3 years ago. August 5, 2020 at 6:07 PM
Are you there My Moon?
It is late, the world is still, and I decided to creep outside on this clear night. I lay my pale naked skin against the grass and let the darkness swallow me whole. I close my eyes and take the deepest breath in before I open my sky blue eyes and focus on you.
I long for you to see me, to know that I am here, and to see that I exist. I know I am so little in this big giant world, and at times I feel so lost. I look out at night, and I take comfort knowing that you are watching over me even when you do not know it yet.
I wish that you could reach out and touch me right now. I want to feel you run your hand on my cheek, and tilt my chin up to meet your gaze. I want to surrender my soul to you and know that you would keep it safe. To know that I could submit myself and not be abused or hurt beyond consent.
The tears are running down my face because I want this so deeply. I want to be connected with you on a level that no one can understand. I have been so hurt, and my kindness has been abused. I know that you would not betray me in any way. Can you help me repair myself? Is it ok that most of the time I am not strong? Are you willing?
Moon, I wish you see me here in the grass naked, pale skin glowing against your light just like a shiny star. I want you to wash over me, envelop me, and lay your claim on me. Take me as yours, and what I have to give because I have a lot to offer. I want my sadness to wash away, and replaced by the joy that only you can give.
I close my eyes, I take another deep breath which comes out as a sigh, wipe my tears, and then open my eyes one more time. Outloud I whisper " Are you there my Moon?"