Bunnie
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5 years ago •
Aug 31, 2019
5 years ago •
Aug 31, 2019
@ AllyKitten,
An important process along the path of getting to know yourself as a submissive, is knowing what provides a feeling of safety and comfort to you.
These are the things that will help you as you become more comfortable with becoming vulnerable.
For some it is a warm, fluffy blanket wrapped around them... for others it can be a favourite piece of clothing... for others a stuffie... for some it can be a type of food (icecream/chocolate)... but it really can be anything that helps you feel safe... that brings nourishment to your soul.
As great (and necessary) as it is after play, to have your Dominant/Top there for comfort and support... from my own personal perspective, I believe it’s important to also have your own system of support in place as well. Not only can there be times where them being there is simply not an option... I just think it best for us to learn to nourish ourselves also, rather than becoming accustomed to seeking it outside of ourselves. This is very much an “each to their own” thing though.
Some other things that aren’t necessarily “comforting,” however I still consider necessary, are to make sure you’re hydrated (drink water), to eat something more substantial than treats (fruit and nuts can be good, salads etc.), make sure you’re warm... we can go into a type of “shock” after playing so it’s important to help bring our nervous system, as well as our (potentially triggered) mental/emotional system, back into balance.
There are a lot of factors occurring. That’s why education is so important within this lifestyle... it’s never just simply whatever...
Most important... be gentle with yourself. A lot of things get stirred up and shifted around... especially in the beginning. It can be scary and overwhelming. If you need to have a good cry... have a good cry. Go with the flow of how you’re feeling. A lot of pent up stuff is coming to the surface. I find writing helps a lot. Talk with your Sir. If you have a support group, talk with them... if not, reach out here... there are plenty of people who love to help.
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