New Beginnings

I can't believe how much has happened in the past few months.

I decided it was time to throw myself in at the deep end after feeling like I had only been dipping my toe into the waters of the community for a long while. It was time to really push myself out of my comfort zone and try to overcome the anxieties.

I am so glad I did. I have been to new munches, gone out with kinky friends, girl's nights out, attended educational workshops and meditation groups full of brilliant kinky women.

Tomorrow I am doing something I have wanted to do for a long time. Playing at a play event, for the first time! Eeeeeeeeee.

I have met so many wonderful people on my journey. So full of content and gratitude ❤️

Today is the day that I ask him to be my Sir. 

He has been so patient and supportive and repeatedly reassured me to wait until I am ready... And I finally feel ready to begin this new adventure. I wanted to do something special as words didn't quite seem enough, so I have made him a card that reads:

"My submission is yours, if you so wish to accept.

Will you be my Sir?"

I hope he likes it. I am so excited. 

These past few weeks have been absolutely incredible and my heart feels so full. I've spent a lot of time looking after myself, doing fun things and surrounding myself with both vanilla and kinky friends who are so wonderful and supportive and uplifting. I feel so blessed and grateful to have them in my life and I cannot thank them enough. ❤️

I have started to feel comfortable being myself again and it is relieving to feel accepted, I can slowly see my sparkle coming back. I have so much less to worry about and my brain feels so much more at peace.

Andddddd - I had my first impact scene in quite a while which was eeeeeeeeee. ✨🥰

This is chapter one. The start to my journey of finding and rediscovering myself again after bits have been chipped off and lost along the way.

I'm not sure when it was exactly; when my light got dimmed. I think it was a proceed that happened over time. Feelings of never being good enough, a need to change myself to be accepted for who I was, I'm sure both played a big factor. I was lost, scared, helpless. 

I have put everything behind me and realised the desperate need to start afresh. To do things differently. And for the first time in months I can feel my light beginning to glow again.

At this point I'm not sure which direction life will take me, I don't have it all figured out yet. All I know is that I will be prioritising myself. I won't settle for less than I deserve. And I am going to have some much needed fun.

Over the past few days I have spoken to some truly incredible people in the community who I will be eternally grateful for their support and friendship. Thank you reaching out, encouraging me, and reminding me of what it means to shine. ✨