My first time was a threesome. It was the perfect storm of alcohol, bad intentions, and my ability to read and push things. Looking back, of course it was about fucking two chicks at once, but over time that singular event galvanized in me a desire to break away from the pack and do something different. It instilled in me the confidence to take what I want, and not shy away from situations that could offer a unique experience. I became about the experience. Pushing things to the edge. By the time I was 18 I had lived out many dreams men spend a lifetime trying to fulfill. Babysitter, teacher, twins, hot MILF, and the list goes on.
Like distant memories each event lives on inside me. I can see vividly white flesh on brown as the events of my first time play out in my head. Each girl riding me and the awkward transition that followed. I remember that heart shaped mole on the teacher’s inner thigh while I clumsily tried to slip on a condom, before finally saying “fuck it” and going in raw. Those events helped fashion me into what I have become, and what I continue to grow into.
The most common question I get asked is, “How long have you been dominant?” To me dominance is like breathing. It’s as much a part of me as my arm, leg, or mini-me (not that it’s all that mini.) Those events I mentioned were brought about because of my nature, a byproduct of that dominance. Another byproduct was the path that was made up of all these events that led me to become a Dom.
These days any loudmouth fuckboy can be a Dom. My inbox is littered with horror stories about these guy’s blowing up women like they already own them. Like these women don’t have a choice? It’s all about choice dipshit. It’s sad really. I remember D/s when you had to actually put some effort into learning about it, and not just pull a label off of a website because it looks cool and you’re into kinky sex.
Don’t get me wrong, kinky sex is great, but to me sex is just a tool. just one of the many ways a Dom exerts control over a sub, and to relegate yourself to just that one avenue to me is a bit myopic. Society today tends to breed myopia though, so perhaps the potential pool is getting flooded with shallow posers and predatory opportunists looking for a quick score.
I probably shouldn’t be so harsh. The thing is, being dominate is a subjective thing. Anyone can be legitimately called a Dom, because there’s always someone naïve enough to buy into a title. It’s what you do with that title that really matters though. To me, being a Dom, is far deeper than being in control and issuing orders. It’s about respect and responsibility. It’s about being that voice in the back of a subs mind. The voice that overrides her conscience. It’s about imprinting on another individual your particular likes, needs, and dislikes and having them do their best to fulfill them.
It’s an awesome feeling to be in control on that level. Sometimes, I wonder if it’s what subs feel when they are servicing, only in reverse. The human mind is a fascinating organ, one capable of such amazing feats and equally impressive debauchery. I intend to keep filling mine with epic experiences while continuing to learn and grow.