't see ...I hear his growling before he shoots his load deep down my throat...and then washes my face with his cum....he leans into me .as the last of his load is on my face...

I collapse..into him.he pushes me.back ...he shoves the underwear back in my mouth says nothing .and zips up goes to the other side of the car gets in ...

Starts car ..starts to drive...radio on heavy rock ..again not like him... We are speeding ...I can feel it trying to remain my balance... I am nervous ...not scared because I know him but not this him... The tears start to flow I am frustrated , hurting , sitting there bound gagged..and blinded ..covered in his cum... With a .man who is not my normal..

The tears flow as I fight them back ..and flow and flow and flow and he keeps driving.....finally what seems like an eternity they end...covered in cum tears ...and I bow my head completely  spent...

The music goes down we slow down and come.to a stop...it is dark now ...

He turns the vibe off ..removes the 2x2s ...unties my arms...

Hands me.my purse said fix your make up  ..I am blinking and I do ..don't wipe my cum.off your face ...... I don't in .shock still ...quieter than normal ...he said we have reservations ..he helps me out of the car closes the door...presses me against the car . Tilts my chin up ...kisses me slightly ..and whispers ..now we talk ...I know your ready now ...I looked at him  confused.....but lowered my eyes and walked in with him to a beautiful restaurant...

I go to the restroom ..he Said don't take the vibe out ...we still have work to do .

I sit down a glass of wine. Or two ...and I start talking ....

End of part two 

The ride part one !

I  was never a 24/7 lifestyler.  When I was in my twenties I  played with four or five doms who are in the closet and married.  I was single and no attachment.  I met some of the most amazing men during that time.  I had one his name was sir Rob.  We were friends we had met on a Yahoo chat.  He was married and the in the closet, yet a very loving and supportive online Dom.   We talked for hours as we explored our interest in BDSM, but also life in general.  

I was going through a particularly rough patch in my life.. he said let's take a ride.  

I was to wear a black mid thigh skirt,  a black lace tank top,  a black lace hook in front bra, a coral cardigan and no underwear.flat sandles.  

I was to bring in my purse a pair of black lace underwear.  I was to drive to the mall sit in my car hands in my lap, close my eyes and wait for him. 

 My toenails and nails were to be painted blood red   My lipstick was to be a neutral brown. I was to wear  copper eye shadow, brown eyeliner but no mascara.  I was to be shaved clean the day before, and I was to wear Happy perfume.   

 I was to have a scarf on my neck tied losely on the side.   In my purse I was to have 8 clothespins a wooden spoon with a handle 1/4 in diameter handle.  I was to have 4 2x2 bandages and double sided tape  in my hands as well.

As I prepare for Sirs ride, I relish in the details that I rarely pay attention to . I must focus and prepare exactly as he asks..  each task that I do.. I do for him.  Each step I take , I know will please him.  I think I hate vanilla relationships... there is so much guessing sir tells me everything I need to do to make him happy.  In the chaotic world of vanilla and life everything is a choice or a guess... Here if I do what I am told I will make him happy.  In real life I make decisions all the time for everyone.  I am a people pleaser but I am a control freak.  

I love that he tells me what I need to do to make him happy.  I love that he cares enough to tell me what to do.  I am a large woman I don't feel pretty, but he makes me feel pretty.. he makes me feel wanted.  Each step I take I become more aroused and  excited.  

I drive to the mall sit in the parking lot.  I place the sunglasses two by twos in my lap and I close my eyes.  And I wait.  

Within 15 minutes my car door opens I I hear his deep voice saying you look beautiful.  He takes the sunglasses 2x2s  and tape out of my hands... Says open your eyes.  I look up at his deep brown eyes.. he gives me his hand I got out of the car.  I look into his eyes and I almost want to burst into tears.  he has the most loving look in his deep brown eyes.   He is pleased with what I've done.  He said follow me.. he leads me to the door of his convertible and opens the door can I get in.  He closes the door walks around to his side and gets in.  The top is up on the convertible. 

He hands me a remote control egg vibe, and tells me to lift my one leg and insert as deep as I can in his vagina.  He tells me to place two clothes pins on each side of my labia.  I do so ..I am so wet ... He says taste yourself.  I stick my middle finger inside  of me...and bring to my lips , and insert the tip of my glistening finger in my mouth ..he directed me to take the top of my seat and recline it about 20 degrees.  

I follow every instruction.  I am so wet...and I am so on fire ..

He proceeds to place the two by twos in the lens of my glasses tapes them in, and places that on my face gently. He presses them up against my nose and my  vision is gone  except  for my limited  peripheral vision. 

He begins to drive .  He said talk to me.   Tell me what is going on.   This means sir and sub are  done for now .. ..I am to switch to regular conversation, and I am to tell him what is going on in my life ..  He drives out of the city and up to the country... I am slow to talk ..it is not coming out the way it should , my issues are troubling to me..and I am hitting a wall ..

He glanc at me and knows I am holding back, not to be bratty, but because I can't talk . I can't let go ...

The egg begins to vibrate inside of me...the clothespins are rattling....on my labia ...I look up at him...and he said it's okay punkin, you don't have to talk just yet.. ...close your eyes and ride ......... ....the vibrating egg is powerful ...it is raising my temperature ...he fluxuates the speed ...I am worming in my seat ..he Said ...no just feel it ...he turns the radio up and we drive .  "Feel the bunps in the road punkin ..focus on what I am doing to your body ...  feel the sensation...let everything else go . you are mine to play with ..he pulls over  unties the scarf on my neck, and reties it much tighter ..I can breathe , however as I felt his hands touch my neck and tie the scarf so tight his hands Cradle my neck ..he leans over and  growls in my ear ..sticks two fingers in the already tight scarf..Twists it tighter and says "...I told you to let go....you are mine now, do you understand?"

I gasp for air he untwists his finger,...I said "yes sir."

I hear him rustle for something. I hear the rip off duck tape .....He said now lean forward, and  place your hands  behind your back ...he ties my hands with duck tape...he said "now lean back".   I lay against my arms the egg inside of me..is raging ...part your legs punkin....let me have access to my cunt... ..and he takes off ...and the music cranks ...and we drive...his hands touch me then stop and I start to lose myself in his singing ...the music and the ride...

Part two of the ride next