Outing is one of the vilest things that can happen to someone in this lifestyle.
Because… like… How dare you!
Who the hell do you think you are to put someone at risk like that?
Who they decide is worthy of sharing their private life with is not your choice to make.
And if you intentionally do that… not only do I see you as a danger to the community, I also see you as a weak and pathetic individual, who rather than doing the hard work of figuring out and addressing why they feel the need to shit all over someone else, consciously decides to take the cowardly route of puking their misery out on to those around them.
What about that intent thing though?
An unintentional slip of the tongue.
No ill intent.
We are all human.
As humans, we are superb at making mistakes.
I get that.
Such a mistake is forgivable… providing….
There are demonstrated lessons learned by the one who cocked it all up (FYI… Demonstrating that takes time and effort on the part of the fucker upper)
The offender takes ownership of their mistake
They attempt to make amends to the injured party - recognizing amends may not be welcome but they respectfully try all the same (and know when to back off if those efforts are not received well)
It is not a pattern of behavior but rather an ‘oopsie’
They demonstrate an understanding that regardless of their intent, they have hurt someone
Why am I prattling on about this?
Ponder this…
What if someone new to this lifestyle played a seemingly intentional role in outing someone?
Perhaps at the time they were unaware of how serious an offense outing is in this community?
I struggle to grasp that but… maybe?
Maybe they were all hopped up on the 50 Shades version of this lifestyle and saw it as a joke?
But… it’s no fucking joke for the person who was outed.
And… I cycle back to… Who the fuck do you think you are playing with people like that?
So…
Where does this scenario fit in?
Would you classify this as ill intent?
Stupidity?
Naivety?
Somewhere in between?
Hmmm?
Ponderous indeed…