Online D/s relationships

Re: Online D/s relationships

Miss Magdalena​(sub female){FreeSpirit} • Feb 1, 2019

Hello, Closet Sub. I love your question and without dredging my entire life story I will do my best to give you my perspective, as many here have done already.

1. How would that work?
From my experience, it works like any other relationship (both romantic and platonic) you have/had in your life. With trust and communication. Given the diversity of our species, we all gain personal growth and happiness in different ways, and I say with complete confidence, that there is no one way to pursue that.

a. How do I gain trust and communication in an online relationship?
From my experience, both time and willingness. It takes time to develop rapport with anyone we meet, be it online or in person. Because of my personal experiences, I found the only way I was able to experience true emotional vulnerability was online. I say that without shame or regret. I learned a lot about who I am as a woman, by investing my time and emotions in the two relationships I pursued online. While I am indeed a physical touch loving person, it was honestly impossible for me to reach the depth I have in my in person relationship I have now, without getting past some mental barriers I had before.

b. Given that disclosure, I can confidently say, I am grateful for the technological genius and forums we as humans have created. We are social creatures and we find ways to enhance our social experiences as we grow as a species. Why limit yourself if you could gain something from an experience?

2. What does either person get out of it?

a. What I personally got out of my online D/S relationships were as follows:
1. Personal Growth (This is probably the BIGGEST gain I received) - it came with a lot of emotional pleasure AND pain.
2. Self Awareness - I learned a hell of a lot about myself as both a woman and a human being.
3. Communication Skills - In all the in person relationships I had before my online ones, I was not able to learn as much about effective communication, as I was when I was in my online ones. Effective communication is extremely important for every relationship we have, but an online relationship was a true trial by fire for me in regards to this since there isn't as much to distract you from the soul you're connecting with.
4. Knowledge - I learned a lot about myself as a woman and what I need for a truly fulfilling relationship. I laugh at myself a little, to not have realized how much the mental component mattered to me in my sex life. With the pause on a predominantly physical relationship, I was able to explore what my needs were emotionally and mentally. Is it possible to do this, with a in person relationships? Of course. I was just unable to do so, before exploring online ones.
5. Happiness/Sadness - I got to experience a kaleidoscope of emotions in my online relationships. While non of them turned out to be that "forever" person, and I went through some really heavy shit, I regret nothing. Both experiences were vastly different from one another and allowed me to explore both my most masochistic and little type self.

Regardless of the opinions and experiences here, I feel only you can really determine what is right for you. How you go about that and the limits and mental structures you erect, will make all the difference in how you achieve your own personal happiness and growth. These limits and structures are necessary for each and everyone of us, in our own unique way. Good luck, OP!