Slave/Master Contract

Slave/Master Contract

subwifemom • Apr 30, 2020

With everything that has been said and I have learned. I have been thinking about for fathers day giving my husband a vanillaish master/ slave contract for the whole month 30 days. I would think about what I am and am not willing to do. I would set my own bounders for punishment, sex, and what ever else I can think of (help with this part would be great). I will present it to him and see how he fells about it. After a month (30 days) I believe he may want to renegotiate a new contract. I fell this would be a great way to get him off the BDSM thinking and allow him a chance to enter the world with out feeling the stigmatism of the label.

Questions
1. Where is a good place to find a contract templet?
2. What are somethings I should include or exclude in the contract?
3. How do I add in about when the kids are around?
4. Should house cleaning be a part of the contact?
5. Should I allow him to pick what I will call him (i.e. Sir, Master, Husband, Love,)?
6. Do you think this a good idea or not?
Please remember this a starter contract so It should be somewhat vanilla!

tallslenderguy​(other male) • Apr 30, 2020

my random thoughts and feelings (only one guys of course):

i'm not keen on static contracts as i see people and relationship as fluid, and contracts tend to be static. But i get having a foundation to build on. i think the 30 day idea is great!.
i see a contract as between people, in this case two people, who usually both have say in the contents? I.e., the idea of a "gift contract" (though i appreciate the sentiment behind it) seems one sided? i may read you wrong and it's your intent to include Him in the writing of the contract, even though it's a gift? Not a "surprise" gift?

To me, the biggest challenge of any relationship is feeling trust and safe. Everyone seems to emphasize the subs trust and safety, but i think the hallmark of a 'healthy' relationship is balance. In this case, i'm referring to the Dom needing to be able to trust and feel safe with the sub just as much as the sub needs to trust and feel safe with their Dom. Image is so big a deal in our culture that many don't seem to know the difference between appearance and reality. Some guys will put on a 'strong front' to present the image of knowing or being secure, so they get a semblance of affirmation. It's illusion, but so many go by that. Sorry, rabbit trail. What i am saying is, i would not be the least bit surprised if your Husband has a whole list of kinky desires and fantasies, or at least the makings of those kinks, if He felt safe about having and expressing them?

i see the basis of any agreement as a foundation of safety where either is free to express who they are. That, to me, is not the same as chemistry where there is a symbiotic attraction, but it's how we discover the places where we have chemistry. E.g., you may be craving enemas and He may have a secret craving to penetrate you anally, but neither of you has ever felt safe opening up and trusting the other with that knowledge. i think that is common to all relationship, that security and trust is progressive, but i think that is the fluid type of stuff that needs to go in a contract, something that will nurture and build safety and trust.

Literate Lycan​(dom male) • Apr 30, 2020

For what it’s worth, I felt Jack wrote a decent one as a potential starter. Here is his blog:

https://thecage.co/blog/userblog.php?postid=32346&blog_id=25965

I’m not a contractual kind of guy regarding relationships, so I’m not much help beyond that. Best of luck.

subwifemom • Apr 30, 2020

I belive I may have miss stated my intent. My husband is not one right now that would sit down and work it out with me. I was thinking of it as a gift so he could use it or not taking into account what I know of his prefrances we have been togeather for 12 years and I know I dont know everything about him but I thought it would be a good way to say hey I am intrested in this how do you fell about it. I would also be willing and plan to leave a place for him to write in and change as the month gos along. I was just trying to think of a jumping point

MasterRon​(dom male) • Apr 30, 2020

I have a sample contract here, if you want to start with an example. But it may not be suitable for someone very new.

https://docs.google.com/document/d/1d5JHZsyAyAylV7EcJ9PGlZM4pxwPSByK-HZvluB3E5Q/edit?usp=drivesdk

Azzabackam​(switch male){PawPawGirl} • May 1, 2020

To be fair, a literal contract isn't all that complicated. It's just a physical form for a conversation couples should have: what they want, what they need, and what they agree to do for each other. You're free to build it, write it, and structure it any way you see fit. Just make sure you think through your wording and what you're promising, and make sure you're prepared to follow through with whatever is in it.

skyrich​(dom male){rottenbrat} • May 1, 2020

I have to agree w/ Azzabackam. The contract that MasterRon has is far too involved for what you have in mind.

All you really need is a document laying out what you'd like to see happening in your relationship. Or really, to heck with the contract, just have a conversation.

--Rich

Samsea​(dom male) • May 1, 2020

Sounds to me like a glass of wine and a chat fully explaining why 'You' want he to engage in a contract, verbal or otherwise.

It's Good To Talk...

Good luck

UrPersonalSexToy​(sub male) • May 2, 2020

I'd say put a clause in it that extends his time. Such as every time you cum your mine another thirty days.

skyrich​(dom male){rottenbrat} • May 2, 2020

Let's not lose sight of the fundamentals here. In this case subwifemom's dom is her husband. They already have a formal document regarding their relationship. It's called a Marriage Certificate.

@subwifemom
In addition to talking things through things with your husband, you *could* suggest that he read some of the forums here, and blogs of people that you've come to like. Show him what BDSM is and what it is *NOT*.

My own blog has some articles, (Responsibility, Commitment, and The Journey), that may be helpful. I invite you to read them, and if they resonate with you, perhaps have your husband read them.